Author: Bodo’s

Four bedraggled men, dealing with too much pollen and too little sleep, found their way to Mary for a 45 minute beatdown. Four other randos were sauntering around while we four commenced at 0530. Here’s what happened.

COP warm up on the blacktop

Beast! on the tennis court. 6 sets of excercises with 6 modes of travel, with 6 stops along the way. Round 1: Run and Squats. // 2: Lunges and Merkins // 3: Bernie Sanders and WW2s // 4: Side Shuffles and Carolina Dry Docks // 5: Bear Crawl and Monkey Humpers // 6: Run and Burpees . Mosey back to the blacktop

Dora with a partner . 100 Monkey Humpers, 200 LBCs, 300 Side straddle hops

Jerkins and Squats: 3 sets of 10 each. Mosey back to the Flag

Final COP, Ab exercises x25IC. American Hammers, Freddie Mercuries, Scissor kicks

Numberama, Namerama, YHC took us out.

NMS: None of us slept very well but it was good to be together. We appreciated Senor Frog dressing up for us. Handshake hears some crazy stories when he goes into people’s houses every day. Oyster is thankful that we think he’s so funny.

Prayers for Principal Muzik of Mary Munford, who was hit by a car on his bike on Tuesday and has 2 broken arms, a broken hip and leg.

Nine fine gentlemen, at least 2-3 of which are very bald and 1 of which has more hair than ever, gathered for 45 minutes of Mary this fine morning. The clock hit 0500 and off we went.

COP on the Blacktop. Deadman hang // helicopters // DQs // Cherry Pickers // Ukrainian Soldiers // Merkins // Elbow Plank Punches // High/Low Boats + Flutters

Four Corners on the Blacktop: 10 Squats each corner // 20 Merkins x4 // 30 LBCs x4 // 40 SSHs x4. Bonus Round! 5 Burpees x 4. Mosey to the picnic tables

Triple Check #1: P1: Box Jumps , P2: Mtn Climbers , P3: Run to sidewalk and back. Mosey back to Blacktop

Triple Check #2: P1: Dips, P2: Wall Sits, P3: Run to the Pull up bars, 5 pulls ups, run back. Audible after 2 rounds, back to the Flag

Concluding COP: High Knees and UpDowns for the final minute

NMS: Hitchiker’s kids have been taking his phone and snapping photos of his bald spot- which in turn propelled him in a fit of insecurity and panic to subscribe to Hims ™ Hair regrowth product for men. Hitch is convinced that his locks are now more luscious than ever, even as 1-800 informed us of the untold number of lawsuits currently out against “hair growth” companies. Hitch suggested that Faceplant and Upchuck give it a shot, which they demurred. Next week we will do a review of Hims ED product, which seems to cause hair loss.

A lucky seven (sans Handshake despite his vow to be there) met on a frigid morning for a beatdown. We ventured out at 5:29 because we could barely stand it to sit around in the cold for another minute. Here’s what happened:

COP: beginning with DQs, Saab was not pleased. Various regulars here.

Seven of Diamonds: Running and stopping at each of the 4 corners of the blacktop, perform the following: Round 1: 7  squats // Round 2: 14 Merkins // . Round 3: 21 LBCs // Round 4: 28 2x Mtn Climbers // Round 5: 21 2x Flutter kicks // Round 6: 14 Carolina Dry Docks // Round 7: 7 Burpees. 28 Burpees done, only 73 to go ! #maba

11s in the Pavilion. start with 10 pole smokers, bear crawl to other Side of the pavilion, 1 Jump Squat on the pole. And so forth

Choose your adventure: at this point, there were 10 minutes remaining. Those participating in #maba could commence burpees, those not participating did rounds of dips and merkins. UPCHUCK- NO ONE WAS FORCED TO DO MABA FYI

COT: Namerama, YHC took us out.

NMS: Great morning of frigid air, warm conversation and lots of mockery. Well done crew! SYITG

Gumbo, be warned: if you miss another Q, Swirly may actually log in to Slack and make a fuss.

7 gentleman plus 2 geriatric walkers gathered without Gumbo this morning, so YHC grabbed the Q at 0529. Off we went.

COP on the Blacktop. standard fare. Mosey to the tree line.

Chutes and Ladders: Run 2 trees, Bernie back 1, drop and do 5 reps of the called excercise. Round 1: Squats, Round 2: Merkins, Round 3: LBCs. Mosey to corner of school.

Triple Check: P1: Wall sit, P2: dips, P3: run to pull up bar, 5 pull ups, run back. Mosey to Tennis courts.

Dora: 100 Merkins, 200 2x American Hammers, audible called, mosey back to the flag.

COP: end with 50 IC Pickle pounders.

SMS: Welcome Mountain Man from Columbus, Ohio! Lots of debate about the proper way to conduct chutes and ladders. Lots of moaning and groaning during the Pickle Pounders. Great group, great way to start the day! SYITG

Five hombres guapos found their way to Mary for a hot potato Q. The slightly higher temp was counteracted by a very cold and strong wind, making this potato slightly less warm. All 5 of us managed to hold the potato, even for a couple of minutes. Here’s what happened:

Bodos: COP on the black top, then 7 of diamonds: 7 rounds of 4 corner excercises in increments of 7. Rounds were: 7 jump squats / 14 merkins / 21 LBCs / 28 Squats / 21 Carolina dry docks / 14 2x flutter kicks / 7 Burpees. Potato passed to Swirly

Swirly: 20 Dips, Sprint, 20 Incline Merkins, Sprint, 3 rounds of 5 Pull ups. Pass to Oyster

Oyster: Bear crawl back and forth a few times. Broad jump burpees, other stuff I can’t remember

Vandalay: Back to the chin up bar. 3 rounds of 5 pull ups + 3 rounds of 5 dips.

Senor Frog: COP – merkins

Namerama, YHC took us out.

NMS: Vandalay shared about an FNG who reported that he wouldn’t come back to F3 because the Pax he was with were cheating on their form and not performing full proper squats. This made Swirly very upset and we had to console him and promise him we would never let this happen again. Our form was excellent this morning.

SYITG.

It is truly remarkable how quickly a group of middle aged men at 5:30 in the morning can turn nearly any topic into sex and genitalia jokes. This morning, it took about 34 seconds for these ten OGs of the gloom to do so, and it just kept on going. As for exercise, here’s what happened:

COP at the intersection of Commonwealth and Hanover. DQs, Ukrainian soldiers, etc.

Burpee Alley: Run all the way down Hanover to Shadwell, 3 burpees at every lamppost. From there, mosey down shadwell, west on grove, stop at the parking lot of Jenny Maraghy real estate.

Wall to Wall: Partner up. Round 1: P1 runs to wall and performs 10 donkey kicks, P2 Wall sits. 3x. // Round 2: P1 runs to wall and performs 10 Chicken peckers, P2 wall sit. 3x. // Round 3: P1 runs to wall and performs 10 dirty hookups, P2 wall sit. 3x. Mosey east down Grove to Lock Lane, then over to First Pres Parking Lot, stopping intermittently for 3 burpees along the way.

Triple Check: At some point after the last set of exercises Hitchhiker abandoned us, so numbers were perfect for triple check. P1: Squats // P2: LBCs // P3: run to the playground fence, bernie sanders back. Mosey back to the school, stopping along the way intermittently for sets of 3 burpees.

COP: ring of fire, sets of Freddie Mercuries, American Hammers, Crunchy Frogs. Finish with 3 Burpees.

NMS: What a great morning, we covered a ton of ground and worked every muscle. Lots of laughter, which is pretty much a guarantee with Saab and TYA in the mix. Great to have Vandalay back. Seymore broke up the COT with a serious stench.

SYITG!

You know that scene in Legally Blonde when the mean girls invite Elle to a costume party, and when she shows up she’s the only person in costume? That was me this morning. I was somewhat consoled by the fact that Choo Choo’s M tricked him the last 2 years with the same prank. Last year he was Rick Flair, this year he was a wizard. Imagine making small talk at a cocktail party and everyone is dressed normally, while you are in spandex or wearing a long grey beard. That was Choo Choo. This morning, despite my appeal to dress up, I was Bat Man and everyone else was just the plain old pax. I really wished Choo Choo or White Snake was there.

After handing out treat collection bags, we started our Trick Or Treat Beatdown with a short mosey to the corner of Westmoreland and Grove. Here’s what happened:

Treat #1: 11s. 10 dips at the picnic tables, run to the sidewalk, 1 merkin. 9 dips, 2 merkins, etc. After 11s, treat #1 was distributed: full length carrots, in honor of Ms Winkle who always gave healthy treats on Halloween and then we would egg her house. After receiving the long hard carrots many penis jokes commenced. Mosey to Westmoreland and Cary.

Treat #2: Run the tree line, stop and perform 5 squats at each tree. Run back, perform 5 WW2s at each tree. Treat #2 was distributed, a reeces cup and pack of gum. Jokes about melting chocolate in our pockets commenced. Mosey to tennis courts.

Treat #3: Triple Check. P1: Plank Jacks, P2: Jump Squats, P3: run to the end of the courts, Bernie sanders back. Treat #3 was then distributed, the original lemon lime gatorade. Complaining from Handshake commenced. Mosey back to the start.

Treat #4: 4 corners. 40 2x Flutter kicks / 30 Carolina Dry Docks, / 20 2x Imperial Squat Walkers, / 10 Burpees. Lunging and Bearcrawl between corners. Finish with a Ring of Fire, ab excercises called. Treat #4 distributed, PBRs. We tried to make our downranger shotgun the beer as a hazing tactic, but he declined.

Namerama, Numberama, YHC took us out.

NMS: I love this group because we know how to push ourselves hard and laugh and make fun of ourselves the whole time. Let’s keep doing it. Thanks guys for playing along.

SYITG

A mighty 13, including some long lost cotters, converged for 45 minutes of Mary on the 10th day of the 10th month of the year. After some happy greetings and mockery, the workout commenced. Here’s what happened:

COP on the blacktop. Standard fare

10 Rounds of 10 Sets of 10 Excercises

>> 1st round- Blacktop

10 merkins – 10 squats – 10 LBCs. 10 stations, mosey between stops.

>> 2nd round – Soccer Fields

10 SSHs – 10 plank jacks – 10 WW2s. 10 Stations, mosey between stops.

>> 3rd round- Field

10 Jump Squats – 10 Carolina dry docks – 10 2x flutters. 10 Stations, mosey between stops

>>Back to the flag for the Final Set: 10 Burpees.

Numberama, Namerama, YHC took us out.

NMS. Great to see some old pals like Slurpee, Sugar Sock, the Mayor, and Slippin Jimmy. We did not have time to do 10 rounds of 10 burpees at the end as planned. Everyone was very disappointed but all agreed enthusiastically to do 9 more sets of 10 burpees throughout the day. The highlight of the day was Gumbo describing Senor Frog’s Running style: “Burst then Hairball, Burst then Hairball…”

With everything that is happening in the world, every day without death or catastrophe in your life is a gift of grace. Receive it, enjoy it, share it.