Author: Offshore

  • The Toughest Lindsay?

    A strong PAX of five emerged from the gloom for a KB beatdown that went something like this:

    The THANG:

    COP IC: Hammer Dance x20, Don Quixote x10, Hillbillies x20, Rosalita x20, MC American Hammer x20, Back Lift x10

    Mosey to basketball court.  25 KB swings and 5 burpees OYO.   Rinse and repeat 4x.

    Mosey to grass in front of front parking lot for Lindsays: Merkin Rows and WW II Situp Presses.  Take a lap around the front parking lot in between sets.   Mosey back to VSF for COT.

    NMM:  YHC recalled a Gumbo Q that was particularly hard, and wanted to see how he did with Qdrenalyne.  The called Lindsay would be tough without a KB.  The PAX confirmed that it was no joke, but pushed through and crushed it.  No shortcuts were possible on the laps between Lindsay sets because the front parking lot is torn up, and there is a Porta-John that needs servicing.

    Announcements:

    Now – New F3 RVA website is live (F3RVA.org).

    Today – Ultimate Frisbee at Atlee High School followed by a COTU visit – Ms and 2.0s welcomed – check website(s) for earlier Preblast.

    July 8th – Toga’s Dogpile swan song.

    July 12th – HDHH / Toga send-off at The Answer Brewpub – check website(s) for earlier Preblast

    August 7th – Charity golf tournament in Stafford – see Upchuck for details.

    September 16th – Reese Strong 5K –Signs ups will open soon. Join the F3 team.

  • Sally For Now

    Eleven emerged to celebrate YHC’s 40th Flag Day Eve with a beatdown that went something like this:

    Mosey to left field on Field 1 for COP: Hammer Dance x20 IC, Windmills x10 IC, Upright APDs x8(?) IC, Mariah Careys x10 each leg IC, Men At Work x20 IC.  In between each set, 5 walkout Merkins OYO.

    Mosey to the shotput pad for Sally.

    Mosey to the track for Triple Check: Crawl Bear up hill, Hello Dollys, LBCs.

    Mosey to the midpoint between the softball fields for Lindsay: Merkins and Broad Jumps toward the third baseline of Field 2.

    Mosey to the hill.  Bear crawl halfway up and plank, incline Merkins IC x5, rotate 90 degrees, Merkins IC x5, rotate 90 degrees, decline Merkins IC x5, rotate 90 degrees, Merkins IC x5, bear crawl to top of hill.

    Mosey to the other side of the track.  Merkin ROF, WWII situps x10 IC, M.C. American Hammers x20 IC, Primo-led Marge/Homer/Single-Leg Dollys.

    Mosey back to the flag for COT.

    NMM:

    YHC plans what he thinks is more than 45 minutes, and the PAX just crushes it.    PAX still needs to work on Upright APDs, though – they haven’t made it through a full set yet.

    Themes for the workout today were humping the air, YHC’s personal challenges (Sally, Merkin Challenge, Crawl Bear up that hill), and indestructibility of the Soundfreaq Soundkick: https://www.amazon.com/Soundfreaq-SFQ-04-Sound-Bluetooth-speaker/dp/B007XOQI4S The speaker survived being run over by a smiling woman in a Buick during the COT.  Polls open at 7, ma’am.

    Props to Cake who continues to post in a hooded sweatshirt.  He is from Roanoke, which is halfway to Mouth of Wilson.

    During the Lindsay, PAX spotted a lawnmower being brought to the softball fields.  Alas, it was only a tractor for dragging the dirt infield.  “We just have about 5 more minutes, sir.”  “I gotta drag this field.”  Ok…

    Thanks to Rosie for introducing Sally and bear crawl/Merkin up the hill, FlipDawg for inventing the  M.C. American Hammer on the fly this morning, Primo (Charlotte) for leading the Marge/Homer/Single-Leg Dollys, and Toga for lending the SF.  Happy Birthday to Gumbo’s 2.0.

    Sally is the name of YHC’s new puppy.  The M and 2.0 threatened to change her name, but couldn’t decide on a new name, so her name at the vet is Sally For Now.

    West End lunch is Fridays at noon at Whole Foods.

     

     

  • A Suboptimal KB Workout

    Seven (or was it eight?) PAX posted to the Circus for YHC’s virgin KB Q.  After a quick disclaimer that the workout may include dance-inspired exercises, the beatdown went something like this:

    The THANG:

    COP: Hammer Dance x20 IC, Don Quixote x10 IC, Windmill x20 IC, Men at Work x20 IC, Pickle Pounders x10 IC.  After each exercise, walkout Merkins OYO increasing from 1 to 5.

    Lindsay: Lunges and Merkins down the side of the school.

    Dora: Goblet squat, KB swings, Lawnmowers.  One partner exercises while the other jogs 20 ft to the ramp, crawl bear up the ramp, and jog back.

    Conveyor Belt: curls 5x each side, shoulder press 5x each side, upright rows 10x, KB bear crawl to next station.

    Merkin Ring of Fire.

    COT

    NMM:

    Welcome to the  June Merkin challenge!  By YHC’s count (not to be trusted), PAX completed 125 Merkins.

    Earthworm complained that there was too much running, despite walking all the 20 ft lengths in the Dora.  Johnsonville asked if this workout was optimized.  It was, but the objective function was to minimize WWII situps, with a constraint on a minimum number of Merkins.  YHC will need to incorporate multi-criteria optimization next time.

    Attila and YHC competed to see who could smell their gloves the furthest from their faces.  YHC’s gloves are soaking in Woolite in an effort to lose the next round.

    Krü continues to insist on finishing all reps during recovery periods, inspiring the other PAX to push themselves harder.  Tclaps!

    White Deer, Mudface, and Jville crushed the crawl bear.  The COP warmup must have gotten their juices flowing.  Their reward was more of the exercises during the Dora.

    Announcements:

    BRR runners and drivers needed – see TYA

    ReeseStrong (M Phonics) and Fudd party 6/10

    Crossover Clinic Moo & Brew 5k (Malpractice) 6/3

  • R.I.P. Goo Shoes

    A two PAX beat the fartsack, daylight savings time, and alarm clock incompetence to hit the trails this morning.

    The THANG:  Northside to the new bridge to the southside. ~7 miles.

    NMM:  PAX will recall Helix’s Shoe Goo Shoes.  YHC is sad to report that they were laid to rest as they had become more goo than shoe.  Applications are being accepted for replacements.

    YHC properly adjusted the time on his alarm clock but screwed up the alarm time and awoke at 6:41am.  Google Maps says it should take 17 minutes to reach the AO.  YHC arrived at 7:01 AM.  YHC thinks as a general rule it’s probably best not to know the shortest amount of time required to reach the AO.

    YHC was glad to see Helix, and grateful for his patience with a late arrival.  It was a beautiful morning for a trail run: clear, calm, and a little cold.  Lights were needed only on the initial descent – the days are getting longer.  For YHC, the bigger challenge was seeing through the sleep in his eyes.

    YHC is anxious to hear stories about the Belmont and hope the PAX are recovering well.

  • Rise Up and Get Buck

     

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-yrtKsCdI8

     

    13 PAX rose up and got buck at 45MOM.

    The THANG:

    COP: Hammer Dance x~20, Power Dance x~20, Dirty Birds x~20, Mariah Careys x10 each leg, Pickle Pounders IC x10.

    Mosey to the basketball court for Triple Check: hip-slappers, WWII situps, backwards run/forwards sprint.

    Mosey to the field for Bear-Crab Futbol. Each time the ball goes out of bounds, all PAX perform 5 Burpees. If a team scores, they perform 10 Monkey Humpers to celebrate. The scoring team names an exercise for the other team to perform 20 reps.

    Mosey to the side wall of the school for the Ascending Testicle: 10 derkins with feet at 15 degrees, 10 at 45 degrees, 10 in BTTW position.

    Groundhog Day – mosey back to the basketball court for the same Triple Check.

    Mosey back to the flag for COT.

    NMM:
    YHC ended the disclaimer by asking TYA to complete the sentence: If a PAX is perfectly capable of performing an exercise, but chooses not to, then…. His response was “he’s a fish taco,” or something like that. PAX then proceeded to perform three exercises in honor of the Super Bowl-bound Atlanta Falcons.

    The Q’s counting was a little off due to lack of practice and deafening mumblechatter, but PAX seemed forgiving. The mumblechatter was reduced to stunned silence by the end of the beatdown. YHC will work on ways to spread it out a bit.

    After a swift kick out of bounds to get the Burpees going, the bear team scored within 10 seconds by threading a shot through the D and into the kid-sized goal (Marv? Singer? TYA? McRib? – it was a blur). PAX switched sides/positions, then Flipper willed a goal for the new bears. The 1-1 deadlock persisted for several minutes and a bazillion burpees, so YHC declared a golden goal overtime. The original bears scored within a minute for the victory. The losing team performed two sets of Mariah Careys, and the winning team performed one set of Hammer Dances.

    The Ascending Testicle was in honor of Sippy Cup and Chum Bucket who each posted solo to AOs in snowy freezing weather recently. Props to you gents, and hope your anatomy has dropped back into place.

    Best wishes to the PAX down and out with illnesses and injuries.

    Announcements:
    Lunch today at 12 at Wong’s.  Races: Belmonte (TYA) in March, Smoky Mountain (Swirly) and Ragnar (Toga) relays in April.  Suicide awareness and prevention golf tournament (Fudd) in April.

     

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRXtzsq4zl4

  • Texas Beach is Open for Business

    Four PAX emerged to open the trails for the few from RVA not at the Bear Creek.

    The THANG: Texas Beach, then loop around pipeline trail for about 4 miles total.  COT

    NMM: The PAX posted to the parking lot, each expecting to be the only runners this morning, but were rewarded with the company of three others with the same goals for the morning.  F3 delivers again.

    The parking lot was 100% F3 at the start of the run, and there were very few others on the trails.

    Cliffhanger (Rosie 2.0) is preparing for the track team in the spring.  Way to run today!  The PAX hopes F3 becomes a regular part of your preseason routine, and will be anxious to follow your season.

    It was great to have Aisle 5 back on the trails.  He claims to be haunted by YHC whispering in his ear whenever running uphill, even when YHC is right in front of him or 200 miles away.

    Best wishes to the Bear Creek crew.  PAX will be anxious for stories about the adventures there.

    Last Sunday, YHC’s car almost broke down on the way to the AO.  YHC was able to limp into the dealer and the M picked him up.  Lesson learned, though: regardless of how you want to dress for a workout, be prepared for a breakdown just in case!

    Rosie’s crew is getting geared up for the next trip to Mount Trashmore next Saturday.  Final details coming early this week.

     

  • Make Punisher Great Again

    Punisher has always been great.  7 PAX including 1 FNG posted on a chilly November morning to demonstrate why.

    The THANG:

    Mosey to the front field for COP IC: SSH x20, Pickle Pounders x10, Merkins x10, APDs x20, Stick in the Mud/Backlifts x10, Don Quixote x10

    Mosey to the end of the soccer field for Lindsays: Broad Jumps and Merkins.

    Mosey to the Pavilion for modified Dora 50-100-150: Box Jump Burpees, Weezy Jefferson/Kirk Cousins, Monkey Humpers

    Mosey to the playground for Cindy with a slide: 5 pull-ups, 10 merkins, 15 squats, then traverse the playground including the slide.  AMLAP.

    Mosey back to the front for Hands of Time.  Mosey back to the SF for COT.

    NMM:

    Welcome FNG Ronnie and welcome back to Speedo.  Speedo showed how to give all you’ve got, even completing an extra round of pullups.

    Broad jumps during Lindsays were an unexpected challenge.  The PAX rose to the occasion and powered through a difficult exercise.

    Several PAX commented on the holes in YHC’s sweatpants, but it was nothing YHC had not heard before.  If someone made functional pink leopard print duct tape, it would be on the pants.

    Lockjaw asked repeatedly how PAX should know when to go to the next exercise on the Cindys.  “When you are done with your reps” was not clear enough.  Toga rapid-fired several questions in an effort to increase confusion, and missed the part about going through the new playground.  Fudd will be pleased to know that his name was not mentioned.

    For those in the Merkin Challenge, PAX did 20 Merkins in the warmup, 100 during Lindsays, and 50 with 5 rounds of Cindys (mileage may vary) for ~170.

    Need a date this weekend?  Call Ronnie.  He now has Lindsay, Dora, and Cindy in his portfolio.

    Announcements:

    Another van to Va Beach this weekend.  Stay tuned for 2nd F details.

  • Voyage to the Old Worlds

    Four PAX launched their weeks in proper fashion with the Punisher.

    The Thang:

    Mosey to the concrete circle in front of the school for COP.  IC: SSH x25, Don Quixote x10, Arm Circles x10 forward/reverse, Stick in the Mud/back lifts x15, Merkins x10

    Mosey to the map on the basketball court, around where San Salvador Island would be.  In pairs, PAX voyage to different destinations for exercises, then return.

    Voyage 1: Monkey bars (audible: soccer goal) for 10x pull ups for each PAX

    Voyage 2: Corner at Labernum for 25x jump rope and 20x American Hammers

    Voyage 3: Front wall of school for 20x Donkey Kicks and Balls to the Wall

    Voyage 4: Pavilion for 20x Hail Marys

    Voyage 5: NW corner of property for 20x Plerkins

    Plank exercises in between.  Shuffle pairs of PAX after one set of voyages and repeat.  Voyage 1 was not repeated.

    Mosey to front of school for Hands of Time.  COT.

    NMM: Four voyages were planned, but one “old world,” the monkey bars, was closed for repairs.  PAX improvised with the soccer goal.  Chum devised a brilliant scheme where one PAX would plank on the back of the goal while the other completed pull ups on the upper 90 of the goal.  Still, the goals were slippery, and YHC was in need of a spot.  YHC asked TenCan for a two count, and TwoCan responded with a ten count.  Thanks for picking YHC up.

    Welcome to Ickey Shuffle, visiting from Charlotte.  He will be working with/for CapTech today and tomorrow, so CapTech PAX be on the lookout.

     

  • Pre-blast: Trails 101

    Trail-running PAX are anxious to get new people out on the trails on Sunday mornings.  YHC has heard from several that the mileage is too much.  That dog no longer hunts: starting Sunday, there will be 3-4 mile routes offered in addition to regular routes to allow new runners to build up stamina.

    Trail runs are at your own pace, and the PAX circles back every 1-1.5 miles to get the six.  No PAX left behind!

    Join the PAX on Sundays at 7am to experience: sunrises over the James River and cemeteries, trail mermaids, the Spur, the Sugar/Slingshot Tree, scratching the Nutsack Tree, and, an awesome 1st and 2nd F before you hustle home to get your 3rd F on!

     

     

  • Follow the Black-on-Pink Signs

    Four PAX tumbled out of the fartsack, one in bike shorts (yikes!), into a foggy muggy morning for a trail run.

    The THANG:  Northside to the southside.  COT.

    NMM: YHC began the morning by tapping the Offshore accounts and settling his gambling debts in DK’s survivor pool after the Aints dropped their opener to the Raiders last week.

    The PAX maintained a slow and steady pace and stayed together on a tough last summer morning.  Expectations were for something more like fall weather, but conditions were conducive to profuse sweating, leading some PAX to question whether they had made any gains after training all summer.  BRRers DK and TYA noted that the trails seemed so easy compared their legs last week.  Non-BRRers wondered how that could be.

    TYA could not wait for colder temps to bring out the tights, and so went with bike shorts.  A young woman with a pink leopard print steering wheel pulled up asking for directions to a restroom.  TYA claimed she just wanted a closer look, but the PAX weren’t buying it, nor his additional justifications throughout the run for bike shorts.

    The trail running PAX are anxious to get new runners out there, and are offering 3-4 mile routes.   Too-long routes are no longer an excuse!

    Announcements: Stay tuned for info on the Tidewater area launch.  Sign up for the Bear Creek 10-miler (12/4).