Author: Dr Tryhard

  • Help from the Mountaintop

    In the misty gloom of Windy Gap a handful of F3RVA natives rallied a few brothers in Christ to beat the fartsack and embrace something glorious. Here’s how the first morning of the annual men’s retreat kicked off:

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Circle up on the Basketball Court
    • F3 Welcome & Disclaimer for the FNG’s
    • Review of the Core Principles and Credo
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • Mosey and partner up for a DORA
    • x100 Merkins
    • x200 Squats
    • x300 LBC’s
    • Moving partners bear crawl up the hill and mosey back around the loop

    COP #2:

    • Indigenous People’s Mosey to the back parking lot, last man completing x2 Burpees before sprinting to take the lead

    COP #3:

    • Line up for ELEVENS
    • Ball Dippers (2-ct), descending 10-1
    • WWII’s ascending 1-10
    • Run between sides of the lot

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama #7
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Below)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  About 400 men gathered on the mountain in southwest NC for the retreat, this being the 47th year of annual meetings of the Fellowship. Last year YHC attended for the first time on invitation from Greenbow and there was no question that we would return. YHC was blessed to bring along Seadoo this year, and we enjoyed Doozy’s company along with a handful of other Virginia men. It is without any doubt the most spiritually refreshing experience of my adult life. Feeling exceptionally thankful, YHC, DTH

    I lift up my eyes to the mountains— where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.

    ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭121:1-2‬

  • Chumba Deck Chumba

    14 SOJ redwoods grew a little taller and a little stronger in a hurricane of pain at NoToll this morning. The PAX enjoyed a gentle warm-up opener of ChumbaBurpee (Burpees completed for each “I get knocked down”) with SSH in between, then completed three delightful rounds of the F3 Beatdown Deck (x5 cards each round with a mosey around the field between), then returned to the Basketball court for a relaxing ChumbaMary finale (dealers choice for baseline reps and knockdown reps). It was in fact quite challenging and invigorating. Mumble chatter was light. Classic rock played for the F3 Deck rounds was solid. Always a pleasure gentlemen. YHC, DTH

    Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God. (1 Peter 4:1-2)

  • Salty Rain & Fancy Feet

    A swarthy half dozen gloom warriors took the Forge by storm, kicking off with DTH doing some kinda freaky rain dance that Juanita later came to regret…

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey down to the culdesac, stopping for x3 Groiners at each light pole en route
    • Circle up, Welcome, Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • Mosey to the handicap ramp, completing x3 Merkins at each light pole
    • Bear Crawl half way up ramp, Lunge walk the rest of the way
    • Partner up for Jerkins
    • x3 Sets of x10 each

    COP #2:

    • Tooth Fairies up the steps
    • Partner up for PLT’s
    • x3 Sets of x20 each

    COP #3:

    • Mosey up to the School Wall
    • x10 Hoedowns IC
    • x10 Hip Slappers IC
    • x10 Dirty Hookups IC (each side)

    COP #3:

    • Mosey around to the Soccer Field
    • Team up 3V3 for 10min of pick-up soccer
    • x3 burpees if you get scored on

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 6
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Below)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  Awesome time with the Forge fellas today, and with such cool weather! Enjoyed hearing all about Sundance having blue ribbons affixed to his banana hammock – but actually congrats, that’s a ton of work to win a body building competition! Was also entertaining to overhear during PLT’s Juanita ask “Is it raining?”, to which Last Call replied ”No, that’s ball sweat bro!” Yikes, hope you didn’t taste that salty rain. And we finished the morning with a quick game of pick-up soccer in the dawn light. Very kind of the HHS grounds crew to cut the grass – it’s only been about 3 months since the last trim! Notable soccer highlights were Posey megging Sundance for the first goal, Last Call doing a fancy behind the back kick, and YHC taking about 10 hits in a row to stop a Juanita goal from happening. It was fun and definitely got the heart rate up. Until next time, YHC, DTH

    Announcements:

    • 9/24 F3 Retreat – sign up for cornhole on the challenges spreadsheet

    Prayer Requests:

    • Doublemint, Fresh Prince, Heartburn, and plenty of other guys on IR
  • The one where Bulgarians chased Gremlins, Dingos became Dildos, and a Solo Rub resulted in a Titty Show

    Deep cuts from the R&B archives christened the morning, thumping base from the DJ’s big speakers set up on the basketball court, while nine SOJ HIM’s assembled. The Q was noted to plant the flag and then drive away, returning by foot. The PAX reluctantly mumbled something about coupons, but with crisp lower temps and a delicious breeze, spirits were not going to be easily shaken this morning. Here’s how DTH introduced the PAX to some new favorite exercises…

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Moseyrama around the parking lot, then mosey to the 2nd BBall court and circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • Line up for THE GREMLIN (A short distance Beast with bear crawls between stops)
    • x6 Reps at 25/50/75%, hit end and reverso 75/50/25% for a total of 6 stops (x36 Reps per Round, with a total of 6 Rounds)
    • Exercises included: 2-ct Lunges, Groiners, WWII’s, Monkey Humpers, Variation Merkins (Wide, Diamond, Carolina), & concluded with Heels to Heaven

    COP #2:

    • Mosey around to the big back lot to find DTH’s truck awaiting…
    • Collect bricks from truck
    • Circle up for DENSITY TRAINING
    • With the tunes a-rockin and a brick in each hand, the PAX completed x15 minutes of the following:
    • x10 Static Bulgarian Lunges ea side
    • x10 Clean & Press ea side 
    • x10 Renegade Rows ea side 
    • Run around the lot
    • Repeato until time called, return bricks

    COP #3:

    • Mosey to the little hill & steps area
    • Partner up for a DORA
    • x100 Merkins
    • x200 Dips
    • x300 Squats
    • Moving partner box jumps up steps, runs around and down other steps
    • OUT OF TIME DURING SQUATS

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 9
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Below)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  The depth of love between these brothers is clearly evident in the quality of their mumble chatter. Highlights of the morning seemed to surround Last Call, struggling to sweat out Friday night’s handle of bourbon, and questionably mistaking Dingo’s nickname for Dildo – this got the PAX in heaps of laughter, struggling to maintain exercise form, while he tried to explain himself. It was pointed out that you hear what you want to hear, or maybe that you interpret the world through the lens of your own experience. Either way, this got even better when an old dude on a bike rolled through the PAX and commented to Last Call that he liked watching him workout. There was a suggestion that Last Call might give the gentleman a nice little nip show the next time he lapped the lot, but LC declined. Turns out this is the kind of excellent humor is bound to happen at Rock&Roll which always starts with Morning Wood. Of course it was just Chaplain rubbing (I mean running) it out this morning. Overall, the PAX took the two new routines in stride, whether or not they were particularly liked, and YHC blessed them with a familiar little Dora to end the hour. With all that, YHC leaves you with a quote from Alexander Graham Bell to keep in mind:

    Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work in hand.

    The Sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus.

    Announcements:

    Prayer Requests:

    • Heartburn healing of jaw
    • Fresh Prince healing of leg
    • Doublemint knee healing
  • sWeatDog

    A solid crazy 8 HIM’s posted to WDog to let off some steam. The good Doctor was honored to serve the following sweatfest:

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey to the grass circle, and take a moseyrama lap, then circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom

    COP #1:

    • Mosey to the Carillon Field
    • FATBURNER LINDSEY (double the reps)
    • SSH’s 60-50-40-30-20
    • Mtn Climbers 20-30-40-50-60
    • Run between sides
    • Flutter Kicks for the Six

    COP #2:

    • Mosey to some soft grass half way to the Rusty Cage
    • HILLBILLY PLT’s (1 Rep for legs thrown center, left, right)
    • x3 Rounds, x10 Reps each

    COP #3:

    • Mosey to the rusty cage
    • SEVENS:
    • Pullups 6-1
    • Merkins 1-6

    COP #4:

    • Mosey to the Amphitheater bottom
    • EACAPE THE PIT with decreasing reps each step, 17–>1, alternating between Dips & LBC’s
    • Plankorama for the six – “HOOOOOLD IT!”

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 8
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Below)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer
    • COFFEERAMA by Hitchhiker

    NMS:  YHC has always loved the diversity of fitness options afforded at Dogwood Dell, so the PAX indulged YHC hitting a few fav’s. It was muggy but the mumble chatter was excellent, and we were very happy to welcome Bonanza to F3RVA. This young man was named some time ago posting in Roanoke and Va Beach, but is now settled east of Richmond (Varina), working as a firefighter. In spite of the intense pace set today, Bonanza had NO problem keeping up. Look forward to seeing him around! Many thanks to Hitchhiker serving a little Blanchards coffeerama following. You guys have a GREAT AO! Thank you for letting me Q. Yours, DTH

    Announcements:

    • New AO – The Crucible, 0730 Sat
    • Connect with TYA or Vinny for BRR
    • 9/24 – F3 Retreat – sign up here for cornhole teams 
    • Faceplant is coordinating his annual October Memorial Run so keep on the lookout for details

    Prayer Requests:

    • Brothers on IR, thinking of Doublemint, Fresh Prince, and others
    • Labrat & TYA healing
  • NewAss Glory!

    Six brave souls posted to the Forge for our second attempt at the quarterly New Glory. We were dripping with humidity before even getting started, but with the skull and shovel banners planted, the PAX went to work!

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Circle up at the Flag
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Review of the “New Glory” circuit, and complete a tour mosey around the circuit highlighting each of the 14 COP’s

    !!! NEW GLORY !!!

    • The Forge quarterly fitness litmus test, to provide PAX the opportunity to monitor their individual physical progress
    • Timeframe: 30 minutes
    • Style: BEST form possible, You vs YOU!
    • THE CIRCUIT:
    • Starting point at the Shovel Flag
    • #1:  Complete x10 Burpees at the flag
    • #2-5:  Run down S.Coleman Rd to the Handicap Ramp, stopping at each light pole (x4 poles total on the right side) to complete x5 Hand-release Merkins
    • #6:  Bear Crawl halfway up the Ramp
    • #7:  Lunge walk to the end gate
    • #8:  Complete x20 Jerkins on the Rails
    • Run up Mount Chaplain, stopping at each new paved landing to complete assigned exercise…
    • #9 (Level 1):  x5 Burpees
    • #10 (Level 2): x10 Ball Dippers (2-ct)
    • #11 (Level 3): x15 Heels-2-Heaven
    • #12 (Level 4): x20 Squats
    • #13 (Level 5:) x25 Mtn Climbers (2-ct)
    • #14:  At the top of Mt Chaplain, complete x30 WWII’s, then run BTTF to begin next Circuit 
    • THE GOAL: Complete as many circuit rounds as physically possible with good form until time is called. If you cheat or cut corners you are only hurting yourself and your baseline. If you take all 30 minutes to complete a single circuit, that will be the baseline you will work towards crushing next time.

    NEW GLORY completion points have been posted on the F3RVA Challenge Spreadsheet, where PAX can review progress over the years! Link HERE:  https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1-L8e9W24ygnU0suaGyKxzi1PgPqY1CBd57hLrKTZI-g/edit?usp=sharing

    TIME CALLED! 

    Mosey BTTF to Cool Down

    COT:

    • Counterama # 6
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Below)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  Sooooo, THAT doesn’t get any easier, especially with 9000% humidity. YHC was also missing the Hardywood rabbit to chase. Strong effort from all the PAX, and extra proud of Snuff for being the only other man to come back for seconds – excuses or silence abounded among those others who posted for the inaugural New Glory in April but who were conveniently indisposed today. Maybe we’ll see some of you guys come out for #3 in cool Autumn temps. Also gonna give a shout out to Splinter crossing the river – hope we didn’t discourage your soon return! And last but not least, it was noted that the name should be changed to “New ASS Glory” since there’s so much asphalt involved. Or maybe because it’s a guaranteed ass kicking. Hey, you gotta try hard or die tryin’ fellas. SYITG, DTH

    Announcements:

    • The Crucible – kicking off this Sat 0730 – see slack for details

    Prayer Requests:

    • Doublemint Knee Surgery today, and he’s requesting help moving stuff this weekend – pls DM him for details
  • Today’s Breakfast: HoneyDo sandwich with Pintobutter and Jelly

    A dozen HIM’s manned up to welcomed Pinto’s 2.0 FNG to Heartbreak for Ultimate Frisbee. Twas a wee bit gloomy, but by the time our warmerama lap was complete, there was enough light YHC didn’t need to use the glow sticks to mark end zones. We did however enjoy a light-up frisbee which helped a ton with visibility. Teams split up light and dark, with the bad guys stealing Snuff to have one more than YHC’s dark-colors team. YHC reviewed the rules and reminded the PAX of x3 Merkins per turnover for those guys involved, and x3 Burpees for the losers of each touchdown. 

    The game went smoothly, with YHC landing the first touchdown in fantastic snag/somersault style, and each team firing back touchdown for touchdown, keeping the score even until the last ten minutes. Tied up 6-6, the Light team put together a couple admirable touchdowns to win 8-6. 

    Most memorable highlights were a couple of YHC’s teammates sandwiching HoneyDo in the end zone TWICE to prevent his touchdown efforts. HoneyDo later took it all out on YHC with a palm to the face and a successful touchdown. YHC payed the pain forward with a clumsy slam on Snuff, who silently crumpled into a rib-hugging ball, and for which YHC served some apology burpees. Overall, YHC had a great time as always with the Heartbreak crew, and it’s been a long time since Roger Roger and Lumberg have made it out, so that made the morning extra special! And big welcome to JELLY! The PAX was asked what their favorite beans are (since it’s Pinto’s 2.0), and Jelly was the fan favorite. Always a pleasure, YHC, DTH

    COT:

    • Counterama # 13
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Below)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer
  • There Can Be Only JUAN!

    Eleven HIM’s converged at NoToll to play Ultimate Frisbee. Last Call looked like a well oiled Gumby sauntering over from a Solo Broga, dripping with confidence and namaste vibes. Juanita showed up with cleats and his own light up disc – which should have clued us all in. The following details the morning’s shenanigans, but it was clear – there can be only Juan! 

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey to the Field
    • Warm-up loop and place cones
    • Variable IC Warmup Reps
    • Teams randomized by counting off into Team 1 and Team 2, making it 5v6, with tiny JV pennies supplied by Juanita 
    • RULES: x3 Merkins for any player involved in a turnover, and x3 burpees for the losing team on each touchdown.

    GAME HIGHLIGHTS:

    It became immediately clear that Juanita was familiar with handling a disc, which was a good thing since the other team had Snuff who we all know is the dark horse of Ultimate (it would have been super bad if they were both on the same team). YHC ended up on the team of 6 and generously offered to have a man switch teams half way through to even things up… apparently, a slimmed down team of 5 PAX was the perfect number for the small field cause our early 2-2 score quickly took a turn for the worse as the five young guns ran a 6 touchdown streak, keeping YHC’s team exhausted with repeated burpees. Down 8-2, YHC verbally browbeat the lads into our own little streak with the final touchdown in Bone Thugs nimble fingers, valiantly losing 7-9 to the bad guys. 

    Noteworthy bad guys were Florence who will now be known as “The Hammer” for his unique and quite effective throwing style, Judge who is waaaayy faster than he lets on, Bullseye with his sneaky passing down the middle, and Last Call who will now be named “Mr Inertia” after body checking YHC (like a rag doll) off a catch and right out of bounds. It was not dissimilar to Orange Crush sending Snuff into a flat-spin, but to Snuff’s credit he held onto the disc for a touchdown. 

    Kudos to House Party for putting his height and fast hands to work, and it should also be recorded that while OC’s early efforts were generally disastrous, he made up for it with creating touchdown opportunities in our rally. A solid effort by all and a good number of merkins and burpees all around. Thanks for posting fellas. SYITG, DTH

    Mosey BTTF for COT:

    • Counterama # 11
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Below)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    Prayer Requests:

    • Healing for McGruff, Heartburn, and Labrat

    Announcements:

    • TODAY – SOJ Happy Hour at Triple Crossing
    • 7/21 – NavySeal Themed BoneThugs Q at The Forge (bring a squirt gun!)
    • 7/26 – Gumbo Q’s Home Run Derby
    • 7/26 – Pool Party HH at Snuff’s place
    • 7/28 – Dealer VQ at The Forge 
    • 7/29 – 3rd F at Starbucks (Broad&288)
    • 7/30 – Boberry Q’s School of Rock
    • 8/2 – Ultimate at Heartbreak Ridge
    • 8/4 – New Glory at The Forge
    • 8/8 – Daville Takeover all AO’s
    • 8/9 – 2nd F Lunch at Innsbrook
  • Pouring Perspiration, Parched for Precipitation 

    Departing the deluge of Bon Air and other points North, a strong PAX of 9 HIM’s gathering in the stifling humidity of Rock&Roll without a drop of refreshing rain in sight. No problem, we’ll bring our own sweaty rainfall to the AO. 

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey loop around the lot & circle up on the basketball court
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom (heaps of 8-counts)

    COP #1:

    • Ind.People’s Run to the Tennis Courts
    • LINDSEY:
    • Donkey Kicks 10-15-20-25-30
    • Chain Smokers 30-25-20-15-10
    • Run across x3 courts between sets

    COP #2:

    • Mosey via GRABASS back around the park loop – Q calls a PAX name, he takes off like a bat out of hell, first PAX to catch him calls x20 reps of their choosing. The Catch – front runners mosey back to the Six to perform the reps. 

    COP #3:

    • Mosey to the Picnic Pavilion for BODOS’ TABLE MADNESS:
    • #1: WINGNUTS – Sitting on picnic table, feet under bench, lean back to approx. 15 degrees with back and neck straight, fists touching in front of chest so that elbows point parallel with shoulders, rotate waist so that each elbow touches the table top. 4-Count IC, x10 completed. 
    • #2: COYOTE UGLY’S – Partner Up – Starting in a wheel barrow position with partner, P1 starts on the ground and steps up to picnic table ‘seat’ with his hands, completes 1 Merkin, steps up to top of the table top , 1 Merkin, steps back down to the ‘seat’, 1 Merkin, steps back down to the ground, 1 Merkin. That’s one rep. Each Partner completes x5 reps.
    • #3: HAIL MARY’S – P1 elbow planks on ground, P2 places his legs on P1’s back and performs 20 dips with his hands on table bench. Each partner completes x3 sets of 20.
    • #4: WINGNUTS for another x10 IC

    COP #4:

    • MOSEYRAMA around park loop to the grassy hill
    • TRIPLE CHECK: 
    • P1 – Nancy Kerrigans (1-leg SSH)
    • P2 – Mtn Climbers
    • P3 – Convert from Mtn Climbers to Bear Crawl up the grassy hill, run down stairs to switch

    COP #4:

    • Mosey back to the large middle lot
    • Circle up for PLANK COMPASS – each PAX’ feet remain fixed in place, while hands plank walk X degrees in whichever direction Q calls, with x5 merkins between each new direction

    Mosey BTTF:

    • En Route, Lunge Walk x50 yards

    COT:

    • Counterama # 9
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • MICKEY took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  Well, YHC lost about 5 pounds in sweat, and you know it’s a good one when Six-Pack Jack is about ready to spill merlot towards the end. Granted, Mickey also puts in 110% for the entire 60min, which if any of the PAX attempted a bootcamp at his level, they’d be spilling within the first ten min – respect to you good sir! YHC was really looking forward to a beatdown in the pouring rain, but seems the rain was bent on staying north of Midlothian. Appreciated seeing Doublemint’s twins making a reentry to F3 after their recent first beatdown at Batteau. And if you have not yet seen Florence with a mustache, it is GLORIOUS! I swear he wears it better than most I’ve ever seen. Love pushing past the limit with you guys! SYITG, DTH

  • Punching the Penguin

    A handsome set of Forge regulars showed up for superhero training. It was humid, and exhausting, and a perfect way to choke out the Jester of excuses and sloth.

    The THANG:

    WARMERAMA:

    • Mosey to the flagpoles and circle up
    • Welcome & Disclaimer
    • Variable IC Reps to get the muscles warm top to bottom
    • Mosey down to the lower lot

    Batman Workout: 

    • 10 sets is the goal
    • Each set:  x20 squats, x40 Punches, x10 Ball Dippers (2-ct), x10 Merkins, x20 Shoulder Taps, x20 Mtn Climbers (2-ct), x10 WWII Punches, x10 Straight Leg Raises, x10 Am.Hammers (2-ct)
    • After each set, run the parking lot loop

    Mosey BTTF:

    • En route hold Al Gore for Doozy putting the headlock on a local sad clown walker
    • Bernie up the hill BTTF

    COT:

    • Counterama # 8
    • Namerama
    • Announcerama (see Comments)
    • YHC took the PAX out in Prayer

    NMS:  So apparently great minds think alike, considering Florence did a version of this Batman Workout at R&R last Saturday while YHC was out of town. House Party was the only one who had the “pleasure” of double dipping, and informed me after that they’d done the x10 sets of each exercise in succession rather than in circuit. Either way, The Batman workout is a absolute smokefest. TClaps to Fresh Prince who finished all x10 Rounds and did an extra round while we ran down the clock. YHC completed 8, and pretty sure Doozy quite nearly got to 10. YHC closed out our COT with a testimony and encouragement to reconsider to quality and quantity of that which we consume, which the QSource specifically refers to as The Queen. It doesn’t matter how much we workout if we are loading our systems with junk. Choose something to give up for a day or a week, and use the ensuing hunger you feel for that normal indulgence to pray/meditate or consume something healthier. Accountability matters, so tell a brother what your doing. Love, DTH