Author: Dr Tryhard

  • The Mounted Hundo

    Nine HIM’s welcomed a blood red sunrise at the Forge with the following beatdown to end all beatdowns:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Variable Mosey around to the wall
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • Donkey Kick-offs (got up to 20)
    • Circle up for the usual DTH reps IC

    THE THANG:

    • Old 100 on Mt Chaplain
    • 100 reps at the bottom, 90 top, 80 bottom, 70 top, ….down to a 10 burpees finale
    • First man to complete reps calls out and entire PAX stops to mosey
    • Plank or Hollow-Body Hold for the SIX
    • Variable reps of different exercises completed at each of SIX landings en route from top to bottom & bottom to top
    • There were lots of different reps
    • It was very difficult

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 9
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:

    • Last week the PAX was surprised when Chaplain didn’t use his namesake routine. Then the man no-shows for the hardest version of Mt Chaplain to date. We’re sensing Chap may not like his Mount very much after all. Great to have Flange back out after his winter hibernation, and T claps to Roger Roger for making the long trek down. As the PAX was completing their gruesome Old Hundo, trucks and vans started assembling in the lower parking lot, which Snuff expertly recognized as a film crew setting something up. Apparently Michael Keeton is in town and filming a series about the opioid crisis… YHC looked it up and it’s called “Dopesick”, and will show as a limited series on Hulu. Anyway, the PAX was totally ready for Batman to join us on Mt Chaplain. Maybe next time. 

  • Old Men Rule, Teenagers Drool

    The lush dry fields of NoToll welcomed a dozen dutiful gloom warriors to find the sunny and 70 side of self-discipline. The teenage soccer players cramping our parking lot space chewed on this juicy gossip during their sunrise practice:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:

    • Mosey down to Field 1
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • Usual DTH Warmerama

    COP #2:

    • 4 CORNERS (Prostitute Style)
    • Corner 1:  x10 Merkins
    • Corner 2:  x20 WWII’s
    • Corner 3: x30 Squats
    • Corner 4: x40 Freddie M’s (4-ct)
    • Front Runners return to bring the SIX home

    COP #3:

    • TRIPLE CHECK:
    • P1 – Bleacher Box Jumps
    • P2 – American Hammers
    • P3 – Runs across Field & Back

    COP #4:

    • 1 min Plank
    • 1 min Hollow Body Hold
    • Wilson’s Wife

    COP #5:

    • Line up & Space out to complete OVER UNDERS the length of the Field

    Mosey BTTF:

    • After the gate, complete BATTAN DEATH MARCH to the parking lot (In the format of an Indigenous Peoples Run, the Pax Lunged in Line while last man completed x5 Burpees, then ran to front)

    COT:

    • Counterama # 12
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:

    • Spring is in the air with weather warming, fields drying, and a group of sexy old men doing Broga in the pre-dawn light. Pretty sure S&M was on the menu…something about partner stretching with a belt… ? Anyhoo, the PAX welcomed Pyro from J’ville Florida in town for the week – YHC has apparently delivered him a memorable beatdown in the past. Also, Cooper adopted a deflated football for his entertainment and as usual, Fresh Prince was impossible to outpace. Funniest comment of the day was delivered by OC, in an effeminate teenage voice, “Good one, old man”, after YHC attempted a jovial comment to the soccer players they could join us for a warm-up. Had YHC in tears lunging back to the Flag. A pleasure and honor as always to lead you guys. SYITG, YHC, DTH

  • Taking the Blocks for a Walk

    The frozen tundra of Dogpile welcomed 15 warriors to test their metal in the furnace of another DTH beatdown. Here’s how real meal shed the slag:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:

    • Mosey to the Circle
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • Usual DTH-style warmerama routine

    COP #2:

    • Mosey to collect coupons at the Stage
    • Head over to the Bowl for a LINDSEY:
    • 30–>10 Squat Thrusters
    • Carry coupon between sides
    • 10–>30 Block Merkins

    COP #3:

    • Mosey down the forested back road to the Pump house, carrying coupons, stopping to complete x3 Block Burpees every time Q calls (maybe x5 sets total)
    • PUMP HOUSE TRIPLE CHECK:
    • P1 Al Gore Block Curls
    • P2 Block-on-Chest WWII
    • P3 Runs with coupon down to bridge, completes x10 Block Groiners, and returns to switch

    COP #4:

    • Mosey up pipe loop, carrying coupons, stopping for a brief set of Block Dips at the top waiting for the SIX
    • Rusty Cage – x2 Sets of x10 Pullups OYO
    • Return Coupons at the stage

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Final minute Merkin Ring of Fire
    • Counterama # 15
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • HARDYWOOD took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:

    • Twas a handsome gaggle assembled round yon Old Glory upon YHC’s delayed arrival. Apparently the little Nickel bridge was closed due to freezing, so YHC had to book it back around the highway to make the AO on time. Mumble chatter was aplenty until Body Builders was called, then there wasn’t even enough breath for keeping count. Hardywood saved the PAX from perpetual pain by accurately providing the final counts. Mumble chatter picked back up again as the PAX collected their coupons, but subsided quickly with a coupon-happy Lindsey in the bowl. Handshake decided that specific routine may have been the single hardest routine to implement in that moment …what he doesn’t know is that YHC has yet to introduce the PAX to Ascending Polar Bunnies…among other novel beauties waiting in the hopper. The PAX went on to keep their beloved coupons for a wee tour of the AO, and despite YHC’s best efforts, the joy of PAX Mumble Chatter won the day. Solid work brothers. Thanks to Hardywood for some closing words of wisdom. SYITG, YHC, DTH

  • DOUBLEHARD

    A dynamic duo didn’t succumb to the weatherman’s lies, and posted to the Forge to snuff out the flame of sloth and embrace the suck of self-discipline. Here’s what spontaneity produced:

    The THANG:

    THE DESCENT:

    • x10 Lunges ea light pole down to the culdesac

    CULDESAC MINI COP:

    • SSH, DQ’s, SquatWalkers

    THE ASCENT:

    • x3 Burpees ea light pole going back up, alternating Run, Bernie, Caraoke, or Bear crawl between poles

    ELEVENS:

    • Between bus loop curbs
    • 2-Count Am Hams 
    • Lt Dans
    • Lunge or Bearcrawl between sides

    MARY’s BOUDOIR:

    • Under the dry awning of the Middle School
    • DORA:
    • x100 WWII
    • x200 Pole Smokers
    • x300 Mtn Climbers
    • Moving partner uses the picnic table to complete x10 Dips and x10 Derkins (later switched to incline merkins)

    COT:

    • Counterama #2 + Cooper
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:

    • With the big ice storm predictions, YHC was anticipating a solo workout with Cooper, but Doublemint saved the day. YHC had completed a similar routine on Sunday AM having missed Dogpile, but Doublemint was handy with some painful augmentations. Mary’s Boudoir has proven useful once again as a dry spot during inclement weather, and today’s blustery freezing rain was certainly worthwhile escaping from. SYITG, YHC, DTH

  • Beatdown Deck + Bricks + Beats

    Five evaded the fart sack to bring sunny and seventy to the Forge. It was awesome, as follows:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:

    • Mosey down the lot and circle up
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • The usual DTH Warmerama while awaiting Fresh Prince

    COP #2:

    • Mosey back past the DTH mobile and retrieve the bricks, F3 deck, and speaker
    • Circle up at the 3rd lot, school side (near benches, steps, and rails)
    • With bricks in hand and beats thumping, the PAX completed x6 Rounds
    • Each Round:  x5 cards IC or OYO separated by either a run around the lot, Tooth Fairies on the steps, Bernie around the lot, or Jerkins in the bars.

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 5
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:

    • Today’s routine proved both simple and challenging – credit to the beatdown deck for delivering, as usual. Special thanks to Roger Roger making the trek down to SOJ. Cooper gave him a whole lotta love. And thanks to Bone Thugs providing some humorous mumble chatter in the absence of Hardywood’s usual effervescence. Thank you for letting me lead. YHC, DTH

  • IR Efforts & K9 Love

    NoToll welcomed 13 SOJ warriors and two poodle variety pups, none of whom are on IR, but all of whom enjoyed an IR-friendly workout. Here’s what embracing love and faithfulness looks like:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:

    • Circle up on the Basketball Court
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • Disclaimer #2 for those on IR to modify as needed while keeping the “Tryhard Rule” in mind – “It doesn’t matter what you do, just do something!”
    • Disclaimer #3 for those with dogs to bag up any landmines.
    • SSH x20 IC
    • DQ’s x10 IC
    • The Opus x10 IC
    • Russian Soldiers x10 IC
    • Elbow Plank Leg Lifts x10 ea side IC
    • Freddie M’s x10 IC
    • Kimchi Twists x10 IC
    • DR.W’s x10 IC

    COP #2:

    • Walk over to the Playground
    • Partner up to circumnavigate the Playground Curb 
    • P1 Curb Crawls while P2 completes x5 burpees, then switches with partner

    COP #3:

    • Walk over to the Bathrooms
    • Triple Check
    • P1 – Dips
    • P2 – Donkey Kicks
    • P3 – Bearcrawl across road and back ***AUDIBLE – since nobody on IR showed up, the PAX ran to the playground and back.

    COP #4:

    • Back to the Basketball Court
    • Circle up for BRICK BLIMPS BURNOUT
    • Holding a brick in each hand, the PAX completed a single round of BLIMPS together (x5 Burpees, x10 Lunges ea leg, x15 Imperial Walkers, x20 Merkins, x25 Plank Jacks, x25 Squats)
    • Round #2 OYO completing BLIMPS components at court corners
    • Circle back up for Variable Mary
    • Round #3 OYO BLIMPS around the court corners
    • Circle back up for Variable Mary Grand Finale

    BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama #13 + #2 K9’s
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • BONETHUGS took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:

    • YHC posted a few minutes early to plant the flag and take Cooper for a poop walk. DK showed up with Buddy (his poodle mix) and Cooper greeted the pair with great enthusiasm. 0530 and the PAX tucked into a fairly stationary 45min routine while the dogs played around the edges. Despite YHC’s efforts, no IR guys posted, but the hope is that we can continue to create opportunities for our injured guys to come out and enjoy the fellowship. Highlight of my morning was Wilson wailing as fresh rain began to fall during Freddie Mercuries – reminded me of the wicked witch crying “I’m melting!” In the COT, YHC thanked the SOJ PAX for remaining a welcome place for Cooper, Buddy, and any other pups to post (Flatty’s pup CHIP is next!). After some recent concerns being presented, Cooper will be attending only SOJ AO’s, namely NoToll and the Forge. If you are not SOJ but have enjoyed Cooper’s company the last two years, please come visit us anytime. YHC welcomes any further questions or concerns from SOJ PAX to be brought up anytime at our workouts. SYITG, YHC, DTH

  • DIG DEEP

    Solid numbers at SOT, four to run, 9 to gun, all in it to win it. The AO was warm and well lit, the black ice was only briefly encountered, and it was flurries, not Cooper hair in your eyes and mouth. Here’s what the bootcampers enjoyed:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:

    • Mosey down to Track parking lot
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • 4×4-icides Warmerama, 5–>1
    • Circle up for the usual 1st COP Mary to stretch things out

    COP #2:

    • Mosey to Track
    • Lap 1: x10 Burpees ea quarter
    • Lap 2: x20 WWII ea quarter
    • Lap 3: x30 Merkins ea quarter
    • Lap 4: x40 Squats ea quarter

    COP #3:

    • Mosey up to the school 
    • Partner up for a SPEEDORA:
    • x100 Donkey Kicks
    • x200 Monkey Humpers
    • x300 SSH’s
    • Partner sprints small curb circle
    • Audible out of time halfway through SSH’s —> BTTF

    COT:

    • Counterama # 13
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS: Doesn’t matter how old you are, F3 is hard, and if you want to improve over time, you’re gonna have to dig deep. YHC noted some incredible effort today from the PAX to push through the pain and encourage one another. That’s what this is all about. SYITG, YHC, DTH

  • 18 Studs for 17 Degrees

    The Dogpile gloom smacked a tit bit nipply upon arrival, but as the shovel flag was planted and the classic rock started thumping, an F2-inspired AO warming occurred, bringing climes to sunny and 70. With fantastic mumble chatter circulating, DTH called time and the PAX rocked out the following beatdown:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:

    • Mosey to the Amphitheater
    • DESCEND with x1 Burpee on each step
    • SSH for the SIX
    • Circle up at the bottom
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • DQ’s x10 IC
    • Imperial Squat Walkers x10 IC
    • Russian Soldiers x10 IC
    • Crab Cakes x10 IC
    • Leg-up Merkins x5 IC each side
    • WWII x10 IC
    • Freddie M’s x10 IC
    • Oblique Crunch x10 IC each side
    • ASCEND with x1 Burpee on each step
    • SSH for the SIX

    COP #2:

    • TABATA MOSEY, stopping every 30 seconds to complete called exercise x15 seconds, repeato until destination reached
    • PLAYGROUND TRIPLE CHECK:
    • P1 Swing Pumps
    • P2 Werkins
    • P3 Run around Bath house and back

    COP #3:

    • Mosey over to the reservoir, stopping for brief COP’s a couple times en route to keep the PAX together
    • RESERVOIR SLOPE TRIPLE CHECK:
    • P1 Lt Dans
    • P2 WWII’s
    • P3 Bernie to the top and run back down

    COP #4:

    • Embracing their inner spirit animal, the PAX was directed to ascend the sheer (maybe 60 degree) grass slope via Bear Crawl, then descend via Crab Walk (plenty of skiing noted)
    • Complete x3 Reps

    COP #5

    • Mosey all the way around the reservoir and back to Carillon Field, stopping for brief COP’s en route to keep the PAX together
    • QUARTER POUNDER:
    • Sprint out, Bernie back
    • 1/4 way, x25 Merkins
    • Half way, x50 Heels-2-Heaven
    • 3/4 way, x75 Freddie M’s (single count)
    • All the way, x100 SSH’s

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 18
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took us out with the following Devotional Prayer by John Baille

    NMS:

    • YHC had a great time with you guys this morning – thanks for coming along for the ride! Seems playing some background classic rock brings out a youthful spirit among the PAX, and of course the Triple Checks permitted some great F2 chatter. Welcome to Smuckers from F3 Wilmington! Glad Hitch was able to recover your keys! Stay safe in the snow this weekend, and hope to see most of you at Kindred Spirit on Mon night. Best, DTH

  • Nose Candy for Everyone

    Richmond’s hottest gloom club, known to the city’s all nighters as El Forjé put on a special show this morning, with cocaine dusting every mirrored surface. Five regular rave junkies flocked to the scene wearing nothing but banana hammocks and powder snorkels. The music thumped, the alter in memory of Hardywood, gloriously sequenced with neon ecstasy was duly thronged, and RPD showed up to shut things down but joined the party after just a few hits of aerosolized cocaine. Here’s how the police reported it:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:

    • Mosey over to the Bus Loop & Circle Up
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • EYE OF THE TIGER WARMERAMA:
    • SSH’s
    • Imperial Walkers
    • Russian Soldiers
    • Squats
    • Crab Cakes
    • Merkans
    • Groiners
    • SSH’s

    COP #2:

    • Mosey to the Amphitheater, Classic Rock keepin the beat
    • TABATA TIME:
    • 30s Exercise, 30s Box Jump Steps & Return
    • x9 Rounds rotating through:
    • Merkins
    • Donkey Kicks
    • Dips

    COP #3:

    • Mosey over to Mary’s Boudoir (covered space of Middle School)
    • Classic Rock Playlist continues
    • Partner up for a CONE DORA:
    • x100 WWII’s
    • x200 Heels-to-Heaven
    • x300 Flutters (2-ct)
    • Moving partner runs around the loop, stopping at each of the x10 cones to complete a Broad Jump Burpee

    Time filler Moseycizes a couple laps around the bus loop – Bernie, Shuffle Rt, Shuffle Lt, High Knees, Butt Kickers, etc

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 5
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • DOOZY took us out in Prayer

    NMS:

    • Beautiful first snowfall of the year welcomed a faithful few to the Forge, and YHC pulled out a fun routine from last year at NoToll. The quads and core really felt it today but the classic rock was a motivating accompaniment to the pain. All in all, no better way to start the day! LOVE spending time with my F3 brothers. See ya’ll at Dogpile, YHC, DTH

  • He’s Got The Whole NoToll In His Hands

    Five faithful SOJ HIM’s posted to NoToll expecting a DTH beatdown in freezing rain. But, their Faith being true, God cradled the AO in His hands, keeping conditions mild and dry, and they embraced the DTH beatdown with gusto – as follows:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:

    • Mosey to Circle Up in the Parking Lot
    • Welcome & F3 Disclaimer
    • Slow Body Builders x10 IC
    • DQ’s x10 IC
    • Imperial Squat walkers x10 IC
    • Hairy Rockettes x10 IC
    • CDD’s x10 IC
    • Werkins x10 IC
    • Crunchy Frogs x10 IC
    • Oblique Crunches x10 IC ea side

    COP #2:

    • Mosey over to Field 1 and line up along the baseline for a LINDSEY:  
    • Merkins:  30, 25, 20, 15, 10
    • Sprint across field between
    • Ball Dippers:  10, 15, 20, 25, 30

    COP #3:

    • Mosey to the Pavilion & Partner up (since odd numbers, four of the PAX passed partnering around the circle, leaving one man to do whatever Mary they wanted)
    • x3 Sets of:
    • x10 WWBooyah’s – sit facing w ankles locked, alternate WWII w booyah fives in middle – waiting partner remains at 45 degrees
    • x15 Squerkins each
    • x20 PLT’s each

    COP #4:

    • Mosey to the Parking Lot & Partner Up
    • Catch Me If You Can:
    • x2 Laps: P1 does x3 Burpees, runs to catch P2 doing Bernie around lot
    • x1 Lap: P1 does x5 Polar Bears, then catches P2 doing Lunges
    • x2 Laps: P1 does x10 SSH, then runs to catch P2 doing Caraoke

    Mosey BTTF:

    • Hold 6” plank until times up

    COT:

    • Counterama # 5
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took us out in Prayer

    NMS:

    • Literally as the PAX broke from COT and YHC pulled the SF from the ground, it started pouring freezing cold rain. What a generous gift from God to deliver us such a beautiful dry morning to complete the workout, holding off the rain until we were done. YHC is reminded so often of God’s faithfulness, because YHC can see Him working in and through everything. It’s been AWESOME getting back out i to the gloom and stretching this Covid-whipped frame back into shape. Appreciate you gents permitting me the honor to lead. SYITG, YHC, DTH