Author: Upchuck

  • Where’s My Hat?

    The Great 8 skated to another win over the Fart Sack in the latest edition of The Hoedown. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the guy with a light in his pocket, the following might have happened:

    Mosey to the street, grass, circle, grass, steps, and grass for the COP.

    100 SSHs
    Dead Man Hang
    Fudd’s Wife
    Right Leg High, then pigeon
    Wilson’s Wife
    Fudd’s Wife
    Left leg high, then pigeon
    HRMs
    LBCs
    Flutters
    Box Cutters
    Imperial Walkers

    Mosey Across Forest to the 3rd Church (Don’t you dare call it Third Presbyterian)

    Partner Up. Dora 1-2-3. Each man does 50 ‘mercans, then the team does 100 4-count flutter kicks, and 200 SSHs. 3 boo-yah ‘mercans with each transition.

    Mosey to the front of the school. Elevens. ‘Mercans and squats. Try to pick the right tree, or run to the bottom of the stairs, you choose. Reverse crunches for the six.

    Mosey to various spots on the front lawn. Circle up. Do things like WWIIs, flutter kicks, hello dolly, and so forth.

    Mosey BTTVSF. Numbers, names, and YHC took us out.

    Announcements:

    Joey’s Hot Dogs. Tuesday. Noon.

    3rd F Opportunities:

    As mentioned recently in the interview with Dark Helmet that many of us read (and which was posted on Slack), the 3rd F is not about religion, but about getting yourself right with the world around you (for some folks, this can be religious or religion might be a part of it). The key aspect is to contribute to things bigger than yourself. Many guys contribute extensively (and some guys…we would encourage them to join us, support us, and make an impact). Whichever you are, let’s go!

    Breaking Bread continues. For those newer to F3RVA, this is F3RVA’s long-time volunteer opportunity, going on about 9 years. If you haven’t taken the opportunity to contribute, check it out. Sign up on the Q Sheet, contact Oyster for directions, and make a difference.

    The Bridge is back…this is a transitional facility where guys moving from the prison system to the free world learn skills that will, hopefully, help them to earn a living and stay on the straight path. We had tremendous success this fall, and we’ll have dates for the spring shortly.

  • Thank you. Thank you. The Circus is in town.

    One very thankful, black t-shirt wearing American said thanks for the opportunity to celebrate 9 years and 5 months of The Clinic. Temperatures, thankfully, were 70 and sunny. According to the front desk clerk (thank you for staying, Mr. Upchuck), the following might have happened.

    Ran north thankful for the pleasant breeze. Then, Fudd at the office (thankful for the nice tp). Further north, until Broward, looped back and retraced the route. Just shy of 5.

    Number, name, and YHC took himself out.

    NMS – The Circus is in town, both metaphorically and actually. Anyone in the vicinity of the Westfield / Broward Mall Metroplex (Gumbo?) should come on out if you have the guts and / or the wrench set required to enjoy safely a circus carried on 20 tractor trailers. Sketchy.

    Question of the morning – which PAX member could you picture working at The Circus? Which ride / attraction?

    Announcements: already made.

  • 5@5

    1 ran 5 at 5.

  • Seventy

    One hit the mean streets of Plantation in the latest edition of The Clinic. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the Plantation police department staking out the La Quinta, the following, well, since they were watching the hotel, they have no idea what happened.

    Lake loop, cross Peters, parking lot (no fudd), 6th, Broward Mall, reverso at Broward and same route backwards back to the virtual shovel flag.

    Number, name, and YHC took himself out.

    Announcements / NMS:

    Wawa opened next to Starbuck’s. Talk about fighting inflation.

  • My Roommate Was Fired For Grabbing His Nuts While Taking a Pizza Order

    Four scored a block-tastic beat down before seven this morning at the latest edition of The Hoedown. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the ladies learning to Zing Fit, the following saga will be proudly recounted:

    Form up at the white arrow. THIS white arrow, not over THERE.

    Run the loop, then the steps, then the weirdly angled handicap ramp that turns inexplicably into stairs and back to the wall.

    COP:

    SSH. Just one. Fail.

    SSHs. Just two. Fail.

    SSHs. 100 x 4 count. Mostly success, until YHC changed the cadence and threw everyone off. Q Fail.

    Dead Man Hang. Fudd’s Wife. Right leg high. Left leg high. Pigeon left. Pigeon right. Recover. Left leg over right. Right leg over left.

    Hand release merkins x20.

    WWIIs x10.

    Imperial Walkers x10.

    Mosey to the auxiliary to the secondary church parking lot at 3rd Church. (Fun Fact – Third Church officially ranks 7th in Virginia in the number of parking lots among suburban class AAA Presbyterian Churches, but only 28th in the number of parking spaces, giving it the smallest average number of spaces per lot in the assembled general presbyterian session. Yet, 3rd received an NPS of 79 in the quality of the parking.)

    Four Corners – Prostitute Style (Always come back to the same corner)

    Grab a block. Carry the block. Corner 1: 10 curls, then back to the start. One squat.

    Corner 1, 10 curls, then Corner 2, 20 bench presses. Then back to Corner 1, then back to home base (repeating the exercises). Veterans know the drill.

    Senor Frog mentioned the team that won the Super Terrible Bowl last night. Burpee. Each subsequent mention…burpee.

    Corner 3, overhead presses. Then YHC’s shoulder started to feel enough pain that it was time for an audible. (Good use of the F3 Q School Rule: if you can’t do it, don’t Q it.)

    Corner 4, squats. (And, Corner 3 updated to swings).

    Someone said the name of the Philthadelphia football team 3 times. 3 burpees.

    Then, someone mentioned Beagles and Snoopy. Well said.

    Mosey to the front of TES. Touch-a-tree.

    Round of 10: SSHs

    Round of 4: something else.

    Round of 2: (Run to the trees…) merkins

    Round of 1: Burpees

    Mosey to the circle. Alabama Prom Dates until time.

    Numbers, names, and Hutton took us out with an invigorating prayer.

    Announcements: Frozen Triangle in 51 weeks.

    NMS: If you have a habit of grabbing your junk at work, which careers are appropriate for you?

    Not Appropriate: Clergy, medical provider, waiter at pizza parlor. Seriously, it will get you fired.

    Appropriate: football player (D-line, linebacker), baseball player (outfield)

    Never Appropriate: wavy haired, expertly tattooed, middle aged (yeah, I said it) man staring in the window of an office building before dawn.

    UpChuck spits the bit.

  • Who Doesn’t Love Running on Concrete?

    One lifted himself out of The Fartsack in the most recent central Florida edition of The Clinic. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the man walking his puppet-sized dog, the following might have happened:

    Leave hotel, turn right to find the path, nope, not there, turn around, proceed about 2 miles on the path, reverso, and BTTVSF. Number, name, and YHC mumbles to himself in front of the hotel.

    Announcements: YHC suggests that now is the time of year to go to Disney. Or, to an indoor call center technology conference.

  • Unseasonably Chilly

    One chose to throw off the warm lure of the Fart Sack at the latest edition of The Clinic. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the driver of the hazardous hospital waste removal truck barreling through the parking lot, the following might have happened.

    Northbound loop. Office park, cross Peters, Office park #2, up to 10th, to 78th, to Federated, to shopping mall parking lot, to Broward, and then reverso BTTVSF.

    NMS: Chillier than usual with game time temp around 58. YHC did neither SSHs nor any ridges.

    Call it 4.5 today. Not terrible, and the running legs are coming back after a fall hiatus.

  • Omega Route

    5 started together, another on his own, and another on his own in the latest edition of Sunday Funday. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the lady walking her dog down by the canal, the following might have happened.

    Route (to keep from damaging trails): North Bank to the stairs. Up to the top. Reverso. Back down the hill, stairs, and slides…back across North Bank to the parking lot…up Love Hill…curl left around The Amphitheater…to the pull up bars…down the Pipeloop…across the road…across the bridge…hard right…to the end of the trail…reverso…back to the Pipeloop, pull up bars, Amphitheater, Love Hill, and the parking lot. That’s one. 3.5 miles.

    YHC did just under 5 total. Other guys did 2 or 3 loops (TBD).

    Anthrax did 14 miles in Forest Hill, but only the ones after daylight count.

    Numbers, names, and there you have it.

  • All Carrot, No Stick

    6 wabbits gathered together and another on his own for the latest edition of the run at Sunday Funday. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the super outgoing young lady who runs with her dog, the following might have happened:

    Three options:

    10 miles with Saab on the roads…launch early to make Libbie Market

    6-ish with Sippy Cup, Helix, and YHC…North Bank, Belle Isle Loop, and North Bank again.

    Almost 7 with Anthrax, Shakedown, and Offshore…North Bank, Buttercrunch, and BTTVSF.

    NMS: Today was a 24-carat experience. Great dudes, good chatter, and great weather.

    YHC has been absent from Sunday Funday for a bit. It’s going to take a few weeks to work back into shape. Parts of today were a slog, but the dangling carrot of pork products, coffee, and biscuits at Libbie Market kept the motivation high.

    Prayers to those whose homes and lives have been impacted by the fires in California.

    Note: TYA has updated his office hours. In a pinch, he is available late evenings on Wednesday for shallow water swimming sessions. No advance booking is required.

  • It’s This, or MABA

    Nine rational, analytical, thinking men challenged themselves to improve in a non-compulsory, burpee-free fashion. Temperatures hovered at 70 and sunny. According to the lone computer worker taking a ten person table at Starbucks’s, the following might have happened.

    Mosey to the basketball courts for the COP.

    SSHs – 4 count x50
    Dead Man Hang
    Fudd’s Wife
    Left leg high, right leg high, right leg + left hand, left leg + right hand, Wilson’s wife, pigeon right, pigeon left
    Roll over for Freddie Mercury
    Flutter kicks
    Inverted Scorpion kicks

    Mosey to the school wall for a triple check.
    Partner 1: run to the fence, Bernie Sanders back x2
    Partner 2: fire hydrants
    Partner 3: V-ups

    Kudos to Circle K (not present) for the exercises.

    Mosey to the picnic tables for Elevens. YHC likes to provide options, so here goes. PAX choice – elevens of pick-your-choice merkins and WWIIs, or 100 burpees, for those who want to Make America Burpee Again (advice to Qs – if there is a monthly challenge that you want to do, then do that challenge, but little sense in making someone else do your challenge). FWIW, 3 men, one injured, chose the challenge…and did 50 burpees. 6 did Elevens.

    Mosey to the parking lot. Line up along the first parking space for 1-2-3’s. Gracias to Senor Frog (not pictured). Pick 3 exercises for the first parking space. Do 1 rep of 1, 2 reps of the second, and 3 reps of the third. Move to the second parking space by a method of your choice. Pick 3 DIFFERENT exercises (no repeats). Continue to the third, fourth, fifth parking spaces, and so forth. The PAX covered about 10 parking spaces.

    Numbers, names, and Lockjaw took the cold call to take us out.

    NMS: Nice to have Pull Out at Mary today. Great to see an old face again. In other news, 52 was enough to take the War Daddy title at Mary today. Has to be the youngest War Daddy at Mary for a while…YHC guesses maybe the youngest WD title for the year. Only 51 Mary’s to go…

    Announcements: VMI grad and solid, long-term PAX member Fudd has the Q at The Bridge on January 25. Jump in the Clown Car with him and head out to help some men grow and get their lives on track.

    Also, not mentioned, but at least one of the guys who graduated last month has a job maintaining equipment at a golf course. Let’s support these guys on their journey.

    Breaking Bread is the last weekend of each month. For those guys who are new-ish, Breaking Bread has been F3RVA’s unofficial, but somewhat official, volunteer activity for roughly 9 years. This is part of our DNA in the community. Over the years, a different PAX member has taken the lead recruiting PAX members to attend (Hardywood, Lab Rat, YHC, and now Oyster have all taken turn owning this over the years). Simple process: PAX member signs up on the Q sheet, then the PAX member(s) make dinner for the guests, usually 8-12 people, at the Southside Medical Respite Clinic. It’s great to stick around, meet a few people, maybe play a board game, watch some TV, or just chat with the guests. This is a super way to have your family help out in the community. Oyster leads our efforts these days. We do this 2x per month, always the fourth weekend, and, if everyone takes a turn, we have a few years of Qs ready to go! Sign up on the Q sheet!