Author: Splinter

  • Those Are Mighty Fine Poles You Have

    Image result for line of poles

    Seven south of the river stallions gathered at SoT for a much anticipated (by the Q) visitor Q.  YHC was looking forward to the expedition for a few weeks and it didn’t disappoint.  Mosey down the hill to the middle of the football field for:

    COP
    SSH – 25
    Donald J Quixote – 15
    Russian Soliders – 15
    Arm Circles – 10x & 5x both ways

    The Thang
    Continue to the end of the football field and line up on the goal line for something YHC called Fun on the Football Field. Work down the field to the goal post, completing 100 yards and 100 of the exercise.  Run back to the start and plank for the 6.  Multiple rounds were:

    Round 1 – Stop every 10 yards and complete 10 merkins
    Round 2 – Stop every 25 yards and complete 25 WWIIs
    Round 3 – Stop every 50 yards and complete 50 2-count flutter kicks
    Round 4 – Run 100 yards and complete 100 SSHs

    Saunter back up the hill with an impromptu stop at the nicely spaced poles along the road.  Pole smoker indian run with 5 pole smokers while the rest hold 6 inches.  Complete three rounds.

    Meander towards the back of the school, thinking about the stairs but then calling an audible.  Lindsays (a.k.a Johnsonville’s wife).  Run the length of the parking lot and complete 30 merkins and 10 squats.  Run back then 25 / 15.  20/20, 15/25, 10/30.  Plankorama for the six.

    Quick sidewinder run towards the corner of the school for triple check.  BTTW, mountain climbers and run half-way down the hill to the random school crossing sign.  Why do you need a school crossing sign when  you are smack dab in the middle of school property?  Anyway, that was fun.  Someone was squeaky on the wall.

    Short ROF without singing then back to the flag.

    Numberarma, names then YHC took us out.

    Moleskin
    Thanks to the SoJ regulars for welcoming me this morning.  Always great to see those you haven’t run into in a while.  Also great to see some fresh blood keeping DK honest.  Rooster banter was continued from NoToll yesterday.

    It’s hard to believe no one had found the poles previously.  They are in clear sight and you actually have to try to miss them when running to/from the football field.  Glad I could point out something that hasn’t been done at SoJ before.  Can’t wait for another sub-freezing day to try something else new.

    For those that haven’t made the expedition to SoJ on a Wednesday it’s a great AO.  Small groups will push you even harder.  YHC highly recommends it.

    Announcements
    6:00 Turkey workout at Mary Munford tomorrow
    Someone won DKs survivor pool and it wasn’t me

    Have a great Thanksgiving everyone.

    Big Data is watching.

  • Swimming at Hoedown

    https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/fish_out_of_water.jpg

    Ten warriors, sans webbed feet, huddled in the crisp fall air before embarking on today’s hoedown.  Start off with a 3/4 mile run then huddle around the shovel flag.  Resist Conspiracy’s call to number off before tackling this ground ‘n pound.

    The Thang
    Repeat the following x2
    SSH – 25
    Merkin – 10
    WWII – 10
    Copperhead Squats – 10

    Repeat the following x5
    Merkin – 15
    WWII – 15
    Copperhead Squats – 15
    Worm Merkin – 10
    30 second plank

    Repeat the following x2
    Lunges – 10x each leg
    WWII – 15
    Flutter Kick – 30

    Mosey to the wall for triple check.  People’s chair, mountain climbers, and a lap around the loop.

    10x ring of fire then we were complete.

    Numbers, names and YHC took us out.

    Moleskin
    The idea for this workout started a few months ago when my daughter came home from swimming practice and told me they did a boot camp, after their normal swim practice.  She wrote it down for me and I filed it in the backlog for things to get to at an F3 workout.  Today seemed like a good day to test it out.  YHC added the run at the beginning and the triple check + ROF.  Everything else was stolen from her workout.

    YHC must have a reputation for patterns and numbers as the PAX was gleefully attempting to figure out the next exercise throughout the first two rounds.  Then they gave up.  Maybe out of boredom or perhaps out of exhaustion.  Today was no joke.

    For those counting, we did 155 merkins.  Apologies to Keymaster for attempting to run him off the road on Sunday.  It’s nothing against you, YHC frequently attempts to run people off the road.

    Announcements
    – Handshake VQ at Heartbreak tomorrow.  For those that want to run, UpChuck has Spider Run.
    – 1 hour Berkley plantation workout at Mary Munford Thursday morning at 6:00
    – Conspiracy has v1.0 of big data dating back to 2015.  According to his records F3RVA has a 70% abandon rate after the first post.  I think we’ve gotten better since then.

    Big Data is watching.

  • Obstructed Breathing

    12 galloping gazelles, one rover on two wheels, one owl whisperer, and one lanky giraffe gathered in the swamp that was Spider Run this morning.  No one signed up for the Q so YHC enthusiastically called River Run to avoid all the downed trees and power lines.  A few lower body tweaks here and there but no electrocutions.  All in all a successful morning.

    The Route
    Across the bridge.  4 milers do the half clover leaf and return.  5 milers to Rockfalls and return.  6 milers a few hundred yards past the Williams dam and return.  A few spartans braved Custis and reached the summit at Cherokee.  Kudos to Swirly, Sippy and Swiper? who made that decision.

    Moleskin
    The air was thick that day my friend.  Like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli.  The PAX got about 50 feet out before the great humidity beast appeared before us.  I tell you it was 100% if it was 10%.  As if sensing our presence, he let out a great bellow.  The PAX said… “easy big fella”.  Then as we all struggled, we realized something was obstructing our breathing.  From the path we were running we could see right into the eye of the great beast.

    From out of nowhere, a huge trough of stale air sat on us like an oppressive regime, it opened our pores and we found ourselves face to face with the great humidity beast  We had tears streaming down our faces.  We could barely see it was so thick, but we knew something was there.  So we slogged forward, step by step until we pulled out the obstruction.

    Image result for seinfeld titleist

    Titleist?

    Well, it was not a Titleist out there today but it certainly felt like I was running with an obstruction in my blow hole.  What a ridiculous morning to try and run.  Great job to everyone out there.  Go out and be the best that we can be, this weather has to be past us soon.

    Announcements

    Convergence this weekend, PuppyPile the following weekend, CSAUP 10/20.  Plenty of opportunities for brotherhood and fatherhood.

    #bigdata is watching

     

  • You Can Put Your Meat in My Freezer

    Image result for 9/11

    Thirteen gentlemen gathered flags and converged by the lake for a 9/11 themed version of Spider Run.  A few regulars expressed their frustration on the bathroom doors being locked.  Alas, instructions were given and off we went.  Those that had flags carried them for the run.

    The Route
    Everyone proceed up by the golf course, right on fairway and proceed up Iris to Three Chopt.  Right on Three Chopt and then left on Grove.

    4s – Left on Granite, left on Patterson, left on St Christophers, right on the access road, left onto Campus then back to the start.

    5s – Left on Roslyn which turns into Harlan, left on Patterson, left on St Christophers, right on the access road, left onto Campus then back to the start.

    6s – Left on Bunting, left on Patterson, left on Honaker, right jog to Boatwright, left on campus, back to the start.

    Numberama, namerama, wait for TYA then YHC took us out.

    Moleskin
    What a great morning for a run to reflect on what happened 17 years ago.  The run was mostly quiet this morning which provided ample time for personal reflection on the sacrifices people have made to provide for the freedoms that we take for granted.  Kudos to all that carried the flag today, either part way or for the entire route if your name is Swirly.

    Bleeder got the message last night and opted out of flag carrying and wore his c. 1997 Britches American flag rugby shirt.  Today was not a cool morning to wear a vintage rugby shirt.  Love the energy though.

    Announcements
    With the impending weather the latter half of the week, Shakedown suggested that we all use this group to support each other if someone is in need.  Shakedown graciously offered up a place to store your meat.  He indicated it was right beside his ammo store so don’t get any wild ideas.

    If anyone needs a generator see Kubota.

    Lots of CSAUP opportunities in the future.  9/22 Convergence, 9/29 Puppy Pile, 10/20 CSAUP, 12/2 Bear Creek 10 miler.

    Congrats to Lockjaw who posted his 200th time since #bigdata started collecting.

    #bigdata is watching

  • Dispelling Big Data Myths

    Dispelling Big Data Myths

    Having finally dug out and recovered from what was essentially a month of vacations for #bigdata (insert mocking comment here), YHC took the opportunity this morning to listen to the substitute podcast episodes 97 and 97.75.  Considering I get questions on how #bigdata works on a weekly basis, I figured now was as good a time as any to clarify exactly how it all works.

    1. It all begins with the backblast. Someone writes a backblast with the Date, QIC and the PAX list.  They tag a region and add a tag for the AO.  Nothing fancy here as this always happened.  If you don’t tag an AO than it isn’t in the AOs history.  The OCD in me hates this.  I often go back and clean up posts that don’t tag an AO.  Please tag an AO.  Yes, it should be a required field.  Blame WordPress for not making that as simple as it should be.
    2. #bigdata gets a update from f3rva.com as soon as a backblast is published.  It then takes the information from the backblast and creates a new “workout” in #bigdata, pulling out the Q, each individual PAX member, the AO and stores all that information.  Don’t ask questions like “why can’t you just read directly from the PAX line to get real-time updates?”  People ask me that question a lot.  Buy me a 2-3 high-ABV craft beers and I’ll explain it to you.  Saab may be able to explain it to you now as well since he has a fancy new degree.
    3. To account for inconsistencies in the PAX / Q names, there is an alias concept.  Every person that exists in #bigdata can have 1 or more aliases associated with that individual.  At this point, the alias association is manual (backlog item).  No, there are no machine learning algorithms in place (yet) to automatically associate a likely alias with an actual PAX member.  This is why I give Lockjaw so much grief for coming up with alternative spellings for Two Can whenever he feels like it.  Chuckle all you want but at some point I will get tired of linking aliases and then someone else will have to do it (or it won’t get done).  That is why I respectfully ask that people make a reasonable attempt to spell the name correctly.  I take time once a month to go back and clean up everyone’s misspellings, abbreviations, 19th century british literature equivalents.  No, it’s not the best use of my time.
    4. In the early days of #bigdata, that is all that happened.  As Honeydo put it, once the backblast was published, #bigdata was set in stone.  I had to intervene and make sure it was refreshed when there were changes.  Not anymore.  The backblast author has 2 days to make changes to the PAX list and it will still get updated.  No more complaining to me or texts during the day asking to refresh #bigdata, not necessary.  Don’t question why it is limited to 2 days.  I made a decision.  If someone wants to work with me on triggers in WordPress then we can eliminate the 2 day restriction.  Otherwise, it’s 2 days.  I consider this case closed.
    5. Epoch for #bigdata is 2017-03-19.  Why?  Because that is when I finished tested and released #bigdata to TYA and a few others.  Why didn’t I go back and add every previous workout?  Because that would suck.  It would be a tedious process that I wouldn’t even send offshore (sorry Offshore).  Could this be automated?  Sure.  I just don’t think it’s the best use of my time.  If someone is interested in taking this on as a side project I can make that happen.  Just buy me a few beers.  Preferably something that looks like orange juice so I know Swirly won’t drink it.
    6. Another myth debunked is that people that post pre-blasts get credit for a Q.  This is an absolute fallacy and was never the case.  In the early days of #bigdata YHC would clean up the data.  Basically this was me exerting my power to delete what I previously called phantom workouts.  TYA was a victim of this one time.  However, it was primarily used to delete preblasts from #bigdata.  This is no longer necessary as long as the author follows a simple rule.  Any backblasts with a date in the future get excluded from #bigdata.  So, if you are writing a preblast, put the date in which the event will actually happen.  Presumably that will be in the future or else by definition it would be a backblast and there would have been a Q and a PAX.
    7. Running Qs should count less than workout Qs.  I disagree with Honeydo on this one and it will remain equally weighted in perpetuity.
    8. The Q ratio was something I added as a humorous poke at Lockjaw when the joke was he was running near 100%.  He’s close.  Little known fact.  If you click on your name, your all-time q-ratio is displayed right above your graph.  The q-ratio on the attendance report is just your q-ratio for that period.  I love this stat as it reminds me when I haven’t Q’d in a while.

    I have a very short list of items currently on the backlog.  If you have ideas on how #bigdata can be improved, let me know.  Grab me in a workout, send me a note/text, whatever it takes.  I enjoy this as a hobby and may eventually get around to your request.

    Remember, #bigdata is watching.

    Splinter

  • Mont Henricus

    Image result for sir isaac newton

    Fifteen able bodied gentlemen challenged Sir Isaac Newton’s theories today as they climbed Mount Henrico.  Circle up just down the way from the commons for instructions:

    5 ‘ish mile route:
    – out campus by the baseball field to left on College
    – Right on Lakewood
    – Right on Wood
    – Left on Baldwin
    – Quick right on Westham then continue left on Baldwin
    – Left on Rock Creek
    – Quick left on Forest then right on University
    – Right on Glendale then left on Julian to the top
    – Return the same way

    4 milers follow the 5 mile route to University.  Then around Arlington circle before reversing course and returning.

    6 milers did Arlington circle on the up and back.

    COT with one quick exit then YHC took us out, thanking Newton’s discoveries.

    Moleskin
    Crowd pleaser this morning.  No complaints at all from the PAX for an oldie but goodie route.  The 5 mile route is a little heavy but wouldn’t want to short change those 5 milers from seeing the peak.  6 milers should be pretty spot on, although YHC had to double back for the six.

    Soup was thick this morning.  Great work by all!

    Splinter out

  • No Driving on Sidewalks

    Image result for car driving on sidewalk

    Six hoe regulars convened in the bus loop, waiting for the rain.  No one signed up so we stole from Batteau this AM and hot potato’d it.  Once the rain started, off we went to the front of the school for:

    COP (Splinter)
    Invisible Jumpropes – 25
    Copperhead Squats – 25
    Don Quixotes – 10
    Mountain Climbers – 20ish
    Merkins – 10

    The Thang
    Splinter continued from COP and we mosey’d over to the bus drop off lane for an impromptu series of polar bears.  Polar bear lunge the length of the bus lane, jump squatting after 5 lunges.  Turn around and come back the other direction with traditional polar bears.  Turn around again for lunge polar bears with broad jump burpees every 5 steps.  Attempt crab walk polar bear with 4 count crab cake on the way back.  Flipper completed, others switched to traditional polar bear half way through.

    Toss the potato to Flipper and he led the PAX to the car pool drop off loop for triple check.  BTTW, merkins, and a lap around the loop.

    Lateral the potato to Slurpee for the next round, Dora.  Exercises were merkins, flutter kicks, and squats/lunges.  Be wary of random school workers driving on sidewalks at 550am.

    Transition to the parking lot for a random assortment of Mary which included 6 inches, 2 rounds of ring of fire, 6 inches, single leg APDs, freddy mercuries and LBCs.  Juvenile comments were strong this am.

    COT where Pucker took us out.

    Moleskin
    Nice work by the PAX this morning.  There wasn’t a single exercise in the bunch where one could catch your breath.  That’s what a hot potato will do to you.

    During Dora, YHC had his eyes closed pumping out flutter kicks with the rain gently hitting my face.  I saw the car pull in the drop off loop and drive up on the sidewalk behind the PAX doing flutter kicks but didn’t think much of it.  That was until the horn blew and I looked up and saw a car about 10 feet away from me.  Whoever that was, had the nerve to drive up on the sidewalk, do a u-turn and then try to nestle right up beside the cafeteria wall.  All of this while there are about 25 parking spaces about 30 feet away.  Be on the lookout PAX.  That dude was just out of his mind.  Sorry Pucker, we may have done more flutters than necessary.  I was flustered and lost count.

    Great to see Fudd again and great to see Jack Sparrow becoming a regular at the Tuckahoe AOs.  YHC was surprised when the potato was passed to him during mary and he couldn’t come up with a single ab exercise.  He quickly replied, “I don’t do abs”.

    Announcements
    Amateur RAMM Gears day this Friday.  Bring your bike and have No Tools use his tools to fix it up.

    Splinter out

  • Manscaping Required

    blade, blade of grass, cut

    Twelve fleet-a-foot gathered near the commons for a birthday iteration of Spider Run.  Parking logistics were altered from the norm, causing a scattering of PAX members.  Eventually we all met up for:

    The Thang
    Warm up lap around the lake before convening at the base of gateway and richmond way.  Partner up for beat your partner to the spot.  One partner runs clockwise back up the hill towards the stadium while the other runs counter.  When you meet, tag hands and return to the start.  Repeat, attempting to beat your partner to where you tagged the first time.

    Quick shuffle along the path, through the woods to the base of towana and roselawn for hill repeats.  1 minute up roselawn at ~80%.  Recover back to the bottom of the hill in 1:45.  Repeat for a total of 6 iterations, attempting to meet or beat your previous apex on the hill.

    Mosey back to the flag for COT where YHC took us out.

    Moleskin
    This morning was a wonderfully warm and humid day.  YHC picked this day on the calendar back in January and have been thinking about how to challenge the PAX ever since.  We could have done typical 4, 5, and 6 mile routes but that wouldn’t have been very exciting.  Since we haven’t pulled out intervals or hill repeats in a while, YHC figured we could do both.

    Lug was likely disappointed he found us after our jaunt around the lake as he was probably about to embark on his own journey for the day.  Luckily Bleeder found him and he joined in with the rest of us.

    Singer was eager for instructions this morning, and as 530 approached all YHC said was 1 minute gentlemen.  I think everyone knew what was in store after that point.

    Great to see Rosie and Swiper punching their tickets today.  Both of them were crushing the hills today.  Speaking of crushing the hills, there was a little father / son battle one of the final repeats of the morning.  Swirly took off like a cannon only to have Grunt blaze his own trail to the top.  I’ll let either one of them disclose the results.

    Title of the BB today is fair warning to the PAX.  If you attempt to wear heart-shaped sequin tassel pasties (I’ll let you google that on your own) on your birthday while running, you may want to consider some localized prep in the area.  Saab suggested perhaps some more powerful adhesive or proper shaving of the area.  YHC did neither.

    Announcements
    CSAUP
    Puppy Pile

    Enjoy the day gentlemen.  I know I will.

    Splinter out.

  • Roxanne comes to Hoedown

    Nine of God’s finest creations assembled at Tuckahoe Middle School for a last day of hate beatdown.  We delayed for 2 seconds for Two Can to get settled and then off we went.  Mosey up to the blacktop for something like this:

    COP
    SSH – 40
    DQ – 13
    IW – 13
    Copperhead Squats – 13
    LBCs – 40

    Moleskin
    Quick saunter to the end line for a blacktop version of line drills.  This time we deconstructed a burpee then followed it up with burpees.  Run to the 1st goal, 10 merkins.  Run back to the end line then to the 2nd goal for 10 merkins and 10 jump squats.  Back to the end then to the 3rd goal for 10 merkins, 10 jump squats, and 10 leg thrusts.  Run back to the end line then to the 4th goal for 10 merkins, 10 jump squats, 10 leg thrusts, and 10 burpees.  Al Gore for the 6.

    Break out the speaker for Roxanne.  BT had flashbacks to the day he started hating Jville.

    Slow stroll over to the miniature field for triple check.  1 partner does jerkins while the other holds.  Third partner bear crawls down the hill and back.  Repeat for a total of 3 times.

    Jog to the front of the school to locate some bike racks.  Partner up for full extension merkinfest.  3 sets of 13 with the middle set being derkins.  Grab the bike racks for full extension on the decline.

    Dosey doe over to the teacher parking lot for a game of arrows.  Bear crawl between arrows and then complete 5 WWIIs at each arrow.  Modify after a few arrows to alternate between WWIIs and 4 count flutter kicks.  Plank for the 6.

    Mosey over to the cafeteria wall for triple check again.  This time exercises were BTTW, donkey kicks and a lap around the loop.  After 1 iteration, swap out BTTW with people’s chair.

    Circle up for numbers, names and COT with YHC taking us out.

    Moleskin
    What a wonderfully humid day it is today.  YHC couldn’t think of a better way to spend it.  The PAX was fully energized, especially when the speaker appeared, allowing us to complete 27 burpees in 3 minutes and 15 seconds.  28 if you are Mr Holland who got excited and added an extra.

    YHC bounced around the whole AO this morning, wanting to push himself to do a variety of exercises that are typically difficult.  Today was no different.  Thanks for playing along.

    Show up tomorrow at Spider Run.  Wedding Singer suggested we play a game of Edward 40-hands tomorrow.  Only those who post will find out.

    Announcements
    Puppy pile this weekend.  Wedding Singer has a puppy to spare.

    Splinter out.

  • Audible Monday

    Ten of the region’s finest assembled in the waning crescent for a hot potato Q.  With the regulars gone, Hoedown is turning into a regular “who want’s it” staredown.  YHC took control this morning before passing the potato.  Mosey to the black top ocean for COP that went something like this:

    COP
    SSH – 25
    DQ – 10
    MC – 20
    LBC – 20
    Arm Circles – 15 each way
    Mosey back to the drop off loop just as Flipper arrives.

    The Thang
    Start off with Dora, the traditional way, not the proper way.  Partner 1 runs around the loop while partner 2 does an exercise on the hill.  Exercises were 100 incline (feet up the hill) WWIIs, 200 clockwork merkins (50 at noon, 3, 6, and 9), 300 single count lunges.

    Pass the potato to Slurpee who took us down Lindsay.  Modified polar bear back up the hill.  Seven stride bear crawl followed by 7 merkins.  I’ll call this the Slurpee Bear.  Repeat until you get to the 6th car then partner up and partner carry up the hill and back down to the bottom.  50 jump squats then sprint back to the VSF.

    EF Hutton took charge for mary, teasing us with something special he has been working on.  Alas, that will have to wait.  Mary included Freddie Mercuries, six inches, Wilson’s spaghetti party (two ways) then a ring of fire.

    Numberama, namerama, then Flip dog properly took us out.

    Moleskin
    Today was the day of audibles, lots of ideas that required modification.  YHC took two of those honors, first with the attempted incline WWIIs.  That was a complete disaster.  Audible to flat WWIIs.  The second audible of the day was cutting 300 lunges down to 200.  YHC was getting bored.

    Slurpee continued Audible Monday with two audibles of his own.  The Slurpee Bear was a pure smoker.  Third audible was to lunge as necessary.  Fourth audible was to only go 3 cars instead of the full 6.  I imagine this seemed like a good idea in his head.  Note to the PAX, careful calling on Slurpee during a hot potato.

    The PAX wasn’t very creative during COT when naming our FNG.  Ponch did a good job providing background but nothing juicy stood out.  We tried the first concert (Travis Tritt), after which the PAX stood at each other trying to pull a Travis Tritt song.  Flipper finally pulled Trouble.  Sabotage indicated the FNG was light on his feet running up the hill, which prompted Twinkle Toes.  No one was excited about it but we rolled with it as there were no other creative options.  While driving home, YHC noticed that the license plate for our FNG was “JZY JFF”.  After a post workout conference with the Qs and Flipper, we settled on Carlton.  Ponch, let your boy know he is now Carlton not Twinkle Toes.  You are welcome.

    Ring of fire with dealer’s choice merkins was a sight.  Especially Two Can demonstrating proper hand clap merkins.  Boy can get off the ground.

    Well done all.  See everyone soon.

    Splinter out.