Author: Offshore

  • The F3 Defense

    Two SOPers joined YHC in the rain, then freezing rain, then snow for something like this:

    Lap around the track to the concession stand for COP: Dirty Birds, Carolina Dry Docks, Imperial Walkers, Mountain Climbers, Freddie Mercurys IC.

    Mosey to the east bleachers and partner up for partner 11s:  Dips at the bleachers and pull-ups at the pull-up bars, with a run in between.

    Mosey to the blacktop for Donkey Kicks at the wall x20, run to the other end, Lt. Dans x20; repeato 3x.

    Descending Derkins: Mosey back to the track and around, performing Derkins at each bench/bleacher starting with 10 reps and working down to 1 at the bench behind the VSF.

    COT

    NMM: YHC and Attila watched Honeydo roll in at 5:27 with blue flashing lights trailing.  He talked his way out of a speeding ticket and was ready to roll at 5:29:30.  The story was that the officer agreed that an Offshore Q is more punishment than a ticket…

    YHC didn’t get a chance to Q the Dirty Birds before the Falcons lost in the playoffs.  Since Burger King is sticking with 2 Legit 2 Quit in their commercials, it seemed okay to work them in.  Honeydo noted an NFC South theme for the other COP exercises – what to do for the Bucs, though?

    Attila thanked the Q for staying out of the freezing water on the ground, but truth be told, the Q’s fingers were numb after grabbing the pull-up bar.

    ANNOUNCEMENTS: Link for Healing Place 10K training info and signup: https://backblasts.f3rva.org/2018/01/28/pre-blast-healing-place-10k-training-team-signup/.

  • Little Data

    Or is it Small Data?  It was 70 and sunny at Heartbreak Ridge, so YHC expects to see record numbers at the other AOs.

    The THANG: Post next week, and YHC will be happy to Q it again.

    Announcements: Solid VQ by Bootleg yesterday.  Was that computer code in the BB (“++”, “-=”)?

  • A Record Day on the Trails

    A strong 7, including one SOPer, posted for a record day on the trails.

    The THANG: The Q called north side to south side, crossing at Belle Isle.  The PAX performed 0 burpees, one for each degree Fahrenheit, and began the journey.  Saab crossed at T. Potter.  Lab Rat, TYA, and Shakedown added the Forest Hill loop.

    NMM:  According to YHC’s records, this was the coldest Sunday trail run, the previous being at 5 degrees last year, and both completed by Saab in shorts.  Perhaps even more remarkable was Flatline’s first post to the trail run ever – heck of a day for an inaugural post.

    The Q informed TYA that he was not allowed shortcuts, nor to venture from the group, which probably led to TYA adding the loop.  YHC hopes he got the solitude he sought and finished strong.

    PAX noted that the trails were surprisingly pleasant this morning.  There were no mountain bikers, no other runners or hikers, and no trail mermaids, although Whistleblower did a song and dance as she imagined at one point that a salamander was crawling up her leg.

    To Honeydo’s “foolish is better than stupid” and Gomer’s “dry is better than warm,” we can add “snow-covered rocks are better than clean rocks.”  Flatline took a bit of a spill at one of the creek crossings, and YHC hopes he is okay.

    Shakedown and Saab documented frozen beards, eyelashes, rivers, and Hannibal Lecter masks with their cell phones.  Hopefully some pictures can be posted here.

    Saab: Ever notice that when we work out in these temperatures that cell phone batteries get drained?

    Offshore: No… crap, my phone just died.

    Thanks to Whistleblower and Flatline for the company and conversation along the Buttermilk.  Tclaps to Saab for beating the PAX to the pump house despite taking the long cut.  Tclaps to the other PAX for completing 10 miles (assuming you made it back…).

  • Twelve Faces of Christmas

    Five PAX, mirroring the five Platonic solids, emerged in the gloom at Heartbreak Ridge.  An exercise die in the shape of a regular dodecahedron (the fifth Platonic solid) was back in play after its introduction at Heartbreak Ridge last week:

    COP: 10 burpees for the temp + 1 burpee for the wind chill, Hammer Dance, Don Quixote, Mountain Climber, Hello Dolly, Elf/Russian Hammer Dance

    Mosey to the end of the upper field to use the exercise die.  PAX take turns tossing the die, the tosser calls how to get there (bear crawl, crab walk, etc.) , then PAX complete the exercise on the top face.  The number of reps on the die was multiplied by 1 on the first toss, 2 on the second, 3 on the third, then repeato.  Each PAX tossed 2-3 times as we traversed both softball fields.

    Mosey to pull up bars for 20 pull-ups each.  Mosey to the hill next to the football field for 5 runs up the hill, clearing each of the benches along the way.  Then 3 more runs.  Complete 1 revolution of Macarena merkins on the hill, and mosey back to the VSF for COT.

    NMM:  Plato supposedly thought God used the dodecahedron to arrange the constellations in the sky.  PAX could have verified this as the sky was clear, but spent most of their time staring at the ground in plank position.  Unlike last week, the die repeatedly rolled to a 1-minute plank (which was sometimes multiplied by 2 or 3).

    YHC introduced himself to Loose Goose and welcomed him to F3, as he did not recognize him bundled up in the gloom.  Kudos to Honeydo who posted again in shorts – perhaps a personal challenge?  One of the benches rose  up and checked Pucker on the sprints uphill as if he were planning to take a slapshot – YHC hopes you heal quickly.  Mr. Holland noted that Macarena merkins seem incomplete without Fudd’s singing.

    YHC was reminded again (by himself) that he should really get around to making a shovel flag.  Anyone up for a shovel flag workshop?

     

  • A Hoedown without Music

     

    A lucky 13 posted to Hoedown for a hoedown that went something like this:

    Mosey to the field for Disclaimer and COP.  YHC is out of practice Qing and rather out of shape, so consider looking to other PAX for proper form.

    IC: Hammer Dance x20, Elf Hammer Dance x20, Arm Circles forward/reverse/big/small, Moroccan Dance Party x20, Crabcakes x20, Breakdancers x20, Men at Work x20

    Mosey to the sloped blacktop for Macarena Merkins.  One revolution, two revolutions, then three revolutions. Al Gore Dance Party for the six in between sets.

    Mosey to the back of the cafeteria for Backside Blast Triple Check.  Dwight Howards, Rocky Balboas, and a run around the bus loop.

    Mosey back to the field for 4 corners.  Abyss Merkins x10, Lieutenant Dans x10, Derkins on the swings x10, Pullups x10.  Two laps.

    Mosey back to the VSF for Mary.  Flutter kicks IC x20, MC American Hammers x15, American Hammers x15

    COT

    NMM:

    Prior to the start, YHC’s car was nearly obliterated by a donation truck.  Soon after, a PAX posted in a furniture truck and another jumped the curb in his SUV.  It seemed like a lot of testosterone on display for a bunch of dudes about to do the Macarena.

    Some PAX were sure that Upright APDs would make an appearance, while others did not consider them a dance move.  As it is the season of hope and anticipation, the PAX were left hoping and anticipating.

    Announcements

    Slurpee VQ at Hoedown next week!

  • Trial Run on the Trails

    FND = Friendly New Dog.

    The THANG: Mosey to Reedy Creek and back.  Intermittent partner carry on the return trip over Nickel Bridge for PAX who are terrified of things with wheels.

    It was the first time on the trails for the FND and she had a great run.  Nearing Reedy Creek, she got a look in her eye that reminded YHC of her aunt Jesse – we are not going any further in *that* direction.  But we made it there and back.

    Naming was tabled so that additional PAX can weigh in.  “Skidmarks” was suggested: FND had pads that were equipped for any surface including slick rock and bike ramps, but she slides all over the hardwoods at home.

    Congrats to PAX completing races this weekend.  Looking forward to seeing you in the gloom.

  • With Batteaus on Their Belts

    A strong 11, including 1 FNG, emerged for Day 3 of Tuckahoe Takeover.  Here’s YHC’s recollection of what transpired:

    The THANG:

    COP: Hammer Dance x22, DQ x11, Windmills x11, Hello Dollies x22, Stick in the Mud (back lifts) x11 IC

    Mosey to playground.  3 sets of 6 Pull-Ups, 15 Monkey Humpers, and 15 HTH.  Add a fourth set as a tribute to home additions in Tuckahoe.

    From Green Acres to Beverly Hills: Two groups of railroad tracks across the bottom of Forest Hill bowl.

    The Last Shall Be First: Crawl Bear competition up the steep side of the bowl.  If a PAX taps out, he runs backward up the hill, and forward down the hill to the furthest remaining Crawl Bearer and repeat until all PAX are done.

    HoneyDo Tribute: Derkin Wheelbarrows down the bowl and up the other side, with ab exercises mixed in.  Ab exercises included Flutterkicks, Freddie Mercurys, WW II Situps, MC Hammer American Hammers, American Hammers.

    Tennis Court Triple Check: Plank, LBCs, run around tennis court.

    Merkin ROF

    COT

    NMM: YHC’s Q skills were clearly rusty, and he appreciates the PAX for sticking with him.  Counting to 11,  dividing 11 PAX into two and three groups, leading new exercises, and Fudd’s clarifying questions contributed to a complex undertaking.

    As YHC was securing the AO, a clown car emerged.   It was Ronnie, Love Seat, Keymaster, Slurpee, and FNG Rip from River Road Hills.  Soon after Fudd appeared, not looking a day over 40.  YHC sincerely appreciated the solidarity shown by the Tuckahoe region.

    YHC is not sure who “won” the Crawl Bear competition.  Multiple criteria could apply: furthest distance, longest time Crawl Bearing, quickest to the top.  YHC believes Swirly and Sippy Cup (and maybe others?) crushed the entire hill.  YHC had to reign Sippy in from trying to immediately Bear Crawl back down.

    Derkin Wheelbarrows + hills are no joke.  YHC nearly steered Bleeder into another downhill wheelbarrow, after which Fudd took over as wheelbarrow driver.

    Flipper wants everyone to know that his invention of MC Hammer American Hammers occurred in the context of a previous silly workout led by YHC that appeared to be a tribute to 80s and 90s dance music.

    Announcements:

    Congrats to TYA, LabRat, and Hardywood for completing their race this weekend.

    Convergence this Saturday at GridIron 6am and 7am.

    HDHH Wednesday.  In lieu of the hill run, meet at Kuba  Kuba Dos for a run around Tuckahoe at 5:30 followed by HDHH.   Kids on bikes are welcome.

    Prayers for EF Hutton and M’s family

     

  • We Are All SOJ

    Well, YHC was raised in Georgia and Alabama, so perhaps that is qualification enough to closeout SOJ week.

    A PAX of one posted just before 0615, cursing TYA because posting at 0615 on a Sunday is no joke.  Mosey to Texas Beach, stopping to chat with the Jazz Fest volunteer and to visit the blue box along the way, and back.  Stretch 0657 to 0702, then mosey to Buttermilk, somewhere between Reedy Creek and Belle Isle, and back.  Saab must have run through too early again, because the spiders seemed to have had time to resume their work.

    A tip for future travelers: if you are sweaty and in the middle of a run, don’t put TP down on the seat of the blue box and expect to leave it all there.  No, sir, that dog don’t hunt.  Better to wipe the seat and take your chances, or… pull a Fudd.

    To celebrate the end of SOJ week, YHC recommends reading The Creek BB and comments about what it means to be SOJ.  Classic.

  • Re-colonizing the Slide

    A solid six PAX got the week started right with a beatdown at The Punisher that went something like this:

    The THANG:

    Mosey to the front of the school for COP: Hammer Dance IC x20, Imperial Walker IC x20, Don Quixote IC x10, Walk-Out Merkin x10, M.C. American Hammer IC x10, American Hammer IC x10

    Mosey to northeast corner for plerkins x20.  Mosey to northwest corner for another set of plerkins x20.

    Mosey to the playground for AMRAP:  5 pull-ups, 10 WWII situps, 15 squats, then traverse the playground and plank for the six.  PAX completed 8 sets in 20 minutes, with some plank jacks, mountain climbers, and shoulder taps sprinkled in.

    Mosey to the bus loop for catch-me-if-you-can.  One partner performs 15 dips then runs to catch the other partner, who is traversing the bus loop doing polar bears.  Mosey back to the flag for COT.

    NMM:
    YHC figured that with school out and the hot temperatures, the playground equipment may not have its usual bacterial flora.  The PAX took care of that with dozens of trips through the tube during the AMRAP.  Maybe still not the usual flora, but flora nonetheless.

    It was great to have Scrappy back out for his second post.  Look out, though, Dear Ol’ Dad is catching up.  Great job to all the PAX who pushed through the pull-ups and sit-ups, and even offered some self-critiques on form.

    Toucan taught the PAX about heavy machine guns and automatic grenade launchers and advised that once you pull the trigger, just keep shooting.  It reminds me of his approach to a workout.

    Announcements:

    HDHH this Wednesday at The Answer

    Golf tournament August 7th (see Upchuck)

    Sign up for Reese Strong (see Phonics)

     

  • The Toughest Lindsay?

    A strong PAX of five emerged from the gloom for a KB beatdown that went something like this:

    The THANG:

    COP IC: Hammer Dance x20, Don Quixote x10, Hillbillies x20, Rosalita x20, MC American Hammer x20, Back Lift x10

    Mosey to basketball court.  25 KB swings and 5 burpees OYO.   Rinse and repeat 4x.

    Mosey to grass in front of front parking lot for Lindsays: Merkin Rows and WW II Situp Presses.  Take a lap around the front parking lot in between sets.   Mosey back to VSF for COT.

    NMM:  YHC recalled a Gumbo Q that was particularly hard, and wanted to see how he did with Qdrenalyne.  The called Lindsay would be tough without a KB.  The PAX confirmed that it was no joke, but pushed through and crushed it.  No shortcuts were possible on the laps between Lindsay sets because the front parking lot is torn up, and there is a Porta-John that needs servicing.

    Announcements:

    Now – New F3 RVA website is live (F3RVA.org).

    Today – Ultimate Frisbee at Atlee High School followed by a COTU visit – Ms and 2.0s welcomed – check website(s) for earlier Preblast.

    July 8th – Toga’s Dogpile swan song.

    July 12th – HDHH / Toga send-off at The Answer Brewpub – check website(s) for earlier Preblast

    August 7th – Charity golf tournament in Stafford – see Upchuck for details.

    September 16th – Reese Strong 5K –Signs ups will open soon. Join the F3 team.