Author: Viral

  • ♫ We’ll Ride Down, Baby, In-to This (Redneck) Tun-nel of Love! ♫

    COP — Don Quixotes and other stuff
    Exercises — Some other namby pamby stuff that doesn’t matter
    Viral finally arrives!
    Dora 1-2-3 — Partner up. 100 Merkins, 200 LBCs, 300 Copperhead Squats – pace set running from 20 yards out to up to the top of the terrace of the top field and back.
    (Redneck) Tunnel of Love
    Myrtle Beach Tabata — Partner up. People’s Chair <-> Crabcakes 3x repeato
    SOJerkin Gym (Attila with the Q) — 10 Jerkins, 20 PLTs 2x repeato
    Quick Ring of Fire, then 1MOM (20 American Hammers OYO, Flutter Kicks, Homer-to-Marge)

    Mosey back to Goose’s flag. Numberama. Name-a-rama. EF Hutton took us out.

    NMS

    This morning, of one of the worst fears of life as an F3 Q actually happened to YHC. There is nothing SO BLINDLY TERRIFYING as knowing one has a Q and then missing one’s alarm, waking up and doing the math & realizing that outside of bending the time-space continuum, there is no chance one will make it on time.

    And one needs to get dressed.
    And one needs a water bottle, filled with water preferably.
    And one notices it is pouring so “don’t forget to bring a towel!”
    And WHERE THE F ARE MY KEYS?!?!?!?!

    As YHC drove at a breakneck pace up Chippenham/Parham (contrary to popular myth, Henrico County doesn’t wall off the West End Fancyboys from SOJers after dark) he felt like Matthew McConaughey in Interstellar — trapped in a fourth dimension just beyond the communication of anyone . Text after text with no response.

    Right now they are wondering who’s Q.
    Right now they are moseying away from the flag.
    Right now they are proclaiming a pox on all of SOJ!

    Once YHC finally arrived on the scene. The PAX was gracious to yield the Q back to YHC. For as terrible as YHC felt about his late arrival, the PAX jumped right in behind. Gotta love this group!

    In a move that might have strained YHC’s already tenuous endearment to the PAX, after repeatedly jumping over a looong deeeep puddle right at the base of the terrace of the soccer field during Dora, the PAX lined up along the soccer field sloptrough for a quick trip or two through the Tunnel of Love.

    While YHC is prone to tall tales, YHC is not exaggerating in that the water was: 1) at least six inches deep, 2) probably full of goose crap and fertilizer run off, and 3) COLD.  YHC normally comes home with a goodly sum of grass clippings carried in his trousers, but today was a whole other level of muddy grossness.  Hope everyone enjoyed it as much as YHC. 😉

    Thanks to the PAX for letting us SOJers take over this week!

    Thanks to Flipper for humbly suggesting that 300 Lt. Dans wasn’t such a good idea.

    Thanks to Pucker for pinch hitting. YHC has dubbed thee an honorary SOJ Redneck of the Roundtable. Find your nearest Walmart or Cabelas to pick out your first Realtree camo shirt free of charge. Tell store security Viral sent you!

    Let’s get viral!

  • Keep Carrying the Flag

    Shovel Flags

    12 beasts met in the gloom to carry the shovel flag with us at NoToll. Here’s how it went down.

    THE THANG
    Mosey with the flag to the nearest field. Plant the shovel flag and circle up:
    COP: 20 Side Straddle Hops,     10 Imperial Walkers, 10 Don Quixotes (Abe Vigoda style)
    COP Dealer’s Choice: 20 LBCs (Shakedown), Homer to Marge (Wilson), 10 Merkins (Viral)

    Mosey with SF to back corner field
    Modified Escalator – To honor Circle K’s dad (who Swirly said was a marine) the PAX ran half way across soccer field to do an exercise for each letter and ran back to the baseline adding an exercise each time (six times out and back)
    Merkins (10x)
    American Hammers (10x two count)
    Rosalitas (10x)
    Iron Mike {ball dippers} (10x two count)
    Newton’s Cradle (10x)
    E2K {oblique crunch} (10x each leg)
    Planks/ Al Gores for the six

    Mosey with SF to the parking lot
    Triple Check: First man pole smokers against the posts, second man does sideways bear crawls around the oval curb, third man sets pace by running to other end of the parking lot and back.
    Toga led abfest (not to be confused with Red Lobster’s Crabfest) for the hotdogs.

    Mosey with SF to the pavilion
    That’s A Deep Burn!:  Find a bench. 20 dips, 20 inclined merkins, 20 dips, 20 inclined merkins, 20 dips, 20 inclined merkins. OH, THAT’S A DEEP BURN!!!!

    Pass the Q to our resident SOJ Devil Dog Flashdance
    ♫ P-T-P-T-Ev-ry-Day ♫: Holding the flag, Flashdance led a cadenced run of two lines with call and response around to the back corner of the fields and then back to the starting point.

    Plank for the six, one last circle up for a quick Ring of Fire.

    Wilson took us out.

    MOLESKINE

    Last night Swirly texted Your Humble Correspondent and some of the other Qs today of the sad news about Circle K’s father. Loose Goose suggested that the Heartbreakers would be carrying the flag around some this morning in honor of Circle K and his dad. YHC thought that was a great idea and a fitting tribute. Circle K has been such a big part of F3RVA over the last two-plus years and we are all indebted to his dedication to the PAX. YHC lost his father 12 years ago and wishes he had a group of men like F3 to lean on at that time. Just an encouragement from someone who’s been through this — rally around Circle K and let him know how much the PAX appreciates him. F3RVA is better thanks to Circle K and by extension the influence of his father. See below for information on services.

    YHC hasn’t led a workout in a few weeks and was clearly knocking the rust off. The clear, concise direction from the Q wasn’t exactly as crisp as he might have liked. Starting out SSHs with an already winded voice was not the auspicious start YHC had hoped for. There were a few “um just start exercising” type beginnings in the COP. There was also a terrible execution of a Newton’s Cradle (a workout YHC had only read about on the Exicon) … sincere thanks to Toga for questioning the Q’s form on the attempted “exercise” and demonstrating a better and more robust alternative.  Spelling M-A-R-I-N-E with exercises was tougher than expected. The Exicon certainly bailed out YHC. “Iron Mikes” was a bit of a stretch, but everyone went with it, which YHC greatly appreciates.

    YHC was happy to be teamed with Tobit and Mr. Roper during the Triple Check, but there was a breakdown of communication at one point which left poor Tobit endlessly circling the oval like the last item on a baggage carousel. Please proceed to the Delta counter to reclaim your lost luggage, Mr. Roper.

    YHC’s thanks go out to Flashdance for volunteering to lead a “march” at the end of the workout. YHC could barely run at that point, and the added in singing made for what felt like a very looooooong run back to the starting point. No one seemed interested in belting out Johnny Cash for the Ring of Fire. YHC will take that as a good sign that the PAX was sufficiently smoked by the end.

    YHC sends his Cobains to Wilson for asking him to explain the concept of “Ghost Flag” to the PAX and then shutting him down when he needed a moment to collect his thoughts. YHC blames the lack of oxygen in his brain by that point.

    Swirly-style ATTA BABYS! to Clamshell, Sugar Sock and Cottonmouth for doing a great job this morning. Nicely done, fellas.

    ANNOUNCEMENTS

    Support Circle K – To support Circle K’s family and his father’s passing, Swirly has posted information on services this week to honor Circle K’s dad.

    SOJ Sunday Run – OffTheBooks is on the books. If you’d prefer not to break your ankles on the Buttermilk Trail, New run at 6am Sundays called “Off the Books” at Urban Farmhouse Coalfield/Woolridge areas … check the app.

    Cry Havoc and Let Loose the Hillbillies of Southside! – DaVille smoked F3RVA on their takeover last month … SOJ Takeover week starts August 7th! Check in with Rosie or YHC to grab a Q.

    #2Spooky4U – Rumor has it the Ghost Flag apparently made an appearance this morning over in DaVille! Thanks to Rosie for leading the charge.

    Puppy time! – Shakedown and his 2.0 (Crikey!) enjoyed MARV’s 2.0 workout at 7AM at Dogpile last week. Plan for 2.0s on the third Saturdays every month at Dogpile. YHC humbly suggests if the workout goes on the books it be named “PuppyPile.”

  • Don’t Forget To Bring A Towel!

    12 mighty men showed up in the middle of a blinding rainstorm for lots of splashing, grunting, lying and mutual mockery at 45 Minutes of Mary. Here’s how it went down:

    Mosey to corner of Grove & Westmoreland

    COP (In Cadence): SSH 20x, Don Quixote (Abe Vigoda) 10x, Arm Circles forward/backward/small/big 5x, 10 Hand Release ‘Mericans, 20 LBCs

    Splash through the puddles to the paved area by the track on the other side of the school

    Double-Dora 1-2-3
    Partner up, then partner with another set of partners. One team knocks out exercises while other runs.
    Stage One: 100 ‘Mericans, 200 LBCs, 300 squats :: plank for the six
    Swap partners just like a West End Lasagna Party
    Stage Two: 100 Carolina drydocks, 200 crabcakes, 300 jump squats :: Al Gore for the six

    Puddle of Love: Tunnel of Love, just with 100% more puddles

    Triple-Check: Balls to the wall, World War II Sit Ups, Runner sets pace by running across paved area to fence and back. Six inches for the six.

    Mosey to basketball courts for a quick layup circuit, then circle up for quick Ring of Fire

    Mosey back to the flag where we found it had fallen over in the rain. Two minutes of burpees as penalty.

    Three of minutes of Mary: Dead cockroaches, LBCs, Alabama Prom Dates, Superman

    Numberama, Namarama, YHC took us out.

    Announcements:

    • Saab can’t abide suboptimal gas mileage, so his clown car for Week 2 of the Charlottesville Launch is full. Get in touch with Saab if you want to get a second car set up so he can slipstream you the entire drive to save on some gas money.
    • All The June 10th!
      • Get in touch with Phonics to join the Cornhole & Rock n Roll fun to benefit ReeseStrong.
      • Fudd is also hosting a party (M’s invited) at his house that night. RSVP to his preblast.
    • Thursday lunch at noon:
      • Downtown at Pops Market (if not it’s at Wong’s across the street).
      • Short Pump at Whole Foods … be sure to price check those organic Tomatoes!
    • Memorial Day Convergence on Monday! See HoneyDo’s preblast for more details, but be ready at 6:30AM sharp at Belle Isle parking lot. [Map]

    NMS

    While TYA has brainwashed us into believing that it is perpetually sunny and 70 in F3RVA, there’s always a little excitement and apprehension driving to a workout in the middle of any ridiculously stupid weather. Your Humble Correspondent drove through a monsoon to get to 45MOM and wondered how many people were as stupid as he? These are the sorts of workouts that YHC always remembers most … the cold ones, the snowy ones, the slushy ones, the torrentially soggy ones … no one remembers a Beast in 55 degree weather on a clear fall morning. These are the sorts of workouts that make us the men we are striving to be … well done all!

    Upon arrival, the rain was coming down in slow but very fat drops and no one was anxious to get out of their car. As YHC went to plant the shovel flag, YHC walked by Sabotage in The Brooklyn Beamer (probably listening to Flute Loop) and he rolled his window down and asked “Hey yo, we’re all just going to Denny’s … … right?” YHC won’t say he didn’t think about it …

    The rain really started pounding down and it was time to mosey. There was lots of mumblechatter from the PAX about not using the pavilion for the COP and the rain intensified. Doesn’t the PAX know that such complaints always seal their doom? Like any good Q, YHC then decided to ensure maximum soakage by making sure we had time for some work on our six in the COP and some super soggy Hand Release ‘Mericans.  Dear PAX, YHC will always cherish your howls as rain lashed down during LBCs. Later on, the Tunnel Puddle of Love was just icing on the cake, although Bleeder pointed out he probably would have done it first just to get everyone to hate him. Not sure who did it during the PoL but someone(Swirly? Bleeder? Grunt?) was doing their best to remove a whole arch of the tunnel by forklifting it from underneath. YHC didn’t see … did it work?

    The rain started letting up during during the Double Dora, but since the AO is so flat, the standing water all over was amazing, huge sections of the running track turned into lakes, especially the side by Commonwealth Street. YHC is pretty sure TwoCan was ready to get out his water skis on our laps around the track.

    Other than YHC chirping “Don’t forget to bring a towel!!” during Triple-Check, YHC didn’t get to hear much mumblechatter so please call it out in the comments. Partially it was because of the rain, partially because YHC took some prescription cough medicine before arriving and partially because YHC blocked out Toga questioning YHC’s virility during “six inches.” It’s okay because Toga is just getting in as much mockery as he can before moving The Togas to Nashville at the end of this summer. Be sure to give Mr. Grumpy your best barbs before he leaves us to get the Nashville PAX in line with Corporate’s high standards.

    Great job everyone! Viral Out.

  • Oh the People Will Come, Swirly

    14 strong (including one PAX from Charleston!) posted right at dawn at our old faithful friend WDog, here’s how it went down:

    Mosey to the flower pots on the front of the Carillon for COP

    COP: SSH 25x, DQ 20x (Abe Vigoda style), Russian Soldiers 20x, Merkins 10x, LBCs 20x

    THE THANG

    Luggage Carousel Triple Check: Station 1 (far circle): Sideways declined bear crawls, Station 2 (Ha’penny Stage): WW2SU Pace: Run between stations Repeato 3x, Plank for the six

    Quad-Splitter Triple Check: Station 1: Lt Dans, Station 2: Jump Squats, Pace: Lunges from flower pots to Carillon steps, run back, Al Gore for the six

    Mosey to the Amphitheater

    Escalator: One dip and one incline merkin for every step, adding one rep all the way to the top of the amphitheater.

    Mosey back to the flag

    Three Minutes of Mary: 20 Rosalitas (OYO) then six inches, 20 LBCs (OYO) then six inches, 20 American hammers (IC)

    Numberama, namarama, Singer wanted to take us out.

    NMS

    So the mystery of yesterday’s the vanishing Q signup was solved when YHC arrived at the AO. TYA told this writer that he was the culprit due to some inadvertent Google Sheets shenanigans and a glaring hole in Sheets not keeping much “Undo” history. TYA seemed a little down on himself and his spreadsheet skills. Chin up friend! You’re still YHC’s go-to Big Data guy!

    The PAX seemed to be cutting it close but at five minutes to the start, Swirly was getting a little antsy that people were not On Tom Coughlin Time. But just then, the headlights started lining up the road like at the end of Field of Dreams.  Hmm .. Field of Dreams … that’s probably another movie Hardywood hasn’t seen … who by the way bragged before the start that the last movie he saw in the theatre was the brutal Failure to Launch; a hamhanded rom-com starring Matthew McConaughey & Sarah Jessica Parker and Terry Bradshaw for some dumb reason. Raise your hand if you are shocked that Hardywood’s last movie he saw in a theatre involved Wooderson. Alright alright.

    We knew it was time to mosey when Circle K arrived, giving him his needed 15 seconds to apply rouge and get his hair did.

    The PAX seemed to not enjoy the quad beatdown – especially those who posted yesterday at Toga’s Form Gestapo Spectacular. With cones and paperclipped workout directions (NOW DO 3 PUSHUPS!) being dropped around us like care packages in a war zone by the pay-to-players, YHC moved us over to get some shoulder work in the amphitheater. Flipper suggested that might be the first time we’ve ever done an escalator with so many individual workouts all the way. YHC will take his word for it, because apparently “Big Data sees” that ol’ Flipdog has been upping his game.

    At the stroke of 6AM our pay-to-play friends took off like Brightly Bedecked Bats out of Planet Fitness Hell through their Family Circus style backyard shenanigans. Meanwhile, Swirly was finishing his merkins and stewing … maybe even pacing back and forth like a tiger in a cage with so many fitness tourists in the area. As the P2Pers passed by running backwards in the near circle, TYA tried his best to call up from the amphitheater and be helpful in the middle of a set of 16 merkins. TYA kindly informed the P2Pers that they could run faster if they ran forward instead of backwards. Northerners …

    Speaking of northerners, during the escalator YHC was able to get Saab on the therapist’s couch about his New Jersey roots. If you see him at an AO anytime soon be sure to ask him about his deep pride and respect for his home state of New Jersey.

    Lastly, welcome to our new friend Turtle who is up from Charleston for business and decided to get in a work out with the Richmond PAX. Charleston, you were represented well by Turtle!  Not only did Turtle slay the work out, he refused to take any of the bait that THE Yankee Aggressor was chumming the waters with on Northern-Southern relations during the escalator. Any Brother Of The Gloom who takes an Uber to a strange park at 5:30AM and wanders around in the dark in hopes of finding his F3 brothers at the very least deserved a Q-Uber back to his appointed hotel by YHC. Well done.

    Nice work everyone! Y’all killed it out there!!

    Announcements:

    • Charlottesville starts this weekend.  TYA & Swirly are heading up this weekend so see them if you want to clown car. F3Charlottesville@gmail.com for more. Heads have been emotionally locked.
    • Craig Stadler has backed out of Wilson’s Charity Golf event and there might be an extra spot (or two). Please see ForeTheCause.org if you want to get in 18 for a great charity.
    • Congrats to Loose Goose on his new gosling. Get in touch with YHC if you want to take them a meal or see their signup schedule here.
    • Honeydo is getting geeked for a Memorial Day Convergence. All the Richard Kimbles you can handle, bro!!
    • TYA’s favorite charity event of the year is back! Reese Strong Cornhole & Rock n Roll!
    • Virgin Q week is June 26th. If you haven’t Qed before or haven’t Qed a specific AO, get to signing up and expand your Q Eskimo Brothers of the Gloom network!!

  • Hot Potatoes at the EBDB BnB

    A fearsome 18 posted for a glorious morning at the EBDB BnB (AKA NoToll). Here’s how the potato was passed.

    Mosey past the playground and circle up in front of the gate.

    COP: 20 SSH, 15 Imperial Walkers (IC), 10 Hand Release Merkins (IC), 25 WW2SU (OYO)

    Luggage Carousel (Viral): Mosey to the big parking lot and triple up. Partner #1 does sideways bear-crawls on the oval tree-planter curbs in the corner. Partner #2 sets up on the opposite corner and does declined sideways bear-crawls. Partner #3 sets running perimeter to tag next partner. Repeato 3X

    Triple Check (Mr. Roper): Mosey to near field. Mericans, WW2SU, runner sets the pace. Repeato 3X

    Love Field (McRib): Parner #1 sets pace, Partner #2 does: Polar Bear Crawls, Burpee Broadjumps, Lunges. Rinse, lather & repeat to other side of the field.

    FAN-tastic Four (Hardywood): Four corners on half the near soccer field. Start with 10 Mericans in the first corner, then 10 Rosalitas, then 10 WW2SU, then 10 Ball Dippers. Then 20 on second lap, 30 on third. No time for a FAN-tastic fourth lap.

    Mini-Jackpot (Flashdance): With just three minutes left, twice around the half soccer field and then 25 Mericans and 25 WW2SU waiting for the six

    Mosey back to the flag.

    COT: Numberama, Namarama, Wilson took us out

    NMS

    After listening to the F3RVA podcast a few weeks ago and being “lack of Hot Potato shamed” by Corporate, I thought it would be a nice idea to run point on a HP Q. Well, apparently someone at the home office wasn’t having it so YHC’s name was unceremoniously removed. Always super, Hardywood was ready to step in and signed up and planted the SF, but the early arrivers ahead of YHC were wondering why Viral had so grievously shirked his responsibilities?!?! His name was there a few days ago …  YHC blames Colonel Mustard with the Candlestick in the Library … or maybe it was Professor Pain with the iPhone in the Big Blue Truck …

    It was great to see Flatline out again in his tie-dyed spanx. Apparently Flatline went straight into the dirty clothes bin this morning to get a second set of derision after his Saturday debut of them. No sign of them sweet 1995 Timerland hiking boots though.

    The PAX was big and boisterous this morning at NoToll.  It was so big in fact that we barely had space on the spot YHC picked to circle up for the COP, made even more difficult by some LIFOs. Now that the Southside PAX has slipped the surly bonds of those highfalutin West Enders with their 50 Shades Darker Proper Form Lasagna Parties it’s good to see the PAX right back up to 18. #DRTF_Is_Real

    In YHC’s brain, the Luggage Carousel was going to be a smash but the unfamiliarity with the concept seemed to get it off to a rocky start. It also didn’t help that YHC totally botched who he was supposed to teaming with and messed up EF Hutton and Flashdance’s teams. Please accept this Cobain to all effected.

    As every HP seems to wind up being, every QIC brought their fastball and the running elements were involved in every activity this morning leaving everyone out of breath. Thank goodness Rosie was there to shorten (and thereby ruin) every single 10, 20 or even 55 count.  McRib SWAGs that we covered roughly 2.5 miles during the course of today’s workout.  Nice work to everyone! Marmaduke & Carmen San Diego you guys are killing it!! T-Claps!

    Welcome to Doner Kebab’s FNG Big Friendly Giant (AKA BFG). BFG is so named because apparently his wife is on the diminutive side. There was talk about naming our FNG Eskimo Brother (NSFWish) because DK knew his wife in high school (but never dated her), but as a long-time fan of FX’s The League, YHC shot that down despite much grumpy mumblechatter. Regardless, well done on a very hard first post, BFG! YHC also apologizes for not asking if there were any FNGs at the start. Looking to see you back again soon … from what I can tell you will fit right in!

    Announcements:

    • Charlottesville starts this weekend.  See Lab Rat to either intervene with his BlackOps launch or help out.
    • Craig Stadler has backed out of Wilson’s Charity Golf event and there might be an extra spot (or two). Please see ForeTheCause.org if you want to get in 18 for a great charity.
    • Congrats to Loose Goose on his new gosling. Get in touch with YHC if you want to take them a meal or see their signup schedule here.
    • Virgin Q week is June 26th. If you haven’t Qed before or haven’t Qed a specific AO, get to signing up and expand your Q Eskimo Brothers of the Gloom network!!

  • Rat Farts, Tomatoes & Bestiality

    13 oaks met at the Carillon for a Bleeder style beatdown. Swirly lent YHC a SF for the planting. It might have been rainy and in the 50s, but the mumblechatter from the PAX sure made it feel like it was 70 and sunny here in RVA (booya).

    COP

    25 SSH, 25 Russian Soldiers, 5/5 Arm Circles (backward, then forward), 10 Merkins, 20 LBCs

    THANG

    • Burpee Circle to Circle Dora 1-2-3: 100 Merkins, 200 American Hammers, 300 Flutterkicks. Runner goes between circles and does 1, then 2, then 3 burpees at every lightpost for each century of the Dora. Plank/AlGore between sets.
    • Triple Check @ back wall of Carillon: (1) Run to picnic tables / ha’penny stage (2) LBCs (3) BTTW
    • Bestiality Hill: First set – Alligator Walk, Bear Crawl, Crab Walk, Duck Walk :: 20 Merkins :: Second set – Alligator Walk, 20 Lt. Dans, Bear Crawl, 20 Thor’s Hammer, Crab Walk, 20 APDs, Duck Walk, 20 Ball Dippers

    Mosey back to the flag. Numberama, namearama, announcements, YHC asked Singer to take us out but YHC really did it.

    NMS:

    Apparently winning BB of the week might be about shock value of the title, so we’ll see if this one gets any play with Bleeder & Co. Great to see Honey Do out in the gloom after his late night at the Reba concert last night with his 2.0. The rain held off just long enough to get the PAX out of bed and ready for a beatdown but the skies opened during the COP and Dora. YHC could not stop thinking about the RAT FARTS! scene in Caddyshack. The PAX should be worried about Circle K’s career chances as a meteorologist … did anyone hear him scream “it’s 70 and sunny, baby!!!” in the midst of the deluge? Based on a text from Goose, he wasn’t pleased that the burpees went UP the ladder instead of DOWN.  Sorry Goose but that was the point.

    While the rain kept YHC from asking the PAX do to step ups on those massive planters out front of the Carillon, we had some math issues in building triple check teams. Maybe we can get Abacus to host a 2nd F counting event soon?

    Bestiality Hill was an on-the-fly change because some hothouse tomatoes were taking shelter from the weather in the amphitheater. Rather than force them to listen to our grunts and groans on the steps, YHC remembered Sippy’s ABCD of pain down Love Hill and thus Bestiality Hill was born.  The ABCDs weren’t getting the desired effect so adding the exercises in between sure seemed to. By the way the PAX were howling during some of those interval exercises on the second set, I’m sure the tomatoes over in the hothouse were shocked and appalled at the grunts regardless.

    YHC never sleeps well the night before a Q and last night YHC was particularly grumpy which didn’t change when getting up this morning. Even so, it’s hard to be grumpy when you pull into the parking lot and see the PAX. YHC started with his first F3 workout about two years ago on a frigid February morning at 45MOM and YHC vowed he’d never go back.  It’s been a long way to get to the point where YHC is actually Qing events but every time YHC enjoys it a little more. Shout out to the PAX for having fun in some less than ideal weather. Thanks to the PAX for following YHC and giving it your all, it’s always an honor to lead. Shout out to Swirly for keeping at it while he gets back up to full speed, way to go! Shout out to Love Seat and Bunny Slope as you guys are coming along quickly and your game is strong!

    ANNOUCEMENTS:

    Operation CSAUP
    Good luck to the Belmonte team! If you want to run in mud or be a “trash bitch”, see Toga (Ragnar).  Be sure to talk to TYA if you want to run 20+ miles on the flattest pavement the east coast has to offer (SMR).

    Thursday Lunch Crew (12PM)
    Downtown: Bleeder & Crew @ Wong Gonzalez / Pop’s Market (it’s the city, figure it out yourself)
    Boonies – Loose Goose @ Short Pump Whole Foods (come for the salad bar, stay for the tomatoes)

    HDHH @ Splinter’s 3/15: Ms and 2.0s welcome. RSVP on the sheet or you only get the burgers that fell between the grates.

    Opus’s Song: Opus wrote, recorded and shared a song about saying goodbye to his sad clown. Opus, proud of you brother for putting yourself out there like that!!!

  • I Made Em Extra Schloppy For Ya

    Ten brave souls ventured out into the the downright balmy 37º pre-dawn gloom for a slushy and extra schloppy good time.

    Mosey to the circle on the near side of The Carillon for COP

    20 Slippery SSH (IC), 10 Donny Qs (IC), 5 Arm Circles, then big, then reverso(IC), 10 Merkins (IC), 20 LBC (IC)

    Mosey to the stage of the amphitheater
    Tabatas: LBCs then squats lunges, 4X
    Three corners: Using the “three corners” of the amphitheater we did four sets. Plankarama & Gore-a-rama between sets.

    • 10 burpees, 20 merkins, 30 LBCs
    • 15, 25 merkins, 35 LBCs
    • 20 box jump burpees, 30 merkins, 40 LBCs (IIRC?)
    • 20 jump squats, 30 Thor’s Hammer, 40 merkins ball dippers (IIRC?)

    Mosey to The Carillon for Partner Touch a Tree.  Peoples chair + 5 trees. Repeato.

    10 Merkin Ring of Fire to close it out.

    Numberama, Namearama, Splinter took us out

    Announcements: Be sure to check and RSVP to Circle K’s awesome Preblast of the Walking in a Winter Wonder CSAUP event coming up on 1/21.

    NMS: The PAX left right at 530 for the circle this morning, which meant we left some stragglers in dust cold fog. YHC refuses to mark Sippy as LIFO because his transportation is less reliable in snow than most.

    Finding good footing, staying off sheets of ice and avoiding massive 35º puddles was the order of the day.  Despite the sloppy weather, everyone was in great spirits throughout the workout. Is that a sign YHC didn’t put enough beat in the beatdown? Knowing there was lots of snow, ice, slush and puddles YHC thought staying in close might be the best strategy to prevent overly slushy shoes.  It partly worked for YHC.

    Qing and counting is still not second nature to YHC. That and a slushy brainfreeze didn’t help. So thanks for the prompts from the PAX today. “Can we recover?” “Wait .. lunges, not squats?” Saab’s response to YHC’s encouragement to make them deep lunges … “all six inches.” Hilarity ensued.

    The PAX got to pick workouts on the third and fourth rounds of the Three Corners. Offshore’s box jump burpee suggestion almost brought down slushballs on his head. Meanwhile, Hardywood greatly enjoyed YHC’s declaration on one of the last of the Three Corners that YHC “made ’em extra schloppy for ya.”

    LADY, YOU’RE SCARING US!

    Here’s to a less sloppy beatdown tomorrow. See you in the gloom!

  • Who Let the (Wild) Dogs Out?

    A PAX of four wild dogs (more on that later!) planted the shovel flag and ventured out into the pouring rain at Batteau on this sloppy and somewhat chilly morning. Here’s what I remember, with an assist from EF Hutton

    Mosey to COP on the tennis courts

    • SSH (x20 IC)
    • Don Quixote (x17 IC)
    • Arm Circles (x20 IC)
    • Merkins (x20 IC)
    • LBCs (x17 IC)

    THE VIRAL THANG:

    Mosey to bottom of the stone steps

    Perrito 1-2-3: One partner runs to up the three sets of steps (farmer’s market side) while partner performs exercise: Dips, Jump squats, Plank

    The Dog PAX (AKA The Peoples’ Blimp): Blimp down to the lake with individuals calling out exercises in a round-robin

    • Lunges
    • Three-legged Bear Crawl
    • Broad Jumps
    • Crab Walk
    • Duck Walk
    • Alligator Crawl
    • Backward Lunges

    Step ups at the picnic tables by the big rocks

    • 20 single step ups (OYO)
    • 17 “double” (top of table) step ups (OYO)

    THE EF HUTTON THANG: 

    Partner Carry back up THOIR

    • Partner Carry x2
    • Wheelbarrow x2
    • Broadjump Burpees

    Plankorama, then mosey to Stone House

    Partner Pee On a Tree x 5 Trees (3 Rounds)

    • Merkins
    • Monkey Humpers
    • Carolina Dry Docks

    Partner Dogleg Throws 2×25

    Mary (AKA The Doggy Bag)

    • Box Cutters (IC)
    • Alabama Prom Dates (IC)
    • Merkins (IC)

    COT, Name-a-rama, Number-rama and YHC took us out.

    MOLESKIN

    Wheelbarrow and EF Hutton were at the stone house and were rearing to go when Sippy Cup showed up right on time. Everyone was excited and ready to play in the rain, except of course for THE FERAL DOG LIVING IN THE WOODS  barking incessantly at the PAX.  EF Hutton said he saw a posted sign that said “rescue in progress.”

    ♫ Get back ruffy, get back scruffy. Get back you filthly flea-infested mongrel! ♫

    YHC didn’t see anyone actively attempting a rescue at 5:29AM on a rainy Monday in Forest Hill Park.  YHC didn’t get that close a look but the square-shaped head looked slightly boxer/pitbullish so YHC was only too happy to give the pooch a wide berth.

    While everyone did a great job, the MVP has to go to EF Hutton who partner-carried YHC’s sorry carcass up THOIR at an insane pace, zipping right by Sippy and Wheelbarrow.  As poet laureate Toby Keith once penned:

    EF Hutton might not be as good as he once was
    but EF Hutton is as good once as he ever was.

    While YHC is not exactly sure what is wrong with his foot, doctor’s say it is something called a “Morton’s Neuroma” and when acting up it feels like each step is stepping on a marble in your shoe.  Good times. After walking all over DC yesterday, YHC’s foot wasn’t feeling great and so YHC called EF Hutton while sitting in traffic on the way home last night to see if he could help split the Q. EF not planning to go but was obliging, though feeling rather salty as he was watching his Redskins implode before his eyes at that moment. Timing is everything.

    I also think the whole WILD DOG LIVING IN THE WOODS thing at Batteau has now officially joined it to Dogpile and WDog in the “Brotherhood of Canine-Themed Richmond AOs” if not in name, then in certainly in spirit.

    What a great job by this intrepid four! Special thanks to EF Hutton for helping share the load.  It was an honor to Q / 2!

    Woof woof woof-woof-woof!!

  • Get that WDog while it’s nice and cold …

    VQ week rolls in in Richmond with another VQ lamb being led to the proverbial slaughter.  17 Faithful showed up for a 37° morning at WDog for a chilly and damp beatdown.

    (more…)

  • HDHH: Loose Goose thinks the beer has gone bad at The Answer

    THE THANG: Drink good beer and fellowship at The Answer.

    The PAX were quite successful in their mission.  Well done to all!

    Here’s some notes on the night:

    Splinter and Toga were eagerly participating in THE THANG well before six.  YHC arrived shortly prior to the designated time and found them well into the workout already.

    Happy 40th to Loose Goose!  Goose now having trouble seeing small type and was overwhelmed by the scrolling HDTV beer lists behind the bar.  YHC bought Goose his first beer in celebration of the day, to which this scene from Can’t Hardly Wait played out almost word for word.

    Toga is the Johnny Cash of our PAX; he’s been ev-er-y-where, man for F3 workouts.  “Brother Trent” has been anointed with the laying on of hands in Jacksonville, he’s had his heels nipped by the Hate-Hates in Nashville.  There’s even a rumor Toga barely avoided a tune-up by insensitively using the phrase “Hate-Hate” at some youngins once.  Ah Millenials … apparently for the twentysomethings “Hate-Hate” is THEIR word, not ours, Toga.  Maybe we can see about donating a Lite Brite for their safe space?

    Rumor has it that many moons ago after TYA finished business school, he bicycled across the United States with his wife.  YHC has no confirmation whether they rode a tandem like the Doublemint Twins right over the Rockies but until proven otherwise that is how YHC will imagine it forever in his mind.

    Speaking of biking, Lab Rat is considering the 100 mile run/ 100 mile bike challenge in March, but needs some convincing.  YHC observed he might be self-conscious of showing up to class at VCU off his bike as not just “the old guy” but as “the old, stanky, sweaty guy” once the warmer weather comes in March. Courage, Lab Rat, courage …

    The PAX has noticed that Spinter’s hair is getting decidedly shaggy, much like Mattingly’s sideburns.  Will the coming of spring force Splinter to shed once he sees the shadow of his emobangs?  Stay tuned.

    Lockjaw was quite proud of his increased aptitude at counting from his VQ to his second Q.  As Lockjaw told YHC on sharing my hesitance to Q due to my athletic inabilities. “If you can count, you can Q!”

    Well said, Lockjaw.

    The PAX is very interested in what EF Hutton has up his sleeves for his Virgin Q at NoToll this coming Tuesday.  Come out and see for yourself!

    Keep an eye out for more AOs!  Lab Rat is eager to get a workout up and running in “Da Ville” (which confused everyone into thinking “C-Ville” because we forget Mechanicsville is a real place .. Godspeed on that one, dude) and Goose seems all fired to get someone else to initiate a Tuesday workout in the Pemberton/Quioccasin area… maybe Byrd Middle School?