Author: Lab Rat

  • OK, Portland…we get it…

    18 runners and ruckers showed up for another beautiful morning here in the Pacific Northwest. Yeah, we get it…your weather sucks. Give us back our 20 degrees and clear winter days like we should have. Enough already with the rain.

    Despite the dreary start, it was actually a nice morning for a run. We ran the always popular Reverse Carillon route. It’s nice to call it out, because nobody bitches and everybody either knows where to go or tags along with somebody that does. Work got done, that is all.

    Bleeder heard BT and Lab Rat coming behind and finished the last half mile running an 8 minute mile split. Easy to catch, hard to pass. Respect.

    Lab Rat apologizes…

  • This Happened Yesterday

    Six showed up to run the trails on a beautiful frozen Sunday. Furley and Gong Show paired up and found a rhythm that nobody was keeping up with, so we set them loose to tackle Forest Hill. Offshore and Lab Rat teamed up with Lug Nut to do 4.5 miles, turning back at Reedy Creek and throwing in a few spurs to get the distance up a little. Upchuck was testing out the legs and wisely did not push his luck.

    ET’s was lively as well, even if it were just Upchuck and Lab Rat. Conversation did not lag.

    Lab Rat apologizes…

  • Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute

    Sunday was a weird one, as many of the usual suspects were MIA.  3 runners and one fat bike rider showed up at the designated time and location to check off the box.  Route for runners was North bank to T. Pott bridge and back on Buttermilk.  Fun was had, and the lead (running and conversation) was swapped between us all.  Great trio of runners.

    We caught up with Tonka at the bridge and were talking with him about his comment on TYA being in Gong Show’s car….we told him he was not in fact there, he asked who was.  That’s when the BB got titled, and many creative names came up for FNG in tow.  In the end, I settled on the less controversial “Gong Show” after listening to his keys, or bear bells, or symbols clashing together in his fanny pack for a couple miles.

    Apologies to Tonka for not sticking with the “man whore” theme…I just couldnt do it.  Maybe next time.

     

    Lab Rat apologizes….

     

  • The ruck not traveled

    “Two ruckers diverged in the gloom and neither took the workout less traveled,

    and that made all the difference”

    9 grownup men and 0 ruckers converged in the gloom to an announced “rucker friendly” workout.  Since nobody was carrying weight, the Q changed it all up.  Here is the workout most traveled:

    -Parking lot tracers.  You know it!

    -COP: If you’ve seen one Lab Rat COP, you’ve seen them all

    -Triple Check-  On the football field, Player 1 runs to the goal post and back.  Player 2 does hand release merkins and squats if needed.  Player 3 does rotating Mary of his choice.

    -Rotating pullups- pax planks in a line in front of pullup station.  Pax1 does 10 pullups while pax 2 spots him.  Rotate thru so everyone gets a turn.

    -Phonics’ sprints of death:  Im sure there is a better name for them, but this pretty much sums it up.  Teams of three…basically you sprint 50 yards, tag out a partner, then do 5 burpees.  Do this 5 times.  When everybody is done, bear crawl to the middle.  We screwed it up, but all points were covered.   These suck, bt dubs.

    -burpee indian run:  Just like it sounds.  We took the long way home, and switched it up into basically a Chinese fire drill Indian run.  It did not go smoothly.

    Ring of Fire (Rosie style):  From Al Gore, first guy drops does 10 merkins then holds plank.  Pass it around to everybody.  Back to first guy, 10 more merkins and back to Al Gore…then pass it back around.

    NMS

    Lab Rat announced this would be rucker friendly on the local boards, with an AYE from Spit and Shakedown.  Circle K also showed up this morning with ruck sack and layers of clothing.  Something happened between 0530 and 0530 and a half that made these two ditch the rucks and join parking lot tracers instead of heading for the designated rendezvous.  What exactly happened, we may never know……or Shakedown can tell us.  Regardless, Lab Rat took full advantage of the freedoms gifted to him to completely change the planned Q to something more mobile and fluid.  One can imagine what caused Spit to be a no-show.  My money is on a late night with the baby, which is always a free pass in my book.

    Exactly nine guys lent well to the triple check.  Options were given, which made the hand release merkins a little more palatable to the group.  No excuse for bad form.  Emoji made the comment on how long the field was….120 yards for those counting at home, just like every other football field.

    Phonics’ sprints plus burpees thing seemed like a good idea at the time.  I remember there being a little break in between to catch your breath.  Nothing is so disheartening as finishing a round of burpees and standing up to see your “relief” sticking his hand out to high 5 you back out to run.

    The Indian run back with burpees was going well…..too well.  Audible was called that instead of burpees, run around the group before returning to the front of the line.  There were two lines.  It was a Charlie Foxtrot.  Pretty sure Pavaratti just kept running in circles the whole time.  That’s ok, we can work on that.

    Announcements:

    -Still plenty of room on the Growruck event.  There are loaner weights and packs available.

    -Extra credit ruck at 0500 at Dogpile.  Run kicks off at 0530 from Elwood Thompson’s.

     

    Apology of the week goes out to Robert Frost for butchering up his life’s work just to get a cheap chuckle out of the pax.

     

    Lab Rat apologizes…

     

  • “I was looking for Antrim with a U”

    21 pax and evidently a pair of ghost bikers met the day with ferocity this morning.  Serpentine route maps were handed out and met with groans….but in the end most seemed to like the route.  Shakedown even sent me a pic of the route on a map because he said it looked cool!

    Nobody got lost, but Singer joked that he got lost because he was looking for Antrim with a “u”…obviously my prowess as as cool looking route designer is not matched by spelling skills!  So much for laminating these maps! Back to the drawing board…

    No ice or barking raccoons this morning….which was a first on the Serpentine run.  Handshake was barking a bit and laying waste to runners in his tailwind, but that’s par for the course around here.

    Here’s to hoping everybody had an awesome day!

     

    Lab Rat apologizes…

  • ISO: Volleyball court

    11 Magellans defrosted the windows to start their day the Lab Rat way:

    -Parking Lot tracers

    COP-  The same stuff we always do.

    Find the volleyball court. Unsuccessful.

    Bail to tennis court for Lazy Lindsay:  10 Merkins/30 situps first corner.  add 5/subtract 5 each corner until back to original for 30 merkins/10 situps.  Bear crawl long ways, lunge with knee touching the ground short ways.

    Mosey to soccer field, stopping at benches for 20 dips OYO

    BEAST:  run the length of the field stopping 3 times out/3 times back to perform 6 of prescribed exercise. 666….get it?  -merkins -crab cakes -deep squats -alabama prom dates TIME

    Opus took us out.

    NMS

    -There’s just something about parking lot tracers to get me in a better mood!  Glad to see some old faces and new out this morning!  Emoji brought out the yuks during COP.  Several brought out the confusion during Lindsay and the Beast.  “How many do we do now?” was asked 100 times this morning.  Rounders was back in action this morning as well, great to see him out.  He claims to have popped a button when he put on his dress blues last time, so we expect he will be joining us a little more frequently in the near future.  We are planning a poker night, too….let me know if you are interested in getting in on that.  All in all a beautiful morning to get after it….even with the heavy frost.  The stars were out in strong fashion.

    I swear to you all….there used to be a dang volleyball court out there somewhere.

     

    Apology of the week goes out to Yard Sale and whomever else found that knee deep pit of semi frozen mud.

    Lab Rat apologizes…

  • The snow started early

    Which was perfect!  7 runners made the cutoff +5 minutes to beat the snow…but not quite. No plans were set in stone, even though Ollivander showed up in full hydration mode, looking like he was ready to run 20 miles.

    TYA suggested Forest Hill loop and back, which was perfect, so we went with that.  Lab Rat set the pace, aiming for bro code speeds.  The group stayed together the whole way and were joined by the snow as we climbed up Forest Hill.  It was a beautiful morning and we hit the snow perfectly….it was starting to get slick as we were finishing up.  ET’s after for the win.

    We must have just missed Flipper….we gave him 5 minutes then had to let the ponies run.  We caught up with him right after COT, so we will throw him a bone and put him in the pax list.

    Lab Rat apologizes…

  • How NOT to Plant a Shovel Flag With a Ruck

    13 Rucksacks, 4 sand bags, 1 shovel flag, and the appropriate number of pax for rucks decended upon DaVille this morning to wait on their Q.  He showed up with 30 seconds less than what time he needed to get an actual pair of gloves, but the workout at least started on time.

    Pax reluctantly joined Lab Rat at his vehicle after some prodding to pick up accessories for this mornings workout.  I mean, if we arent going to run, we have to carry stuff!  A little late night reconnaissance last night netted a huge score for those that either want free weight to carry around, or if anybody wanted to install their own home bocci ball course.  The local tennis courts have piles of old clay for the clay courts out back and I gained permission to take all I wanted.  “Enter the sand bag”….apologies to Metallica.

    We rucked over to basketball courts, where we let Bulkhead catch up to us and let EF Hutton secure the shovel flag and then fall over backwards.  NICE.  It went something like this:  Huge round of laughter…..wait is he ok????  Yes he is…..another round of laughter.  After things calmed down, we had a BIG disclaimer seeing this is the first time we have done this and the Q wanted zero reported injuries afterwards.  Regular COP with packs on the ground to ensure everybody loosened up and got the blood flowing before we did anything really stupid.

    We rucked thru the cedars because fun, looking for the beach volleyball courts….which somehow we didnt find.  No matter, the soccer field will suffice.  Triple check consisting of 20 ruck swings (point man), lunges with a sand bag, and situps with ruck on chest.  This was NO JOKE.  Afterwards, we bear crawled the width of the soccer field (kind of in the ditch????), followed by a ruck/shuffle to the front of the school.

    Once we reached the front, everybody took a nice comfy air seat against the “bulkhead”, where we did wall sits for a couple minutes, alternating between 45 degree and 90 degree knees.  Back to the traditional shovel flag spot, and we finished it up with 8 count body builders (slow cadence to protect the back of your head).  These also NO JOKE.  We did 6….7 would have been painful.

    It was great to see a diverse crowd of people out this morning!  Thanks to the traveling pax members for joining us.  I hope that everybody is sore but healthy.  My goal this morning was an intro to a rucking style workout where we tried out multiple new twists and nobody gets hurt…I hope it was successful.

    Apology of the week goes out to all pax for being rushed at the start.  For those that didnt hear, I was late because one of the dogs “hid” my shoes outside in the back yard.  Fun.

    Announcements:

    -GrowRuck the weekend of March 24th.  Honey Do is taking the lead, see preblast.  Pax coming so far from Roanoke, Hampton, Charlotte, and Pennsylvania!

    -Army Navy game this weekend, Bulkhead is buying the first round at a location to be disclosed soon.  Go Navy!

    -Mudface and No Idea are heading up a team for the Rugged Maniac on May 4th.  See them for the deets.

     

    Lab Rat apologizes…

     

  • They opened up the Carillon just in time for Veteran’s Day

    Little did Lab Rat know, but today was the Marine Corps birthday.  Seems only fitting that a squid should take the Q to talk about how awesome vets are on a day to celebrate the Corps.  Luckily, 1 marine and 18 others came out to join him.

    COP-  Run around the circle and do some karaoke plus backwards run.  To loosen you up, Spit!  Then a bunch of the usual stuff.  If you’ve seen one LR COP, you’ve seen them all.

    THANG-

    -Give me 5:  Mosey up the long awaited open carillon steps and circle up.  All Vets (even Marines) take 1 step in.  Go around the circle and state your service, pax gives each member 5 burpees.  Vets present were:  Lab Rat, Honeydo, Bone Thug, and Bulkhead.  Then, go around the circle and each pax member calls out a vet they are close to.  Pax gives 5 merkins in honor of each vet.  Hardywood didnt not cry.

    -Legs and abs day:  from bottom of amphitheater, 3 jump ups on each step to the top.  From the top, 3 V-ups on each step to the bottom.

    -7’s on the Rusty Cage:  6 pullups or jerkins, 1 Captain Thor.  -1/+1 until you get to 1 pullup, 6 Capt. Thor.

    -Beast:  Across the Carillon field:  Merkins, WW2 situps, DEEP squats, monkey humpers, Wilson’s punching bag????

    NMS

    This is the only themed workout that I will do….unless you count the disc golf.  I stumbled on this a couple years ago, and it’s just too good to not make an annual thing.  Hardywood is an emotional dude, and told me after for the third year in a row, he got choked up talking about his grandfather in the circle.  I like to spread the wealth across my vet heavy family, but Papa Kenney got the nod again this year for obvious reasons.  S;pit needed to leave early, so we shuffled this to the front of the workout.  It was great being able to head up to the top of the Carillon after being off of it for a year.  If I read correctly, it’s open thru Monday, then closed for another year as they continue renovations…

    The rest of the workout was great, with lots of banter….some at my expense.  This morning would have been a great morning to catch some sunrise on the bridge, but I didnt want the pax to get too spread out.  Tomorrow’s run should be glorious, though.

    Thanks to Bulkhead for making the trip down at my prodding.  I hope that he realizes that my picking at the Marines is totally in jest, and I have nothing but mad respect for those that wear the uniform.  Happy Birthday, Marine!

    HoneyDo dropped some bad news on us, that a friend of his (a veteran) took his life this week, after battling PTSD.  Love, comfort and prayers to you, your family and to his family.  This is tough to hear.

    Also, good to meet Bone Thug.  Glad to have you in the pax, my man!

    Apology of the Week goes out to UpChuck for stomping on his backwards counting.  I wanted a 10 count, and by God, I was getting one!

     

    Lab Rat apologizes…

  • The Double Let Down

    Flatline came out to join the merry runners of Before Noon DLite today, unfortunately for him it was an off day.

    Shakedown was first on the scene to greet him, in work clothes because he forgot his shorts.

    Lab Rat did his best, which is not saying much.  We almost got 3 miles in before I had to slow it down to a walk do to feeling pretty shaky and dizzy.  As Flatline put it, “it’s a good thing you are running with a nurse”…which made me feel better.  Then he told me about the 3 patients that died this week while walking.  Good feeling’s gone.

    Christopher’s Runaway chicken salad post run made it all better.

    Only those that post understand,

     

    Nevermind, Lab Rat apologizes…