Author: Dr Tryhard

  • There Can Be Only JUAN!

    Eleven HIM’s converged at NoToll to play Ultimate Frisbee. Last Call looked like a well oiled Gumby sauntering over from a Solo Broga, dripping with confidence and namaste vibes. Juanita showed up with cleats and his own light up disc – which should have clued us all in. The following details the morning’s shenanigans, but it was clear – there can be only Juan! 

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey to the Field
    • Warm-up loop and place cones
    • Variable IC Warmup Reps
    • Teams randomized by counting off into Team 1 and Team 2, making it 5v6, with tiny JV pennies supplied by Juanita 
    • RULES: x3 Merkins for any player involved in a turnover, and x3 burpees for the losing team on each touchdown.

    GAME HIGHLIGHTS:

    It became immediately clear that Juanita was familiar with handling a disc, which was a good thing since the other team had Snuff who we all know is the dark horse of Ultimate (it would have been super bad if they were both on the same team). YHC ended up on the team of 6 and generously offered to have a man switch teams half way through to even things up… apparently, a slimmed down team of 5 PAX was the perfect number for the small field cause our early 2-2 score quickly took a turn for the worse as the five young guns ran a 6 touchdown streak, keeping YHC’s team exhausted with repeated burpees. Down 8-2, YHC verbally browbeat the lads into our own little streak with the final touchdown in Bone Thugs nimble fingers, valiantly losing 7-9 to the bad guys. 

    Noteworthy bad guys were Florence who will now be known as “The Hammer” for his unique and quite effective throwing style, Judge who is waaaayy faster than he lets on, Bullseye with his sneaky passing down the middle, and Last Call who will now be named “Mr Inertia” after body checking YHC (like a rag doll) off a catch and right out of bounds. It was not dissimilar to Orange Crush sending Snuff into a flat-spin, but to Snuff’s credit he held onto the disc for a touchdown. 

    Kudos to House Party for putting his height and fast hands to work, and it should also be recorded that while OC’s early efforts were generally disastrous, he made up for it with creating touchdown opportunities in our rally. A solid effort by all and a good number of merkins and burpees all around. Thanks for posting fellas. SYITG, DTH

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 11
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Below)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    Prayer Requests:

    • Healing for McGruff, Heartburn, and Labrat

    Announcements:

    • TODAY – SOJ Happy Hour at Triple Crossing
    • 7/21 – NavySeal Themed BoneThugs Q at The Forge (bring a squirt gun!)
    • 7/26 – Gumbo Q’s Home Run Derby
    • 7/26 – Pool Party HH at Snuff’s place
    • 7/28 – Dealer VQ at The Forge 
    • 7/29 – 3rd F at Starbucks (Broad&288)
    • 7/30 – Boberry Q’s School of Rock
    • 8/2 – Ultimate at Heartbreak Ridge
    • 8/4 – New Glory at The Forge
    • 8/8 – Daville Takeover all AO’s
    • 8/9 – 2nd F Lunch at Innsbrook

  • Pouring Perspiration, Parched for Precipitation 

    Departing the deluge of Bon Air and other points North, a strong PAX of 9 HIM’s gathering in the stifling humidity of Rock&Roll without a drop of refreshing rain in sight. No problem, we’ll bring our own sweaty rainfall to the AO. 

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey loop around the lot & circle up on the basketball court
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom (heaps of 8-counts)

    COP #1:

    • Ind.People’s Run to the Tennis Courts
    • LINDSEY:
    • Donkey Kicks 10-15-20-25-30
    • Chain Smokers 30-25-20-15-10
    • Run across x3 courts between sets

    COP #2:

    • Mosey via GRABASS back around the park loop – Q calls a PAX name, he takes off like a bat out of hell, first PAX to catch him calls x20 reps of their choosing. The Catch – front runners mosey back to the Six to perform the reps. 

    COP #3:

    • Mosey to the Picnic Pavilion for BODOS’ TABLE MADNESS:
    • #1: WINGNUTS – Sitting on picnic table, feet under bench, lean back to approx. 15 degrees with back and neck straight, fists touching in front of chest so that elbows point parallel with shoulders, rotate waist so that each elbow touches the table top. 4-Count IC, x10 completed. 
    • #2: COYOTE UGLY’S – Partner Up – Starting in a wheel barrow position with partner, P1 starts on the ground and steps up to picnic table ‘seat’ with his hands, completes 1 Merkin, steps up to top of the table top , 1 Merkin, steps back down to the ‘seat’, 1 Merkin, steps back down to the ground, 1 Merkin. That’s one rep. Each Partner completes x5 reps.
    • #3: HAIL MARY’S – P1 elbow planks on ground, P2 places his legs on P1’s back and performs 20 dips with his hands on table bench. Each partner completes x3 sets of 20.
    • #4: WINGNUTS for another x10 IC

    COP #4:

    • MOSEYRAMA around park loop to the grassy hill
    • TRIPLE CHECK: 
    • P1 – Nancy Kerrigans (1-leg SSH)
    • P2 – Mtn Climbers
    • P3 – Convert from Mtn Climbers to Bear Crawl up the grassy hill, run down stairs to switch

    COP #4:

    • Mosey back to the large middle lot
    • Circle up for PLANK COMPASS – each PAX’ feet remain fixed in place, while hands plank walk X degrees in whichever direction Q calls, with x5 merkins between each new direction

    Mosey BTTF:

    • En Route, Lunge Walk x50 yards

    COT:

    • Counterama # 9
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • MICKEY took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  Well, YHC lost about 5 pounds in sweat, and you know it’s a good one when Six-Pack Jack is about ready to spill merlot towards the end. Granted, Mickey also puts in 110% for the entire 60min, which if any of the PAX attempted a bootcamp at his level, they’d be spilling within the first ten min – respect to you good sir! YHC was really looking forward to a beatdown in the pouring rain, but seems the rain was bent on staying north of Midlothian. Appreciated seeing Doublemint’s twins making a reentry to F3 after their recent first beatdown at Batteau. And if you have not yet seen Florence with a mustache, it is GLORIOUS! I swear he wears it better than most I’ve ever seen. Love pushing past the limit with you guys! SYITG, DTH

  • Punching the Penguin

    A handsome set of Forge regulars showed up for superhero training. It was humid, and exhausting, and a perfect way to choke out the Jester of excuses and sloth.

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey to the flagpoles and circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom
    • Mosey down to the lower lot

    Batman Workout: 

    • 10 sets is the goal
    • Each set:  x20 squats, x40 Punches, x10 Ball Dippers (2-ct), x10 Merkins, x20 Shoulder Taps, x20 Mtn Climbers (2-ct), x10 WWII Punches, x10 Straight Leg Raises, x10 Am.Hammers (2-ct)
    • After each set, run the parking lot loop

    Mosey BTTF:

    • En route hold Al Gore for Doozy putting the headlock on a local sad clown walker
    • Bernie up the hill BTTF

    COT:

    • Counterama # 8
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  So apparently great minds think alike, considering Florence did a version of this Batman Workout at R&R last Saturday while YHC was out of town. House Party was the only one who had the “pleasure” of double dipping, and informed me after that they’d done the x10 sets of each exercise in succession rather than in circuit. Either way, The Batman workout is a absolute smokefest. TClaps to Fresh Prince who finished all x10 Rounds and did an extra round while we ran down the clock. YHC completed 8, and pretty sure Doozy quite nearly got to 10. YHC closed out our COT with a testimony and encouragement to reconsider to quality and quantity of that which we consume, which the QSource specifically refers to as The Queen. It doesn’t matter how much we workout if we are loading our systems with junk. Choose something to give up for a day or a week, and use the ensuing hunger you feel for that normal indulgence to pray/meditate or consume something healthier. Accountability matters, so tell a brother what your doing. Love, DTH

  • Easy Like Wednesday Morning

    A faithful few posted to The Source, and it would have been an even split of runners and Tryhard enthusiasts, but Florence (a true Tryhard diehard) made a last minute switch to bootcamp it with the crazies. While the runners spent half the time walking the track, the good Doctor went easy on the faithful few with the following:

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey down to the lower lot and circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • Mosey over to the field & Circle up
    • Review BLIMPS:  x5 reps each exercise
    • Beast-mode BLIMPS completed across the extremely wet field and back
    • Audibled to the next Beast round on the track
    • Consensus achieved that was quite enough BLIMPS for the morning

    COP #2:

    • Mosey over to the stairs
    • TRIPLE CHECK LOOP:
    • x100 HRM’s
    • x200 Squats
    • x300 LBC’s
    • Runner box jumps up the steps then runs around to the other stairs and back

    COP #3:

    • Couple of sprints up the grass hill
    • Wall work with a couple rounds of Hoedowns IC
    • Plankorama with a few iterations of holding it low

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 8
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • DRAPER took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  Always a great time with the SOT brethren, and this morning felt particularly intimate and relaxed with fewer PAX. Prayers for all our brothers downrange with work and vaca’s. Pretty sure OC is hosting a Spirits&Sprints Convergence on the Fourth – you just have to do a shot of bourbon between each 100 meter sprint…. and he’s got some Salisbury cougars lined up to give chase… oof!  SYITG, DTH

  • Killer Kangaroo

    A couple PAX and their gaggle of 2.0’s converged for the June edition of School of Rock. After surviving the HPVQ, here’s how YHC cooled down:

    The THANG:

    COP #1:  Mosey to a lush outfield and set up for a soccer scrimmage – x5 merkins earned each time a goal scored.

    COP #2:  Classic Game of Tag, then Oreo introduced “Kangaroo Hunter” where everyone’s hopping around like a kangaroo except the hunter who had easy pickings (fairly realistic actually).

    COP #3:  WWII’s called in cadence to the song “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes”, getting faster each round. Also a couple other IC exercises. 

    COP #4:  Basketball court suicides, then another round of tag, this time called “Killer Kangaroo” wherein the kangaroo was it and everyone else was bear crawling to escape the hopping tag.

    Mosey BTTF for an informal COT over cold Gatorades & Granola Bars. NMS:  Fewer numbers today with some SoR regulars vacationing, but as you know “where two or more are gathered” was still a great time. Turns out when you let the kids come up with exercises, they’ve got some great (exhausting) ideas… all the more challenging when a certain (ahem Banjo) 35lb 2.0 wants to be a ruck the entire time. See ya’ll for a Boberry Q next month. ~DTH

  • Awkward Ball Handling

    A perfect dozen quadrapods gathered in the NoToll gloom, senses quickened and spirits aroused, already tasting victory over the flesh. Their curiosity was piqued as the Q rolled up with 30 seconds to spare having effectively prepped the AO…

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Moseyrama a bit then circle up on the Basketball court
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • Mosey out to the Field
    • Split PAX into 2 teams for CRAB SOCCER
    • Play for x10min, any goals earning the losing team x10 Merkins while the winners plank

    COP #2:

    • Take a break with FOUR CORNERS:
    • x25 WWII
    • x50 Squats
    • x75 Mtn Climbers (2-ct)
    • x100 LBC’s

    COP #3:

    • Switch it up to BEAR SOCCER for x10min
    • Any PAX kicking the ball out of bounds earned the kicker x2 Burpees

    Mosey BTTF:

    • En Route, pay the Toll at the bridge of x20 Dips & x20 Derkins
    • x1 Minute of Boat/Canoe

    COT:

    • Counterama # 12
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • HOUSE PARTY took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  With the SOJ Takeover in the history books, it was great to be back at NoToll. YHC rewarded the PAX faithful with some soccer ball “fun” today and all agreed Bear soccer is way more fun than Crab Soccer. Crab is slow and awkward, Bear is faster with full body tackles. DOOZY gets the gold star for the only goal scored today, mostly due to excellent (and illegal) goal keeping on the part of NANCY and ROPER. Everyone felt it in the shoulders, especially CHAPLAIN who earned the most burpees for booting it out repeatedly. YHC took out LAST CALL a couple times just for the fun of it! Anyway, nothing like mixing it up for a little summer fun – appreciate ya’ll posting! Best, DTH

  • Sun & Dust, Sweat & Guts

    Concluding a week of SOJ Takeovers, DTH brought the heat once again North of the wall… and there was Emoji, grinning ear to ear with a marshmallow ready on the skewer, eagerly anticipating whatever dumpster fire was about to take place. Here’s how we burnt the smores…

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey around back to Atlee blacktop and circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • CHUMBABURPEE – Musical warmup with ongoing SSH, broken up with a Burpee every time they sing “I get knocked down”!
    • A smattering of stretchy IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • Mosey over to the Bus Loop and partner up
    • CATCH ME IF YOU CAN:
    • P1 x3 Burpees while P2 Bernie’s …catch up and switch until lap completed, then go back for the SIX, then bear crawl the rest

    COP #2:

    • Mosey over to the school brick wall
    • Hoedown’s x10 IC
    • Dirty Hookups x10 Left + x10 Rt
    • EMOJI then produced on request a couple Carolina favorites:  
    • Mike Tysons x10 IC (plank with heels against wall, squat legs towards wall then push forward to merkin)
    • One-Legged Squats – other leg held behind x5, beside x5, in front x5 …done for each leg

    MERKINS FOR THE LADIES:

    • Plank up in a line for the walking ladies, and knock out x10 High Quality Merkins in their honor as they passed by

    COP #3:

    • Mosey past the Middle School to the dirt track
    • NO MERCY MILE:
    • x4 Laps around the track, each lap stopping at the 50yd line for either x25 Merkins or x25 Squats
    • Far end, Bear Crawl the curve (*Audible after the first lap to Bear Crawl grass instead of gravel for safety reasons…)
    • Near end, Lunge Walk the curve

    Mosey BTTF for SIX MINUTES OF MARY:

    • EMOJI demonstrated some No Cheat LBC’s where elbows touch knees, and we knocked out x10 IC
    • Rosalita Whips IC
    • Kimchi Twists IC
    • Flutters IC
    • DR W’s IC
    • DTH’s IC
    • Elbow Plank Alt Leg Lifts IC
    • Elbow Plank Alt Arm Punches IC
    • Stretch and slow the breathing

    COT:

    • Counterama # 7 (LIFO No Idea)
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • EMOJI took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  Dang gents, we are gonna feel that workout all weekend! Phew! Nothing like having the positive energy and enthusiasm of EMOJI to keep the PAX spirits up – it’s clear just how much the Daville guys have been missing you brother. Keep coming back! YHC was very impressed with the hard work these guys put in today to crush this beatdown of beatdowns. It’s always an honor to serve the hard stuff to those HIM’s who sink their teeth into it with relish. Thanks for having me Daville! Until next time, DTH

  • Takeover-N-Tunes

    A couple SOJ clowns took over The Creek this morning with a sweaty beatdown set to the tune of Chap’s 80’s hit list. Here’s how $900 in gasoline was made worthwhile…

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey to the BBall hard top and circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • SEVEN OF DIAMONDS:
    • Escalating reps each round, mosey on the long sides, bear crawl the short side
    • x7 Burpees ea corner
    • x14 WWII
    • x21 Squats
    • x28 LBC’s
    • x21 Merkins
    • x14 Walking Lunges(2-ct) alternated with x14 Ball-Dippers (2-ct) ea corner
    • x7 Heels to Heaven

    COP #2:

    • Sprints on the Soccer Field
    • 25%, 75%, 50%, 100%

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 5
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YARDSALE took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  Quality time and conversation had with Chaplain in our far distant clown-car travels. Great to see the Daville guys again this week – they dis a great job slamming through the beatdown today. And yes, YHC “will be back” (think Terminator voice). SYITG…very soon…DTH

  • Ripped Shirts & Wet Discs

    A perfect 16 HIM’s posted to Heartbreak for an SOJ Takeover game of Ultimate Frisbee. With humidity at 1000%, our West End hosts ensured the sprinklers were ON for refreshing showers throughout the game. Here’s how the PAX exercised all three F’s in style:

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey the field perimeter dropping cones (full length, but only 75% of the width), and then circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    THE GAME:  With absolutely perfect numbers for Ultimate, the PAX divided into Team Atilla with 8 dark shirts and Team Mariner with 8 light shirts. Rules were reviewed, and the decision made to forego burpees or merkins on turnovers. 

    While each PAX put forward amazing effort for their teams, here follows the most remarkable highlights of the game:

    • Early scoring by Team Mariner demonstrated definitive skill and coordination between Snuff and Bodos, and early grumbling by Team Atilla suggested uneven team skill levels
    • Team Atilla stopped counting when the score reached 3-2, but MVP’s Mariner, Snuff, and Bodos kept the TD’s going
    • Shout out to TI – The Ringer who’s never played
    • Upchuck won a small ribbon for “Most Hands On”, and Bodos’ shirt is proof if you let the bear give you a hug, you might regret it
    • Upchuck also earned 5 Burpees, the only given out, for batting the frisbee out of bounds over the fence – respect to the man for no complaints crushing the burpees
    • Bodos had 1st Place in Most Glorious (and frequent) Dives (pretty sure he’s actually just 25 years old…)
    • Handshake went beast mode in celebrating turnovers
    • Offshore has sneaky good skills
    • Our lone LIFO was Kubota, but only missed the last TD and COT

    FINAL SCORE: Team Mariner 10 // Team Atilla 3

    COT:

    • Counterama # 16
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • BODOS took the PAX out in Prayer

  • Ahhhh, That Nostalgic Smell of Brick Dust in the Morning

    What do you get when you mix sweat, brick dust, and a glorious 70 degree sunrise? Well friends, that’s the Forge beating HIM’s into razor sharp blades for massive Kingdom impact. Forever written into the anals of the revered Smokefest Scrolls, this routine will be one to tell the grandchildren:

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey the upper loop and circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • Mosey past YHC’s truck to collect the BRICK COUPONS (2 per PAX)
    • Alternate x5 Hand-Release (Brick-Slide) Merkins with x5 WWII (Holding Bricks overhead) at each light pole going down to the Culdesac (about 12 stops)

    ***LIFO brothers SNUFF & BONE THUGS arrive fashionably late, blissfully brickless, and were sent back to the top of the AO to collect their bricks – and off they skipped holding hands into the gloom…***

    COP #2:

    • Circle up in the Culdsac for IC reps of the following exercises WHILE holding bricks in hand:
    • “Brick Press Hops” – SSH’s but with Brick Press on top
    • Don Briqotez
    • Ukraine Soldiers with Bricks held straight out in front
    • T-plank Brick Circles, ea side
    • American Brick Hammers
    • 2-ct Flutters w Bricks held over/behind head

    COP #3:

    • Mosey back up to the lower lot with one Brick Burpee at each light pole (***pick up SNUFF & THUGS en route***)
    • DORA: Moving partner Brick Crawls (bear crawls with bricks in hand) to the top of the grassy hill, then runs down to switch.
    • x100 HRM’s (Brick-slide Merkins)
    • x200 Straight Leg Raises (bricks held above/behind head)
    • x300 Moroccan Night Bricks

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Group Picture with Bricks 
    • Counterama # 10
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS: We may never use our thumbs again, but it was worth it! Shout out to JUDGE celebrating his 33rd Birthday today – YHC hopes you see this little workout as the best possible gift. The sky was unreal as we started the morning, and the sweat was pouring by the end. YHC had a moment of deep nostalgia while doing Brick Slide Merkins, as childhood memories of shooting cap guns filled my mind (apparently similar to the smell of brick dust on pavement). GREAT work today crushing this workout fellas – appreciate ya’ll investing the labor of love. SYITG, DTH