Author: Last Call

  • What’s Yours Say?

    10 Tuckahoans, with collars properly popped, welcomed 4 impressive looking fellows from the warmer side of the river, including 1 clown car that arrived from the far reaches of the flat earth. Cooler temps were expected with numerous knees covered by various fabric selections. A few manlier types selected better ventilation and thus deemed superior. Regardless, here is how things went down.

    Handshake finally arrives, so we can begin. Santa Call in his fully starched hat, pulls out his trusty sack to disperse various head gear to the PAX. This gear is meant to be worn throughout the beatdown, however some noggins could not be contained.

    Mosey around the parking lot to avoid snow and ice. Circle up for introductions and disclaimers, warm ups included SSH’s, Helicopters, Jazzercise with toe taps, Dead Man Hang, Merkins, LBC’s, all in conversation without counting to encourage the mumblechatter.

    Mosey to the base of the Triangle where triple check partners were selected based on headgear. No duplicate hats could be in the same group. Timer runs to River Road and returns with partners doing squats and shoulder taps. 3 rounds complete with quick running route changed after round 1.

    Mosey down Cameron Road to the base of Culpepper. Stop for another triple check this time partners are grouped as similar headgear. Timer skips a portion of the way to Grattan and runs the rest. Exercises included mountain climbers and imperial squat walkers.

    Mosey back up to Ridge for Dora. 50 merkins, 100 WWII’s, 150 jump squats with timer running to parking lot entrance.

    BTTVF for a brief bit of Mary with 10 American Hammers and 10 Heels to Heaven. Numbers, Names, Announcements and Prayers. YHC took us out.

    Announcements: Kubota is leading the Bridge on 12/27. Could the SZN of GVN be heading west? Fudd and Flatline are leading Breaking Bread in December, thank you boys. Spaces available in 2026. Gomer is leading a watch party for the Army/Navy game on Saturday at Wood & Iron Short Pump. Gumbo’s 2.0 is marching. See Slack for deets.

    NMS: Great turnout for finest 5 am beatdown in the land. Cooler temps lead to YHC on a more mobile workout to keep the warmth moving. All snow was avoided and no slips were registered as of the time of this post. YHC’s M decided to infiltrate the gifts with shameless marketing materials. Enjoy the bevy’s than let Mrs LC handle your portfolio. SZN of GVN keeps rolling with Handshake now on the clock. Well done fellas. Thanks for letting me lead.

  • You Had to Be There

    A pair of fluffy snow angels experienced the quaint softness of the uber exclusive Tundra Room of the Twin Team Lounge. Velvety ropes be damned as this is how we got things done today to the best of my recollection.

    No Q on the sheet, so a rare hot potato ensued that was beyond brutal. YHC started us off. To toughen us up PAX decided to go barefoot, shirtless and no gloves for the entire workout, proper Lounge attire.

    Let us begin with a short 100% sprint up and down Twin Team Hill. Lost count of the up and backs but copious is how it should be described. Still time on the clock, potato was tossed to Rosie.

    Crab Walk, Bear Crawl rotation down to Robious Boat Launch where Pax proceeded to do a variety of Burpees and Merkins in preparation of upcoming bikini season. Swimming across the river was tossed out but declined due to no attending life guards, safety first. After bemoans of disapproval partner carries BTTVF was called with single rotation 1/2 back. Easy stuff.

    Numbers Names, Prayers and Announcements. Manly congratulations were dispersed.

    Announcements: Magnum PI day at DogPile manana. Dust of those fuzzy caterpillars and pressed Hawaiian digs for the annual finest weekend beatdown north of the river.

    Secret Santa is being organized. No friends, No problems, Match Maker Hutton will find you a soul mate for life, or atleast for Rosie’s 12 days of Christmas coming up on 12/23.

    Breaking Bread and The Bridge need people. Sign up you filthy animals.

    NMS: The following is how YHC remember things from today, and that opinion is the only opinion that matters. Great beatdown with Rosie as the smaller numbers are always fun to catch up with good people. Creative gift ideas proposed for family are always welcome. Rosie’s M has an art show going on tonight so come by and get some culture and help fund Rosie’s future retirement dream home, location still TBD. Great job today. Thank you Rosie for joining me.

  • Off Campus

    15 of the finest fellows came out to see if OC or YHC had the Q for a pre turkey day beatdown that took us to various parts of the AO. Here is how things went down.

    Mosey to the parking lot for introductions and disclaimers. Variety of in conversation exercises included SSH’s, Dead Man Hang, DQ’s, Helis, LBC’s, Suzanne Summers, Merkins, with a bit of broga.

    Mosey around the plush fields to a break in the woods, venturing across the street to the plush asphalt of the hospital.

    4 corners led things off. 10 HR merkins, 20 WWII’s, 30 squats, 40 Monkey Humpers.

    Partner up for a bit of Love Field (no hills in this parking lot). Runner runs across the parking lot, while partner bear crawls, lunges & broad jump burpees. Switch as needed.

    Partner up for a Dora. 100 Merkins, 200 WWII’s (not a good idea), 300 double count toe taps. Timer runs across the parking lot.

    Mosey back across the well manicured turf to the No Toll lot. Triple Check time. Timer runs the island. Partners perform Pole Smokers and Curb Crawls.

    MBTTVF at perfect time for numbers, names, announcements. YHC took us out with Snuff providing the post communal coffee.

    Announcements: Turkey Day Convergence on Thursday at Mary Munford, 7 am. Turkey Day Ultimate on Thursday at Timberwolf, 5.30 am. Double dip if you dare. Father/Daughter Dance in December – see slack for deets. Doozy is keeping SOT alive on Wednesdays. Go join in the fun with him. Gumbo and OC have Breaking Bread this weekend, December is currently open if you want to do some quality cooking for some great people. Safe travels over the holidays.

    NMS. Quality numbers this morning fellas. OC supposedly claimed the Q last night for a turkey day beatdown, but YHC saw the Q was open. YHC blames the government for these shenanigans. I am sure OC will seek swift retribution. Thank you boys for letting me lead. Safe travels to those that are out and about.

  • Story Time at the Forge

    A dozen of F3’s finest from various corners of RVA descended onto the plush turf of Huguenot High School in their winter finest for an unexpected beatdown. At the stroke of 5.30 we wandered down the hill stopping at the lower parking lot for introductions, disclaimers and a warm up that included the following: Invisible Jump Rope, Helis, Jazzercise with top taps, Mountain Climbers, LBC’s and some light stretching with some tales of past beatdowns from Heist.

    All seemed warm so we mozyied thru Machismo Gate and onto the plush synthetic turf fields. The main course today was the MICHIGAN, to warm up the cooler temps. Moans of disappointment were audible but did not deter the mission at hand. Line up at the goal line. 10 rounds of 100 yard sprints, 8 rounds of 80, 6 rounds of 60, 4 rounds of 40, 3 rounds of 30, 2 rounds of 20 and 1 round of 10. Stretching was encouraged between each round and well received.

    Still time left so we leave the cozy confines of the field for some lunge walking up the ramp, bear crawls up the hill, 20 Freddies at the parking lot while finishing up with some plank mary at the flag.

    Numbers, Names, Announcements, Prayers. YHC took us out.

    Announcements/Prayers: EF Hutton is leading the Bridge this weekend, see slack if interested in going. Thanksgiving convergence occuring in 2 weeks. Need a Northern Q to debate Handshake on the true beginnings of Turkey Day. Chili Cookoff next Sunday. $100 to anyone that makes Nancy Lopez puke through natural flatulence. Prayers to Wildcat and his family as they go thru ongoing health concerns.

    NMS: After listening to the origin of renaming inverted scorpion kicks to Roscoes’ Mom, thank you Heist; YHC dug through the deep annals of F3 Folklore to dust off some classic routines that may be new to some of the younger PAX members. Everyone knows Mankillers, so lets go with the Michigan. There are no good experiences from participating in this beatdown but the lined turf field was an outstanding host for this event. Never again will YHC Q the Michigan at the Forge but other PAX members may now add it to their arsenal of exercises. Times were had by all, some good and some not so much. YHC is probably going to be on Handshakes unfriendly list soon after unexpected beatdowns. Well done fellas. Great to warm up on a cool morning with you.

  • Mind the Turtle

    5 RVA studs were welcomed by 4 neighborhood deer in the predawn hours for a bit of FW Broga. Cool conditions were anticipated but embraced. Areas of emphasis included calves, hammys, shoulders, back, glutes and quads. Cooler and brief shavasana but quality non the less. Some PAX arrived late or not at all due to attempts to engage in warmer activities. This could not be confirmed or denied. Great work fellas.

  • Blankets would be Nice

    Five of the best looking brogiis came out to enjoy the brisk conditions for a little pre FW broga. Areas of emphasis included back, shoulders, quads, hammys, calves and groin. Shavasana was a bit chilly with the ever-present breeze, but good times were had by all participants. Well done fellas.

  • False Alarm

    4 Broga regulars enjoyed the starry skies and supposed single shooting star early this morning. Various emissions were discharged by Pax while getting in some quality mumble chatter and higher quality stretching. Emphasis on the back, quads, shoulders, calves and hammys. Shavasana was attempted to be cut short by YHC only to be corrected by the accurate time keeper. Who doesn’t enjoy additional shavasana. Well done fellas.

  • Moans or Groans

    7 loungey veterans were joined by an FNG and a 4 legged companion for a casual beatdown followed by a flavor infused coffeeteria. After cafe set up and turning on the pot, we ventured out into the darkness towards the High School. Here is where we circled up for introductions and disclaimers. Warm Ups included invisible jump ropes, dead man hang, helis, DQ’s, Imperial Walkers and maybe a few other erect exercises. YHC was humbly reminded that there is not counting in the lounge and quickly pivoted to conversational warm ups.

    Mosey to the front of the school for triple checks. Timer runs the loop while partners perform hoedowns and balls to the wall. 3 rounds completed so we mosey on to the football stadium entrance. Singer and his K-9 Ruby found us here bringing ideal numbers for a quadruple check. Timer runs out into the parking lot and around the vehicle while partners perform pole smokers, squats and carolina dry docks. 3 rounds completed.

    Mosey into the parking lot for brocode exercises to the grassy area. Bearcrawl to the 1st light and perform 1 burpee. Lunge to the 2nd light and perform 1 squat. Reverse lunge to the 3rd light where Singer abided by the social contract of cleaning up after Ruby.

    Mosey back to the school for some bench work in close proximity so we could all share our feelings along with dips, step ups and incline merkins.

    BTTVF for quick stretching, numbers, names and announcements. Welcome Rousey, hope to see you back out in the future. Originally Baby Billy but given the connection to MMA, was later changed to Rousey.

    Announcements: see slack for Machismos Burger Night and fill up Breaking Bread.

    NMS: Great turn out this brisk morning. Always nice to have Handshake enjoy a true lounge beatdown. Much mumblechatter including Froggys vacation attire and grooming habits, Rosie is renting a 40 person compound on the lake, Chaplain gets the weekend of no basketball gyms, while Handshake, Doozy and YHC continue to work on “projects” to limited success. Great work today fellas. Thank you for the opportunity to lead. Flavored coffee afterwards looked well received.

  • Tres

    Perfect conditions were embraced for a bit of broga north of the river by a trio of broga regulars. All participants busted out there verified broga mats to enjoy the creaks, pops and moans that accompany a quality stretching session. Areas of emphasis included hips, glutes, back, hammys and calves. Straps were distributed and properly used with no pending lawsuits unlike one not be named quarterback. Thank you boys for joining me this wonderful morning. Much quieter when Handshake fartsacks.

  • We have a Pavilion

    An ideal dozen came out to the hydrated fields of No Toll to enjoy the unexpected conditions that awaited us in the gloom. Sunny and 70 was the forecast, but that was not the case. Here is how things went down.

    Mosey to the parking lot for introductions and disclaimers. FNG was present so waivers were presented and properly notarized. Warmups consisted of a healthy dose of SSH’s, Dead Man Hang, Cherry Pickers, Jazzercise, Helicopters, DQ’s and other accouchements.

    Mosey to the edge of the pavement to begin a normal 4 corners. 10 Lt. Dans, 20 WWII’s, 30 Carolina Dry Docks, 40 Monkey Humpers (just in time for a witness to enjoy the view).

    Mosey to the far field for a Beast. 6 rounds, 6 exercises at 6 stops. Merkins, Bobby Hurleys, Imperial Squat Walkers, Carolina Dry Docks, WWI’s and Burpees were the selections.

    Mosey back towards the flag with a quick stop at the gates for quadruple check. Timer runs to the water tower, shoulder taps, arm circles, squats were the exercises. Almost 1 round completed before time was called. BTTF for numbers, names announcements, prayers and coronation of the FNG. YHC took us out.

    Announcements/Prayers: Broadway is at Chippenham with a minor heart issues. Prayers for him and his family for a swift recovery. Machismo is smashing some burgers this weekend for his church. See deets on slack. Welcome Marshmello. Neighbor of L Woods who enjoys spinning the tunes at various social events, sometimes without clothes. Swift recovery on the knee that popped during the beast and hope to see you back out at the gloom.

    NMS: It has been a while since YHC has enjoyed a good simple Beast at the lush fields of No Toll. Conditions were not ideal but we had to embrace the suck to obtain the full benefits of the Beast. Well done today fellas. Great mumble chatter as always and appreciate the opportunity to lead.