Author: Offshore

  • That’s Too Many!

    Flying in the face of dismal forecasts, a super-solid PAX of 5 posted to The Crucible for the following:

    Mosey around to the school circle for a disclaimer and COP: SSHs, IWs, Hillbillys, Merkins, Freddie Mercurys, Scorpion Kicks IC.

    Mosey to the curb for an Ascending Bear Crawl up to 13.

    Mosey to a picnic table for a variation on B.O.M.B.S.: like a Dora where the PAX alternates between exercises and running to another picnic table. Each PAX completes: 25 Box Jump Burpees, 50 Overhead Claps, 75 Merkins, 100 Big Boy Situps, 125 Squats.

    COT

    Announcements: Carols tomorrow, one-hit wonders next Saturday at Dogpile. YHC is out of town next Saturday. Plans for The Crucible?

    NMS: The goal was to produce a beatdown that the camera crews would be sorry they missed. Honeydo issued the BB title at the announcement of the Ascending Bear Crawl – a good indication that the PAX were on the right track. YHC comforted Honeydo with a slogan YHC uses at work: It could be worse. Note that it is not, “It could be a lot worse,” because that wouldn’t be true, but it could be worse. YHC could have included Crawl Bear. The PAX did it by the book: Exicon – F3 Nation.

    Scripps has posted twice now – a Honeydo Q and now this one. He is tired of silent assassins and suspects that there are loud and soft Qs to experience. Extra Credit powered through all of the exercises and is starting to formulate plans for his VQ with inspiration from his military training. Smile17 (Smiles for short) was all smiles, of course. His name comes from the fact that he placed 17th in the 10-miler in September: A Day of Firsts (f3rva.org)

  • Sealed

    Three PAX posted for a beatdown and came out looking like coal miners. The Thang:

    Mosey to the new blacktop for a COP: SSHs, IWs, DQs, Merkins, LBCs IC.

    Suicides on the blacktop with exercises: Flutter Kicks, Lieutenant Dans, Merkins.

    Mosey to the playground for 11s with Partner-Assisted Pullups and WWIIs.

    Two rounds of Crawl Bear uphill to a tree and Jump Squats x10.

    Mosey to a picnic table for three rounds of: Dips x20, Derkins x10, Box Jumps x10.

    Back to the playground for American Hammers x30, APDs x20.

    COT

    Prayers for THP residents.

    NMS: The Q called LBCs early to embrace the wet conditions and the blacktop did not disappoint – it felt like a big puddle. During the suicides, YHC looked over to see that Joey Chesnut’s bright gold hoodie had turned black from the asphalt sealant. The PAX then realized they were all covered in it and it did not wash off easily. Maybe next time we’ll just go under cover and do some Mary. Or maybe not!

  • Marathon Day

    These guys were everywhere at The Crucible today, wondering which way the hurricane went. They took a break from their quest to behold the following beatdown:

    Mosey to the new blacktop and line up for an LOP: SSH, IW, DQ, Cherry Picker, LBC, Merkin x26, each with a Burpee chaser.

    Bear crawl the length of the blacktop.

    4 corners: CDD, Rosalita, Jump Squat, Flutter Kick x26 with a Burpee chaser. Bernie, Lunge, Karaoke, Karaoke between corners.

    Mosey back to the school for Bulgarian Split Squat x26 each leg with a Burpee chaser. Mosey to a new picnic table for Incline Merkin x26 with a Box Jump Burpee chaser. Mosey to a new picnic table for Dip x26 with a Box Jump Burpee chaser.

    Mosey to the swings for 26 swings and then 26 Swing Jerkins with a Burpee chaser after each.

    4Corners on the playground: WWII, Hello Dolly, Mariah Carey L over R, Mariah Carey R over L. 26 reps each with a Burpee chaser.

    Sprint up the hill, then run back to the car for 26 LBCs with a Burpee chaser. Repeato.

    American Hammer x26 and then guess what, a Burpee freakin’ chaser.

    COT

    All the best to the runners today including first-time marathoner Flintstone and 70+ miler Anthrax.

  • A Mobile Crucible Audible

    Anthrax ran in from the pump house to help open The Crucible for business. PAX decided to add some extra miles today and took off to explore the southside. The route: AO to Route 1, Hull St, hang a right to the Slave Trail back up to the flood wall gate, along the river to Hull St., left on 13th, right on Stockton, left to Blackwell.

    YHC thought about giving Anthrax a tour of 10k training runs in Manchester, but quickly realized that he knew the area much better. With about 0.1 miles left after the last turn onto Stockton, Anthrax said, “I have no idea where we are” – mission accomplished to get him lost!

    PAX had a great conversation and enjoyed learning new routes. PAX agreed that the memo needs to get out: Bad Weather = Mandatory Attendance + The Best Memories.

  • A Day of Firsts

    It was either the first road race, or the first of this distance for each of the PAX, but they turned in some monster performances. Some ran 16.19k and some ran 6.19 mi. Those who ran the 6.19 mi were hungry for more and several who ran the 16.29k wondered whether they could have pushed harder at the beginning… studs. Future FNG Jose torched the 10 mile course to place 18th overall (or was it 3rd?!).

    The PAX were pumped about their running experience and appeared to have even more fun welcoming strangers along with the remaining PAX at the finish line. Several got to meet Djimon Hounsou. Rocket Man is on the IR, but posted to cheer on the PAX. He is anxious to rejoin the PAX. Impact was there with a huge #Weoffthecouch contingent and probably ran a 10k escorting each of his crew across the finish line, an effort worthy of a Big Data point.

  • Flash Mob at The Crucible

    The parents and kids rolling in for football at Sydnor Playground were treated to the following pre-game show:

    COP on the blacktop at Blackwell: SSHs, IWs, DQs, Merkins, LBCs, Helicopters. Mosey to the baseball field at Sydnor Playground for…

    Baseball Beast. Start at home plate and in the grass behind first, second, and third base, perform 6 reps of an exercise, run home and reverso. Exercises were: HRMs, WWIIs, Jump Squats, Carolina Dry Docks, Lunges, Burpees. Mosey back to the blacktop for…

    Playground pickup and American Hammers: pick up 5 pieces of trash and do 5 American Hammers. AMRAP until time.

    COT: T&P for the BRR runners and for the men of THP.

    NMS: Joey Chestnut kept his Crucible streak alive (was there any doubt he wouldn’t?). Bean put in great work in his return appearance.

    YHC thought he overheard one of the parents express disappointment that she wasn’t notified of the flash dance/mob at the field before the game, referring to the PAX in the middle of their Baseball Beast. PAX invited her to join us.

    Note to future Qs: parents and kids roll into Sydnor at 7:45 for games at 9am.

    Many masks were lost on the playground during recess this week at Blackwell. `

  • The Other Side of the Street

    The geese stayed on the field and were too chicken to cross the road because of the following beatdown at Blackwell:

    COP: SSHs, IWs, DQs, LBCs, CDDs, Helicopters IC

    Mosey to the side of the school for a Triple Check. People’s Chair and American Hammers. The timer runs to the playground, up the stairs, and down one of the slides. The directions included an implicit “Weeeeeee!” or “Woooooo!” as PAX went down the slide.

    At each of five sets of picnic tables: 4 Box Jump Burpees, 20 Dips, 10 Derkins. When finished at one picnic table, find an open picnic table and repeato.

    Dora with 100 Freddie Mercurys, 200 LBCs, 300 Squats

    Double Merkin Ring of Fire. Double Heels to Heaven Ring of Fire.

    COT

    Announcements: BRR, Labor Day Convergence, RVA 8 Year Anniversary, Sit and Sip.

    Prayers: YHC’s neighbor, families of bikers and drivers from last weekend’s accident, the men of THP.

    NMS: Tclaps for the PAX who ran from THP to the AO and back again. Their timing was a bit off, though, as they arrived late for the COP. They’ll nail it next week. The other PAX took a lap around the school to check if others had mistakenly posted to the field. Nope, just geese. The runners arrived with two FNGs just as the non-runners completed the lap.

    Welcome to FNGs Kindergarten Cop and No Regerts. Their first concerts were Judas Priest and Reba McEntire. Strong work today!

    Gomer was upset YHC couldn’t figure out the timer on the iPhone camera. If it doesn’t have a CLI with Vim bindings, YHC is lost. Hitchhiker saved the day. YHC still managed to make it look like a photo-bombed selfie, much to Joey Chestnut’s frustration.

    Coffeteria at Cafe Zata afterwards. They are up to 1 cook from 0 last week. The coffee, food, and patio are F3 approved. The parking situation needs some help. THP is 0.7 mi away – too far? It is potentially a location to EH new PAX members.

    The PAX are looking forward to getting Shakedown back out there after he recovers.

  • Is that made up? That sounds made up.

    “Is That Made Up? It Sounds Made Up.” National Lampoon’s Vacation – You

    The joggers making laps around Godwin encouraged the PAX through a beatdown that went something like this:

    COP: SSHs, IWs, DQs, Merkins, Hello Dollies, Reverse Crunches, Imperial Squat Walkers IC

    Mosey to door number 13. 13 Curls and 1 Squat Thruster.

    Mosey to door number 12. 12 Tricep Extensions and 2 Squat Thrusters.

    Continue around the building, conducting exercises based on the door number followed by Squat Thrusters. The PAX made it to door number 1, then 23, 22, …, 18 before time ran out. 19.5 rounds, so up to 18 Squat Thrusters (?). Towards the end, we sprinkled a lap around the bus loop, Arm Circles, Helicopters, etc.

    COT

    Announcements: New AO The Crucible in Manchester at Blackwell Elementary this Saturday at 7:30am. See Slack for more details.

    NMS: This beatdown was inspired by White Deer inspired by Doozy to take a tour of the doors. YHC lost count, but is fairly certain that there are 23. YHC can confirm that the dude walking the wrong way down Pump is miraculously still alive. Strong work by the PAX today. It was great to be back in the fold after vacation last week.

  • Oyster’s About to Produce a Pearl

    An enormous moon vaporized behind the clouds at 0530 because it couldn’t bear to witness the following beatdown:

    COP: SSHs, IWs, DQs, Merkins, FMs IC. Mosey to the bus loop.

    Paula Abdul with no steps back: Lunge past two posts. At the first post, 2 American Hammers; at the third post, 4 Curls; fifth post, 6 American Hammers; all the way to the end. Mosey to the front bus loop.

    Lindsay (The Toughest Lindsay? (f3rva.org)): Merkin Rows and Sit-and-Presses, with a lap around the bus loop in between each set. Mosey back to the back bus loop.

    Paula Abdul with no steps back: Lunge past two posts. At the first post, 2 High Pulls; at the third post, 4 Overhead Pulls; fifth post, 6 High Pulls; all the way to the end. Mosey back to the VSF.

    COT.

    NMS/Announcements: Congratulations to Coach Attila’s and 2.0 Spider’s 10U baseball team for winning the state Little League tournament! They are off to the regionals next week. Mariner’s team is also playing for the state (Juniors/Seniors?) tournament soon.

    Prayers for LabRat and other PAX on the IR.

    Welcome back to Circus to Fudd who did not like the humidity, but is clearly in stellar shape after living on that thin CO air for a couple of years. He had no questions for the Q and even questioned the creativity of the beatdown.

    Just when YHC was considering an audible on the Lindsay, Fireman Ed said, “but that’s not how Offshore works” – hell yeah! So we finished the Lindsay. Tclaps to the PAX for completing the Lindsay and a whole lot more than the last time we did it. Tip of the hat to Gumbo for the inspiration.

    Nice work men!

  • WOD Returns to the Circus

    COP: SSHs Hammer Dances, Power Dances, Dirty Birds, IWs, DQs, Copperhead Squats, Merkins, Freddie Mercuries IC.

    Mosey to the back field for 10 rounds of the following:

    • 6 Squat and Press
    • 6 KB Getups
    • 6 2-count Mountain Climbers
    • 6 Burpees, jumping over the KB each rep
    • 6 High Pulls
    • Run to the tire at the end of the field, flip the tire, and run back.

    Mosey back to the VSF for a socially-distanced COT.

    Announcements and Prayer Requests: The Bridge, all the PAX on the IR (Pigskin, Pinto, Gypsy, Blue Moon, LabRat, …) and family members.

    NMS: Strong work by the PAX today. YHC thinks it is the jump over the kettlebell during the burpees that is the most brutal. The beatdown was inspired by the Robbie Miller WOD workout with the following exceptions: 10 rounds instead of 12, no 3 mile ruck before and after, High Pulls instead of Pull Ups, and the addition of Tire Flips. The last time we did this at Circus, we used Partner Jerkins instead of High Pulls and got through 7 rounds.

    Homer and Whitesnake got introduced to the SSH variations. Homer’s Hammer Dance looks more like Swag Surfin – hey, maybe he’s on to something new. The PAX soaked up a few grass clippings and got a bit wet in the process. The tire was a nice surprise – the grass underneath was dead so it really needed to be flipped.