Author: Johnsonville

  • The Murph that was Not

    Six of the faithful posted in the pre-dawn gloom at GridIron. It was cold. We started the day with a PreGame 3rd F study and discussion about the treatment of Knowledge in the Scripture.  The discussion was deep and meaningful, and there were many interesting interpretations and lessons.

    We then  entered the Gloom with YHC at Q.  YHC had planned a Murph, and instructions were given to run to the track, do 1.5 laps, run around the school grounds the long way, and convene at the pull-up bars.  HOWEVER, we arrived at the former location of the pull-up bars only to find that they had be removed during the prior week.  

    Improv time! This is how it went down, more or less (I am sure I am forgetting some things):

    COP — 50x ssh, 25x slow squats, 12x merkins

    Mosey to near side of 1st baseball / cricket field. COP with 25x slow American Hammers.

    Mosey to far side of 1st baseball field. Chiabatta bear crawl alt. forward & backward.

    Mosey to back baseball field. Chiabatta dips.

    Mosey to the battery of 4 tennis courts. Elevens running perimeter. 1 corner was merkins starting with 10. The opposite corner was LBCs starting at 1. All were 4 count for extra fun.

    Mosey toward school, stopping at basketball court. Plank walk 1/2 length of court with a burpee in the middle. Swith directions and plank walk the other 1/2 length.

    Mosey to end of pillars. 50x Alabama prom dates.

    Optional bear crawl about 60 yards along sidewalk to hedge row. Mosey back to VSF.

    COT with Earthworm taking us out.

    Thank you for the opportunity to lead! Jville

    Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:1 et seq.

  • The Alpine Beast

    Five of the faithful convened for #Twinteam on a dry, comfortable late-October morning.   Johnsonville (YHC) took the Q, and this is what went down, more or less.

    COP warmup in parking lot:
    25x ssh;
    25x mountain climbers
    20x don quiotes
    10x imperial walkers
    15x hillbilies

    Mosey maybe a 1/2 mile away over to the base of the TwinTeam hill for “the Alpine Beast” along about 200m of TwinTeam’s steepest incline. Like normal, there were 6 exercises, and we did 6 sets of 6 of each, but up and down the incline. Exercises were ‘mericans, side plank-walk strides (left), bear crawl strides, monkey humpers, side plank-walk strides (right), ‘mericans.

    Mosey back to VSF. COT

    Moleskin —

    It was pitch black on Twinteam this morning — as in you could not see your hand in front of your face. That made things quite interesting. People were running into each other and stepping on each other. The 3 stopping points along the way were completely random and variable.

    For future reference, it is probably better to plan the Alpine Beast for mornings when there is a moon. It did succeed in getting my heart rate up.

    There was not much mumble chatter, other than speculation about how Wilson would have handled the chaos of the Alpine Beast in pitch black darkness.

    Thanks for permitting me to lead.  Have a great weekend.  Jville

  • Crawlin’ in the Rain

    Five of the faithful gathered in the Gloom at Punisher on a rainy Monday morning. Johnsonville (YHC) as a few minutes late on account of a fairly bad single-car accident on 195 by the Woodfin HQ. Praying there were not serious injuries. Chum started things out, and this is how it went down, more or less:

    Mosey to west side of school form COP warmup.

    Chum led ssh, DonQuiotes, and, when YHC arrived, Hillbillies. I don’t really know what he led prior to the Hillbillies, but I’ve been around long enough to make sh** up.

    YHC took over for a slaughter starter a la 10 minutes of burpees.

    Mosey around the north side of the school to the bus loop.

    Classic descending curb crawl from 8 to 1, or something like that.

    COP 20x Dollies

    Line up with hands on curb for plank walks in cadence. 20x left. 20x right.

    COP 20x Freddie Mercs

    Edit: Line up with hands on curb for plank walks in cadence. 20x left. 20x right.

    Mosey to soccer field. Line up on end line for Dora with 100x pole smokers, 200x crab cakes, 300x nothing (ran out of time). Runner crab walked 20 steps, then ran to end line and back.

    Return to VSF in the driving rain. YHC took us out.

    MOLESKIN:

    We had a bit of a beaten up, injured crowd this morning. Clavin was nursing a broken rib, so YHC’s lineup of exercises was not idea. He persevered and alternated when needed.

    The 10 minutes of burpees seemed light compared to Charles Bronson / wheelbarrows / sand pit crawls last week.

    Thanks for letting me lead, Jville

  • Not Charles Bronson, but Close

    Thirteen of the faithful gathered on a fairly “slow-day” (at least in terms of numbers) at NoToll. The weather was crisp — so much so that there were groans upon first reclining in the plush grass. Johnsonville (YHC) took the Q, and this is what went down, more or less:

    Warmup with 25x ssh, 25x scorpians, 10x merkins, 25x IWs, and 25x DonQuiotes.

    Mosey to back parking lot. 10 burpees, then run the Four Square in the parking lot (run four laps around the perimeter of designated area sprinting side 1, then next time around sprinting sides 1-2, then next time around sprinting sides 1-3, and then next time around sprinting sides 1-4). Plank

    Mosey to back right field. COP arm circles. 10 burpees, then run the Four Square in the back right field. Plank

    Mosey to the back left field. COP under the light near the shelter — flutter kicks. 15 burpees, then run the Four Square in the back left field. Plank

    Mosey to the front left field. COP under the light near the shelter — Boats/Canoes (WHITE DEER!). [FAKE NEWS ALERT ~ THIS ONE WAS PLANNED BUT DID NOT HAPPEN –> 15 burpees, then run the Four Square in the front left field. Plank]

    Mosey back to SF. American Hammers.

    COT with Viral taking us out

    MOLESKIN:

    We had some fast runners out at GridIron this morning (or else I was extra slow). Rosie gets special mention for having run there and back home. This was a workout of fairly constant cardio pressure, and several commented on how similar it felt to Saturday’s Charles Bronson.

    There were comments about how much the Boat/Canoes and wheelbarrows Saturday hurt. (Mouth of) Wilson was particularly mumble-chattery this morning, even going so far as to attempt to shorten the duration of planks. I did not hear RammMan say a word this morning, but I have a feeling that he was quietly/silently criticising YHC with extreme prejudice.

    Thanks for posting this morning! Jville

    Announcements:
    Hammers and Ales (click for link).
    3rd F Bible Study Series at Gridiron starts Oct. 13. Arrive at 0645 to participate.
    Prayers to Las Vegas victims and families, residents of Puerto Rico, and all those affected by those tragedies.

  • Recap of F3RVA’s Third Anniversary Convergence

    The 3rd Anniversary Convergence was a double-dip extravaganza to celebrate three years of F3RVA.  Thirty-nine (39) of the faithful gathered in the darkness at 0600 at GridIron, and forty-three (43) of the faithful, plus seven (7) FNGs — fifty (50) in all — gathered at 0700. By my number-cruncing, it added up to 60 different people posting at one or both workouts, with 10 posting early and not late, 21 posting late and not early, and the balance double-dipping.  It was a perfect early autumn morning, and the grass, sand, and pavement were bathed in chilly morning dew, which we promptly began rolling around in (and face-planting into).

    0600 RECAP —

    ChumBucket took the initial Q on the GridIron with the PAX occupying most of the west half of the football field in almost complete darkness.  Chum gave a brief disclaimer, and led the following warmup sequence: Invisible Jump Ropes x 25, Don Quixotes x 20, LBCs x 30, Carolina Dry Docks x 15, Imperial Walkers x 20, Helicopters x 20, and Arm Circles x 15 (forward and reverse).

    Hand-off to Rosie, who ran the centerpiece of the early workout — a terrible-awful Charles Bronson, followed by one leg of a merican beast.

    Hand-off to WhiteDeer, who ran wheelbarrows from one sideline to the other, and then back again.  He then ran a boat/canoe series that must have been very effective based on vocal grumble-chatter coming out of the PAX.  Or maybe he ran the boat/canoes first.  All I know is that he was liberal with his constructive (??) criticism of others as to their form.

    Brief rapid-fire Mary ad hoc by ChumBucket to permit Johnsonville to retrieve a record-keeping pad from his sporty Camry (no, TYA, that does not constitute “clipboarding’).  Mary series included Hello Dollys x 15, APDs x 15, Box Cutters x 15, and LBCs x 15 with some leg lift holds in between.

    Number-a-rama, Name-a-rama, and COT with Wilson taking us out.  I suppose “Hey God, it’s me, Wilson …” is better than “Hey God, it’s me, Sugar Sock …”

    0700 RECAP —

    Johnsonville took the initial Q briefly in the center of the 50 yard line. The COP stretched from sideline to sideline. He gave a brief disclaimer, and started the fun with 25x SSH, 10x mericans, and 20 hillbillies.

    Hand-off to Phonics, who continued the warmup with a machine-gun COP.  I have no recollection what Phonics did, but he claims it was as follows:

    10 Lunges IC
    10 Don Quixotes IC
    10 Helicopters IC
    10 Ball Dippers
    Plank-O-Rama which included
    10 Carolina Dry Docks/Merkins IC
    10 Angles Knee Jumps IC
    10 Side Elbow Planks Hip Dips
    10 Inverted Alabama Prom Dates IC
    10 Side Elbow Planks Hip Dips
    10 Rotating Elbow Planks IC
    10 Foot to Hand Mountain Climbers
    10 Carolina Dry Docks/Merkins IC (End of Plank-O-Rama)
    20 LBCs IC
    20 Freddie Mercuries IC
    5 Burpees on your own

    Hand-off back to Johnsonville who introduced small group leaders, Offshore, Spit, WeddingSinger, and the HoneyDo/Upchuck team and divided the PAX into respective teams. For the next 45 minutes, the four teams rotated through each of the following for stations:

    • Station 1 (pavilion behind playground ~ Offshore’s team started here) —  Alternate between Dips and Abyss merkins between picnic tables.  PAX rotates around outside of picnic tables doing 5 two-count dips in cadence, then rotating to the next spot. When several men get to a spot in the rotation, they go inside for 5 one-count abyss merkins instead of dips.
    • Station 2 (volleyball court ~ Spit’s team started here) —  Jacob’s Ladder (bear crawling) – Start at one side of the volleyball court, bear crawl to the other side, complete one burpee, bear crawl back to the other side, complete 2 burpee. Rinse and repeat till completing 7 burpee (or the whistle is blown).
    • Station 3 (track area ~ Wedding Singer’s team started here) — 1/4 mile sprints/runs, with no man left behind, meaning everyone goes back to get the six when they complete their lap. 20 count between laps. continue until whistle blows.
    • Station 4 (front of school ~ HoneyDo’s team started here) — Donkey Kicks (ladder or fixed count) — Run around loop.

    Regroup in center of GridIron field for brief closing COP with Johnsonville leading Mary consisting of mountain climbers and pickle pounders.

    Number-a-rama, Name-a-rama, and COT with Attila taking us out

    MOLESKIN:

    [FROM JOHNSONVILLE]  It was an incredible honor and privilege to organize this event and to pull together some of our best leaders from around F3RVA to showcase what we do day in and day out.  Each of the leaders contributed their part of these workouts, and I thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity to get a double-dose of gloom.  Thank you all!

    Particular thanks goes out to Hardywood for organizing a fantastic catered breakfast from http://eggheadrva.com/.  The food was excellent, and the catering was very convenient.  Please do not forget to consider EggHeadRVA for your breakfast catering needs!!  Also, please do not forget to reimburse Hardywood if you reserved some food.  

    Guinea, being rather scholarly despite how he may come across, informed me of the actual definition (not urban dictionary definition, mind you) of “merkin.”  See here if you dare.   At least in my mind, that is not quite in sync with F3 ideals and culture.   As you probably know, the name of the common F3 exercise derives from “American-style Push-up,” or, if you happen to be a Bush or from the South, ” ‘merican-style.”  I suggest we spell and pronounce it Merican.

    [FROM UPCHUCK] Nice work this morning fellas and Pinkie. Way to dominate the 4 stations.  Hats off to FNGs Banner and Shrek. Way to push through a tough set of donkey kicks and WWII sit ups. Those are unforgiving.

    Gomer Pyle provided his usual energy this morning providing a fine example of how to crawl, get sandy, and do burpees. Well done. YHC Peyton Manning has to give some feedback to Hardywood Brad Paisley on the abyss mericans. Not quite perfect form. Almost there. Close. Basically, almost there.

    Luckily, Hardywood redeemed himself by organizing the finest of breakfasts. Yum, yum. Thanks to Nate for doing the cooking. TClaps on that aioli. What a pleasure to lead this fine group. Way to push through hour 2. Great showing in the gloom this morning, gentlemen!

    [FROM OFFSHORE]: YHC was continually haunted by “If you can’t Q it, don’t do it” because of being smoked by the preceding leaders’ exercises, the difficulty of the stations, and the ability of the PAX in his group to just crush the exercises. The Q often found himself as the six and Splinter, Mulder, and Phonics routinely led the PAX. Many thanks to Jville for organizing an epic beatdown.

    Respectfully, Johnsonville

  • Many Regulars take a Vacation from GridIron

    Two of the faithful posted at GridIron in the driving rain, while most of the regulars decided that they deserved a cozy respite. Johnsonville took Q, thus completing his SOJ leadership duties. This is what went down:

    Warmup COP with 50x ssh, 50x LBC, 10x merkins, 25x crab cakes, etc.

    Mosey to gridiron for beast with
    burpees
    burpees
    monkey humpers
    WWII situps
    burpees
    flutter kicks

    Mosey to track. 1/4 mi. intervals. rinse and repeat several more times.

    Mosey to front of school. Descending merkin ladder.

    Mosey to VSF. COT with Attila taking us out.

    Coffeeteria.

    YHC contemplated a full burpee beast, but put that back in the lineup so that we can get full, or nearly full, participation. I hope everyone enjoyed their travels and rest, because it’s only a matter of time….

    Great job, Attila! Thank you all for giving me a chance to lead during SOJ week. Jville

  • MudFace FartSacks his Own Back Yard

    Six of the faithful posted at #MannDate on a dark, humid morning with kettlebells in hand. Johnsonville, visiting from southside, took the Q and this is how things went down, more or less:

    THANG:

    Extended warmup with 50x ssh, 50x LBC, 50x arm circles front, 50x arm circles back, pickle pounders, and crab cakes

    DORA (extended) pairing up, with one man running the parking lot loop (about 230m I would guess) and one man performing the kettlebell exercises. Once the runner returned, the pair flip flopped maintaining aggregate counts. The DORA exercises were:

    50x sit and press
    100x lawnmower pulls
    150x goblet squats
    200x two arm swings
    250x tricep press
    300x halos

    COT with YHC taking us out.

    MOLESKIN:

    It was good to visit a new AO, especially one at the opposite end of RVA from YHC.

    MudFace had been talking up #MannDate months, claiming that the #CircusMaximus PAX had a lot of catching up to do to rival #MannDate’s intensity. YHC was excited to come up to MudFace’s back yard and see that intensity first hand. The PAX was eager and welcoming, and certainly delivered an awe-inspiring level of intensity. But, all of that intensity was delivered sans MudFace.

    Emoji said that he heard Mudface was planning to watch a Twilight marathon on A&E the night before. I guess that must have been pretty scary with all those scantily-clad vampires running around making out with each other. In any case, MudFace stayed in the old FS.

    All in all, it was a good road trip and a great morning feel the F3 gloom. See ya in the gloom.

    Jville

  • A Bad Day to Forget Gloves at Punisher

    Six of the faithful posted to Punisher this morning on the first of seven days of the southside takeover special event. Johnsonville took Q, and this is what went down, more or less:

    THANG:

    COP
    slaughter starter (20 burpees)
    50x ssh
    50x LBCs
    Merican countdown (10x wide mericans , 9x regular, 8x diamond, 7x wide, etc. to 1x)
    arm circles 20x front, 20x back

    mosey onto grass out front for COP
    25x pickle pounders
    25x imperial walkers
    25x partner leg tosses
    25x crabcakes

    native American run clockwise around school to bus loop
    classic curb crawl up to 5 and back to 1
    plank sequence

    mosey to basketball court.
    from end line, crab walk to far end line
    feet-first crab back.
    plank sequence

    mosey to soccer field
    elevens along length with mericans and LBCs

    native American run clockwise around school to big brick wall out front
    20x donkey kicks against wall
    bunny hop about 40 yards to other side of lawn
    karaoke back and forth

    Mosey to SF.
    Ring of Fire

    COT with Saab taking us out.

    MOLESKIN:

    We started off with a slaughter starter and ended with a ring of fire. The stuff in the middle was not any easier, but it was 100% tried-and-true F3. We were on our hands much of the morning. Offshore forgot his gloves (or maybe his wife finally threw them out). It was a bad day to go gloveless, and I could feel some hate coming my way…

    Welcome back Saab, who has been nursing a knee injury. Saab was not 100%, and he modified some, but I glad he made it out. It was good to meet Dexter for the first time. It was good to catch up with men I have not seen in a while.

    CHum Bucket did not appear on his home turf this morning. Perhaps he is traveling. I considered moseying the pax over to Chum’s house to give him an 0535 wake up call. A fear of Mrs. Chum led me to shy away from that course.

    Great way to kick of the Southside takeover week! Good work, Men.

    Jville

  • Circus Maximus PAX Buys a Cow to Ride on

    Five redwoods posted at Circus Maximus on a comfortable, but somewhat humid morning in the west end. Johnsonville (YHC) took Q with Mudface as the official timer. This is what went down:

    COP warmup with SSH, mericans, LBCs, Alabama prom dates, arm circles, 10x burpees.

    “Mossy” over to the midpoint on the Circus Maximus bus loop.
    10 right hand KB snatches OYO
    10 left hand lawnmower pulls on curb in cadence
    rinse and repeat 4 times.

    “Mossy” to the end of the bus loop.
    10 left hand KB snatches OYO
    10 right hand lawnmower pulls on curb in cadence
    rinse and repeat 4 times.

    “Mossy” over on the sidewalk adjacent to the school.
    10x burpees OYO
    10x balls to the wall in cadence.

    “Mossy” to 3 foot brick wall. 10x derkins in cadence.

    “Mossy” along drive in front of school to about the midway point.
    line up on sidewalk. Flutter kick and, one by one, death crawl along sidewalk to doorway, do 20 mericans, and death crawl back. Rosalita until PAX completes.

    Mary with boat/canoe, sit and press in cadence, more rosalitas, and box cutters.

    “Mossy” back to VSF. COT with Attilla taking us out.

    The self-proclaimed intellectuals at CM discussed the frequent use of the term “mossy” in place of “mosey” in F3RVA backblasts. Knowin’ that F3 ain’t about book learnin’, I told them smarty pantses to “shut the f** up and focus on fitness. If they spent half as much effort on kettlebells and burpees, I would not have to listen to all of that bullsh**. Hopefully they learned their lesson.

    Jville

  • Preblast — F3RVA’s 3rd Anniversary Convergence

    Preblast — F3RVA’s 3rd Anniversary Convergence

    We launched F3 RVA at GridIron on September 20, 2014. To commemorate the 3rd anniversary of the launch, we will host a convergence at GridIron (click for map) on Sept. 30, 2017.

    The main event will be at 0700. As with last year’s anniversary convergence, we would like to drive the numbers way up. Please bring as many FNGs as possible. Go retrieve our stragglers. Don’t apologize to them for making them get up early — they need your intervention.

    As with last year, we will again have a Bonus Workout at 0600 for F3 regulars and those ready for an FNG baptism by copious amounts of sweat and grime.

    Charlottesville and Hampton Roads are welcome and encouraged to attend.

    I challenge our F3 region to create a circle of men at GridIron that completely envelopes one of the football fields.

    To echo Hardywood’s wisdom from last year:

    **If you are awesome and love America you will dominate both workouts.**

    See ya in the gloom! Jville