With Last Call mixing up the AM/PM, YHC stepped in to fill his massive shoes and took a lot of heat for using a kneeling pad on top of my usual mat. When you’re on your knees as much as YHC, you need a little padding. Wait, I mean when you’re as old as YHC. Shut up losers.
Author: EF Hutton
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Three Holes, Two Fingers
If only Gypsy’s brush guard could have cleared the signage at Cottrell then Pigskin wouldn’t have ended up at Three Chopt and Gaskins.
Here was the prescribed route:
- R on Pump
- R on Buffapple
- L on Singingwoods
- R on Brookmont
- L on Cox
- R on Cedar Knoll
- R on Cottrell
- Merge onto path into Deep Run Park
- L onto main road through Deep Run Park
- L on Ridgefield
- R on Falconbridge
- R on Raintree/Pump (M/L)
- L on Maremont
- Back to Godwin and VSF
Numberama, Nameorama, COT
MOLESKIN
What Senor Frog does with his fingers on a Thursday night is no one’s business but his. Mr. Rogers is working on a concept album and ready to rock the Bluegrass Jam to its core next May.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Prayers for Charlotte
Prayers for those protectors who put their lives in the way of harm Lunch Tuesday at Tres Machos
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RIP Bushwhacker Butch
Handshake parked in Kubota’s spot and set off the following chain reaction.
Moseying COT
- SSHs x 14 for Falcon
- Don Quixotes
- Imperial Walkers
- Helicopters
- Hand Release Merkins
- Flutter Kicks
Auto Bingo (Mosey down Culpepper to the northern Taint)
- Cars/ Crossovers – Merkins x 5
- SUVs – Squats x 5
- Pickups/ Vans – Burpees x 2
Love Hill
- P1 – Run to Ross and back
- P2 – Bearcrawl, Lunge, 5 SSHs/5 Steps
- Booyah Merkins x 6 at each flip
Dora 1-2-3
- P1 – Bernie to Thom and Run Back
- P2 – Carolina Dry Docks, Monkey Humpers, LBCs
Mosey back to Parking Lot
Get Railed!
- P1 – Lunge across half of parking lot
- P2 – Incline Merkins, Dips, Decline Merkins on Rail
Mosey back to VSF
Mary
- Freddie Mercurys
- APDs
- Hello Dollys
- SSHs x 14 for Falcon plus 1 for the Ranger in the Sky
Numberama, Nameorama, COT
MOLESKIN
Backblast title has nothing to do with anything in the workout, but YHC somehow got on the topic of wrasslin at coffee and was whisked away to the good ol’ days when we ran the high school halls telling everyone to “Suck It” with a crisp crotch chop. Also showed the boys my 4th grade class photo rocking my favorite Bushwhackers t-shirt. Don’t ask about my Koko B. Ware t-shirt, still hurts. Lastly of note, Wojo has partied with the Nature Boy and lived to tell the tale.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Memorial Day Convergence – details to follow
Prayers for Charlotte
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Tattoo Removal
The hills were waiting, so off we went. Here’s where:
- Head out around Lake clockwise and up past the baseball field out to College
- R on College to the corner of Campus and Boatwright
- Take the path on left over and L on Wheeler
- R on Gardiner
- R on Chandler
- Take the cut-through, or maze, to Bandy Field for one complete loop, Counterclockwise
- Return to Campus via Chandler, Gardiner, Wheeler and path
- Take Campus Dr.
- 5s/6s – Head up both arms of Old Mill
- All – Ascend Bostwick
- 4s/5s – Return to VSF via UR Drive
- 6s – Take Campus Dr and L on College, enter behind baseball field, counterclockwise of Lake and back to VSF
Numberama, Nameorama, COT
MOLESKIN
Not sure anyone did the route 100% as prescribed, but it was fun to try. The cut-through to Bandy ain’t what it used to be. Sippy took a tumble, but no injuries reported thankfully. Hitch may have a new spokesperson for Portadash. Next time we’ll do Bandy Clockwise for a spicy little treat.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
UpChuck looking for someone to take ownership over The Bridge
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A Bro Code Trip Through Norway via Jordan
Last Friday of the month means Bro Code, but it doesn’t have to be The Bro Code.
This was Bro enough:
- R on Pump
- L on Old Prescott
- L on Ridgefield
- L on Rolfield
- R on Colonist
- L on Rolfe Way
- R on John Rolfe
- R on Glen Eagles
- L on Old Prescott
- R on Pump
- Back to Godwin and VSF
Numberama, Nameorama, COT
MOLESKIN
Fun fact, you can get to Norway via Jordan and Romania or something like that, but you must start in Northern Virginia. UpChuck has some mediocre jokes and a pretty good one about Horticulture.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Need someone to take over The Bridge
Safe travels for many this week
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No Bat Signal
No Last Call, no bat signal, but somehow 3 knew that 60 degrees meant Broga. Dogs, Cobras, Cats, Cows, Scorpions, and of course ball lickers among other positions and movements were performed.
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Day 6 – The Climax
Nothing ambiguous about two studs enjoying a whiskey pour and deciding to bash together at DogPile.
Here’s what transpired:
Handshake takes the lead and we sashayed past some hulking men in uniforms and big flashy sirens
- COT – SSHs, Helicopters, Monkey Humpers, APDs, Inverted Scorpion Kicks, Plank
Mosey to the amphitheater stage
Threesome Check
- P1/P2 – Run around amphitheater and meet up for Booyah Merkins x 10
- P3 – People’s Chair
- Alternate until P1/P2/P3 have run 6 times and sat 3 times
Amphitheater Grind – 10 Scrunchy Frogs on each step
EF Hutton assumes control
Mosey partly down Love Hill
Discover virgin territory and take a new partner
- Start on top with Merkins x 10
- Go down for Dips x 20
- Slowly come back up stopping for Merkins x 10 with feet on your partner’s shoulders
- Finish coming up to the top for Booyah WWIIs x 20
Mosey down the pipe shaft
Threesome Check 2
- P1 – run from the base of the pipe to the tip then circle around the backside
- P2 – Heels to Heaven
- P3 – Hand Release Merkins
Stop before finishing and shift positions over to Love Hill
- Lindsay – DryDocks/ Hammers
Mosey back to VSF for a few vinegar strokes and the counterclockwise swirl.
Numberama, Nameorama, COT
MOLESKIN
Thirty minutes after signing up for a week of Qs, F3RVA’s favorite 8 year old regretted it, but it was too late, the word was out and there was no looking back. One man was smitten enough to make it to all 6 Handshake romps in the gloom. People will say it’s love. The proof is in the man pudding. All ambiguous jokes aside, congrats on 8 years. Keep bringing the mumblechatter, pencil rolls, and chaos brother.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Prayers for Wojo’s Mom and Roger Roger’s FIL
Breaking Bread needs someone for Sunday this month
The Bridge – looking for new RVA leadership
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Paint Colors and Street Names
Determined to run anywhere but Pump or old school Bro Code, here’s where YHC directed the PAX today.
Here’s where:
- L on Pump
- R on Carisbrook
- R on Oakway and continue on Green Mt
- L on N Bank
- L on Tunbridge and cross Gayton
- L on Stoneycreek and re-cross Gayton
- R on Whitaker Woods and continue on Locust Hill
- R on Weather Vane
- R on Green Mt and continue on Oakway
- L on Carisbrook
- R on Pump
- L on Falconbridge
- L on Hickoryridge and continue on Windingridge
- R on Falconbridge
- R on Pump
- Back to Godwin and SF
Numberama, Nameorama, COT
MOLESKIN
According to a scientific study, today’s run was the greatest running Q of all time, the PAX ran further and faster than any group of 8 men has done in the history of time. And the Q is the best-looking Q that ever lived. Just presenting the raw data. UpChuck moved into insurance only after his business naming paint colors and suburban streets fell on hard times.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Need someone to take over The Bridge – skills needed – Persistent Pesterer
Westhoe 2nd Tuesday 2nd F – Joey’s Hot Dogs this week
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Mad Dog Marv vs. Ravishing Rammer Rude
Faceplant would have loved the route so much if only he hadn’t gotten lost on the way there. Here’s that route:
- UR Drive uphill
- L on Campus
- Take path and L on Wheeler
- R on Ridge Top
- L on Patterson
- L on Westham
4s
- L on Club Vista
- L on College
- R on Keller
- R on Westhampton Way
- L on UR Dr back to VSF
5s
- L on Club Vista
- L on College
- R behind baseball field
- Circle Lake back to VSF
6s
- Cross River onto S Ridge
- Continue onto Westham Station
- Pickup .5 miles along the way
- Continue via Batcave back to VSF
Numberama, Nameorama, COT
MOLESKIN
While awaiting the last runners to arrive back for the COT, Marv admitted that 70 yo Bob “Rammer” Ramsey, play-by-play guy for St. Louis, gave him a few good hooks to the rib cage during VCU’s dustup with the Billikens Friday night. Marv is planning his revenge. I’m thinking a Tombstone Piledriver through the scorer’s table at the A-10 Tourney.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Prayers for our Union (and also for Canada, ha)
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Sex and Anger
Like crumbs left behind as the Trianglers flushed and headed off to stop 2, four men proceeded as usual.
Here’s what transpired:
UpChuck Q
Mosey to the Amphitheater
- Alternating any style Merkins x 5, Good Squats x 5 up the stairs
- Plankorama
Fudd Q
Mosey to the Rusty Cage
- Pullups x 5
- Suzanne Somers L/R x 10
- Dips x 5
- Repeato for 5 rounds
Helix Q
Dora
- Merkins
- Squats
- SSHs
- Partner skip to the fire hydrant and run back
EF Hutton Q
Mosey to Ha’Penny Stage
Touch-a-Tree (4 trees per round)
- Donkey Kicks
- Balls to the Wall
- Dirty Hookups
Mosey back to VSF
Mary
- LBCs
- Heels to Heaven
- Hello Dollys
- Rosalitas
Ring of Fire x 2
30 seconds of stretching
Numberama, Nameorama, COT
MOLESKIN
Hats off to all that complete the frozen triangle, and a bow to those who are doing for the 2nd time in 2 weeks. Solid work among those of us who stayed behind to keep DogPile secure. Section 8 housing sounds like a really interesting place if you have an NDA. Care packages are provided.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Prayers for UpChuck’s friends Mike and Becca