Author: Whitesnake

  • We Care a Lot

    We Care a Lot

    Another Heavy Metal Kettle in the books with a record 20 attendees. This annual rock festival keeps getting bigger! Here is this year’s setlist and exercises:

    Shake Me: Cinderella. Warmups of something like IW, USoldiers, Copperhead Squats & Arm Circles. Also did some floor stuff.

    We Care a Lot: Faith No More. Side Straddle Hops and a burpee every time they say the song title: 21 total burpees

    Cherry Pie: Warrant. Curls during Chorus, Swings during the verse–“Swingin’ in the livin’ room, swingin’ in the kitchen, most folks don’t cause they’re too busy bitchin’”

    Smokin’ in the Boys Room: Motley Crue. On our six to do skull crushers during verses and smokers (anchored on your bell) during the verse.

    Seventeen: Winger. Sets of 17 overhead presses and 17 lawnmowers

    18 and Life: everyone but Joey Chesnutt and Mariner has to go to jail after singing Seventeen. On our backs to do sets of 18 presses and 18 hammers (2 count)

    Here I Go Again/Is this Love: Whitesnake. Triple check with the timer doing rifle carry to the curb and back and the other two in front of a car doing dolly’s and rosalitas holding the bell. No one got on a car hood but everyone looked sexy.

    Balls to the Wall: Accept. High Pulls and Balls to the Wall (toe taps).

    Foolin’: Def Leppard. Some Mary of LBCs, WW2, Heals to Heaven, Freddie Mercuries in cadence (onta gleeben glouten)

    Nothin’ But a Good Time: Poison. Attila complained about no Poison so I went to this classic and we did ten burpees to finish. Burpees are always a good time.

    Had 18 with wigs-on to start (2 wigs short of the 20 attendees), some got tired of hair in their mouth and face during the workout but most fought through it. Mr. Rogers and EF Hutton brought their own wigs and we had a handful of concert t-shirts (Black Sabbath, Slayer, Motley Crue, Rush, Whitesnake) which was a nice touch.

    Prayers for Pinto’s marriage and safety for their trip to Italy, Blue Moon’s trip to Germany and Pigskins return trip from Egypt. The Bridge coming 10/25 and 11/15. See Slack for details.

    Rock on everybody!

  • Kiss my grits!

    8 regulars and an FNG (Hospital Name Mel who is now known as Flo) did a tour around the Deep on a breezy Monday morning. After some warmups we went to the bus loop and did some walking LT. Dans and then some double polar bears until we got to the end of the covered bus pickup. We then partnered up and one partner did walking Ukrainian Soldiers while the other did 3 burpees and then ran to catch up to his partner to switch. We did this to the back fence. After walking through the fence, we got to the paved path and crab walked up the curved path to the blacktop.

    At the blacktop, we did two rounds of 4 corners. 1st time was 25 at each corner with WW2, SSH, Squats and Merkins. The second time we did 25 jump squats, 50 heals to heaven, 75 SSH and 100 LBCs. We then hit the swing set for a triple check of swing pumps, WW2 and a half lap timer.

    With a little time left, we moseyed to the front hill and ran up to the sidewalk and did 5 burpees. After a mosey to the flag, we did a quick Mary of LBCs, Hammers and Heals to Heaven.

    Gomer invited Flo and he kept up with the pax well and hopefully we see him again soon.

    Lunch Tuesday at Joey’s Hot Dogs.

    Thanks for letting me lead.

  • Flo State

    Twelve of Short Pump and Goochland’s greatest were in the zone, or at least tried to be, this Wednesday morning.

    We ran to a closed Wells Fargo for warmups. We only go when closed so they don’t open accounts for us without permission. Warmups included Helicopters, Ukrainian Soldiers, Imperial Walkers, DQ and Merkins. We then continued West searching for that flo state.

    Soon we were at the Progressive building and did a triple check of Flutters, Lieutenant Dans and the timer/runner doing ten Outlaws at the next light poll and running back. Everyone went with the FLO.

    We then ran, no yogging was involved, to the new 7-11. Its not open yet so we used the Slurpee drive-through lanes to do 7 HRM and 11 WW2s and then 7 WW2s and 11 HRMs.

    We then ran to the Nissan dealership and did a burpee at every white car–something like 15 total and headed home. We did a bus loop lap to get us to 3 miles and then a little Mary to end it.

    Announcements: Charlotte’s Lake Anna tree house is coming to life this weekend. Pictures coming soon. Lunch next Tuesday at Joey’s hotdogs at noon. The Bridge on 10/25.

    Thanks for letting me lead.

  • Yoda, Gump and Weird Al in a 3 way

    21 Weird Al fans came to see Weird Snake make his second appearance and do some routines to the following comedy song setlist:

    1. Headline News (Parody of “Mmm, Mmm, Mmm, Mmm” by Crash Test Dummies”)
      • Warmups of SSH, Ukrainian Soldiers, Helicopters and APDs–APDs while listening to the John Wayne Bobbit verse.
    2. Ebay (Parody of “I Want it That Way” by the Backstreet Boys”)
      • More warmups including arm circles, merkins, and others
    3. Gump (Parody of “Lump” by President of the United States)
      • Partner up. One runs like Forest and the other does Lt Dans
    4. 3-Way (The Golden Rule) by the Lonely Island
      • Triple check: Swings, Squats and the same run
    5. Lasagna (Parody of “La Bamba”)
      • Sextuple Lasagna party check of Swings, High Pulls and a different run (2 people each)
    6. Couch Potato (Parody of “Lose Yourself” by Eminem)
      • Finished off the Lasagna party routine
    7. Eat it (Parody of “Beat it” by Michael Jackson)
      • Two rival groups split up and lunged to each other and did Jazzercise during the chorus then lunged back and repeat. Only Bedpan is ready for Solid Gold Dancer tryouts
    8. Yoda (Parody of “Lola” by the Kinks)
      • Burpees every time you hear “Yoda”.
      • Don’t remember what kettlebell exercise we did (Single Cleans?) as we did over 25 burpees during the song
    9. 33 by Wolves of Glendale-Dedicated to the Hate (30’s) group
      • Overhead presses and Curls and Halos. Inspiring lyrics such as “When Greta Thunberg was 17, She was nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize, When I was 17 I got shot in the dick playing paintball” and “My mom is ashamed of me because I just turned 33”
    10. Fat (Parody of “Bad” by Michael Jackson)
      • Triceps and Sumo Squats
    11. Pretty Fly for a Rabbi (Parody of “Pretty Fly for a White Guy” by the Offspring)
      • Some Mary of LBCs, Heals to Heaven, some stretching, Hammers with the Bell and then ended with 5 burpees

    We learned today that Lighthouse and others don’t know the John Babbitt story. Someone needs to explain it at the Anniversary convergence this Saturday at 6:30 and Dogpile. Don’t tell that story at the Father Daughters dance on 10/6 and WEAG.

    Weird Al is in concert at the new amphitheater on 9/22. Ask Offshore for the best place to see it for free. I will be out of town and used this morning to scratch that itch. Thanks for letting me lead.

  • Lick my love pump

    This group went to eleven, including two drummers who may have combusted. Dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It’s just not really widely reported.

    We started by chasing Pigskin to Short Pump Park and then hit the pavilion for some additional warmups. Lighthouse requested 10 burpees and I obliged. After that start, we did helicopters and then arm circles (aka Green Hornet helicopters), then some heals to heaven, hammers and merkins.

    11 people partnered up somehow and we did 6 rounds of one partner doing a lap (without running into the repair fence) and the other doing an exercise: the 6 exercises were: dips, step-ups, LBCs, derkins, squats and dollies.

    We made it back to Poca, did 1-2 laps of the bus circle to hit 3 miles and then some Copperhead Squats and a ring of fire. Thanks for reading this far. It’s such a fine line between stupid, and uh…clever.

  • Bolt up!

    17 new Chargers fans and 1 happy Q celebrated the big win in Brazil. Wearing my powder blue jersey, I was ready to lead–and so was Tatar. But Tatar made another signup sheet error and had to watch me steal his football themed workout.

    We circled up at the 50 yard line (around the “T” that Tatar painted in the middle of the night) and did warm up exercises in 27 and 21 counts. It did not take Attila long to know the pattern was the score last night. We did SSH, IW, WW2, Hammers, Squats, Flutters, LBCs and others I cannot remember.

    We moseyed to the goal line and did my favorite football field exercise, the Double Quarter Pounder. 25 count at the 25, 50 count at the 50, 75 at the other 25 and 100 count at the other goal line–running to the exercise and bernie back to the start. We did 25 merkins, 50 Squats, 75 flutters and 100 SSH. Second time we did 25 Hand Release Merkins, 50 single count hammers, 75 LBCs and 100 SSH. A group of volunteers with the help of bacon smelling cheater, were able to give me the Big Mac rap and so we did not do a 3rd round.

    Went to the side lot to spell BOLTS! 5 Burpees in the center and then as a group hit each corner, returning to do 5 Burpees in the center after each exercise. 50 Overhead claps, 50 single count Lunges, 50 Toe Taps, and 25 SSH and 25 Squats (as Blue Moon looked lonely doing squats on this own). Lots of walking by the pax. I knew they needed a way to push more.

    So we hit the lower field for some sled work. Broke off into 4 teams and one team pushed the football sled down the field while the other three groups did some sort of exercise (bad instructions were to blame). Polly seemed to enjoy the sled the most–maybe a Rugby and booze themed Q coming soon??? And even White Deer was seen angrily pushing that sled. No injuries occurred to the Pax or the Sled.

    Then for fun, we did 2 rounds of suicide runs (to the 10,20,30,40,50). Second round included one burpee at each “finish” line to ensure the pax touched the line before returning to the start (5 burpees total, stop your whining).

    We hit the bleachers next. After telling them how disappointed I was in their effort, we did 3 rounds of bench kicks and dips: 20,25 and then 30. We then moseyed to the soft playground area for some Mary, including some super slow LBCs, and got to time.

    Announcements: party at Taters starting at 4 for Gypsy and Pinto and their upcoming wedding (to other people). Firehouse Subs on Tuesday at noon. 11th Anniversary convergence on Sept 20th.

    Whose got it better than us???

    Nobody!!!

  • Took the long way home

    We ran through the Wellesley tunnel to the courts and did two rounds of 25 merkins, squats, WW2 and dips with 2 burpees between each exercise (20 total). Then Roger Roger led us the long way home. We did 4 miles (min) and went almost ten minutes over. Long way added about 0.8 miles—oops. Extra credit for everyone and ten demerits for me as Q.

  • WTH was wet & bussin’

    With Pax from the last four decades, this Q with no rizz took us down to the Wells Fargo for some warmups and then down Park Terrace for some neighborhood work. “Yeet” went Pinto as we hit four cul-de-sacs down Waycross and did 15 merkins, 15 jump squats and 15 heels to heaven at each. After Pinto’s weird flex we ran down Park Terrace some more and look a left down Huntwick Ct. After partnering up, one partner ran around a sus circle while the other did lunges and monkey humpers and at the time to switch, the other partner ran around a different sus circle (yes, there are two different circles here). We did two rounds of this and then a third round where we switched directions and did one round of your partner doing shoulder taps and plank jacks. I was shook watching Salt Lick re-enact how we got his name.

    We headed back and got to the flag on time with exactly 3 miles. No cap!

    No noob’s today and it is great to have pax in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s and 50’s. Everyone accepted the wetness and ate today. Pigskin and Lighthouse are in Europe and we still had ten. WTH used to be so basic but now it is fire!

  • 2001: A Hutton Odyssey

    Queue the music (Also Sprach Zarathustra by Richard Strauss), and Orson Welles narration

    2000 posts ago, an ape like creature named EF Hutton inhabited F3.

    (music & timpani builds)

    And EF Hutton stood and then ran

    (After a well deserved fartsack after post 2000, EF Hutton and eleven others went on a journey to Lake Lorraine/Glen Eagles.)

    (music builds, more timpani)

    Rosie, Sippy Cup, Blood Test, Honey Do, Viral, Swirly, Bleeder join the scene with Hutton and discover “something”

    Our Forefathers

    (music and Forefathers climax, then nap)

    History of F3, Part I.

    You’re welcome.

  • COVID Testing

    Five kids and me showed up to The Deep to pass two COVID tests and also show that they count down from ten. Big accomplishments!

    The COVID tests were in honor of Tater. The company he works for used to be a COVID testing expert and Tater also has COVID–a new company benefit?

    After some warmups we did our first COVID test: 20 Calf raises, 20 Overhead presses, 20 V-ups, 20 incline merkins, 20 decline merkins. We passed.

    We then took a left down Graham Meadows Drive and starting with the first driveway on the left did ten merkins, then nine squats at the next driveway, then eight merkins, etc. After we finished, we then moseyed a little closer to the cul-de-sac for a triple check. Runner ran around the cul-de-sac and back, other two did flutters and reverse crunches. When that was done we moseyed a little of the way back, found a driveway and did ten HRM, then nine Squat jumps at the next driveway, etc. All the way back up the hill, almost back to the school.

    We moseyed to the old Nuckols Farm house for a triple check of touch-a-tree. Partner #1 did burpees and Partner #2 an elbow plank. The pax was very happy with me at that point.

    Moseyed back to the school and the six of us found a pole and we did two rounds of pole smokers while the first in line did ten merkins and ran to the front. That was fun…Then we went back to the parking lot for another COVID test in cadence: Crunches, Overhead claps, V-ups, Imperial Walkers & Dead man hang. Anyone know another “V” exercise? We all passed again!

    Hope Tater is feeling better soon. We almost got 1.5 miles in today in the 75 degree humid morning. We will have a few more mornings like this coming. Be safe everyone.