Author: Upchuck

  • La Plage du Exercise

    Three animaux dangereux launched at The Clinic in the wee hours of the mountain morning, lakeside. Conditions were sunny and 70. According to the fisherman ALREADY out at water’s edge, the following might have happened:

    Mosey from 201 Rue Noblemaire to La Plage de Talloires. Circle up. Explain F3 to the FNG.

    COP:

    SSHs x50.
    Dead Man Hang, moving into a little Broga.
    Hand Release Merkins x15.
    WWIIs x10.
    Flutter Kicks x20 (4 count).
    Imperial Walkers x10.
    Hillbillies x10.

    Mosey to the Water’s Edge for Touch a Tree. Said exercise was explained. One time. No questions. Perfectly executed*.

    Round of 4: HRMs, Flutter Kicks.
    Round of 6: WWIIs, Monkey humpers
    Round of 8: Carolina Dry Docks, Jack Webb

    * Jackie touched every 3rd tree. YHC assumes the distances between trees were not sufficient, so touching every 3rd tree extended each round. Push yourself, don’t hurt yourself.

    Mosey to the dock. Line up for curb crawls. 1 merkin after the first round, then 2, and so forth up to 5, then back down to 1.

    Mosey to the small grass field for Elevens. Merkins and WWIIs.

    COT: Numbers, names, and YHC took us out.

    Close out with a jump in the lake to cool off.

    NMS: Spider Runners will remember Jackie who joined us during an UpChuck Q up and down the UR hills some time ago. She’s a stud, to say the least (Wisconsin state champ and headed to run D3 cross-country at Smith College in the fall). She convinced her twin brother, Bobby, to join us. Bobby played high school football for one of the worst programs in the country (0-40 something?) as a kicker (not much work to be done). He’s a committed political activist with a decidedly left wing lean. The PAX considered “Milton Friedman” before ultimately settling on Super Duper Mansplaining, suggested by Jackie, and hereafter authorized to be abbreviated to Mansplaining. Like a man, he owned it. Good dude.

    Welcome to our FNG, Mansplaining.

    ** Note that the DNQ refers to “Does Not Qualify” as YHC has done his one Down Range post on this vacation.

  • A Titanic Run

    One intrepid traveler launched from the banks of the River Lagan in the latest edition of The Clinic. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to crew of the HMS Tyne, the following may have happened:

    Depart Donegal Quay, heading north / east along the River Lagan. Weave among the office buildings and former slips to the trucking terminal. Expressed condolences to Frank Sobotka.

    Reverse direction moving one street west weaving eventually back to the banks of the Lagan to the foot bridge. Cross the Lagan and turn left / east, passing the HMS Tyne. A fine Belfast morning to the skeleton crew on deck. Proceeding north / east until arrival at the Titanic Museum, proceeding through the slip where Titanic was built and launched. Continue along the Lagan to the HMS Caroline until fencing ended the available territory. Reverse and head back to the launch point, continuing an extra .15 miles and back to make the full loop a flat 5.0 miles.

    Number, name, and YHC took himself out.

    Announcements (a mixture of up-coming events of YHC’s choosing):

    Westhoe Meeting. Sometime this week. Already happened. Couldn’t make it.

    Convergence July 4. Can’t make it.

    YHC Qing Hoedown and Spider Run Q’s for July 15/16. Took name off Q sheet. Can’t make it. Sorry, Kubota, YHC is not the man you are.

    July 17 Woodsman VQ, The Crossing. Can’t make it.

    July 18 Meatball, Vinny’s Baseball (aka, Wiffleball). Can’t make it.

    July 27, The Bridge. 07:30 a.m. This is a Beat Down in Buckingham. Join me in helping some men transitioning from detention to a free life. Provide a role model. Leave no man where you found him.

    NMS:

    Belfast is not hot. Belfast is not humid. 50, clouds, and 20 MPH wind. But, sea level here remains flat along the docks. The BRR, this was not. This solid training run on a seasonally modest morning provided a nice tour of the Belfast waterfront.

    It was interesting to run through the dock / slipway (the actual space!) where Titanic was built. Far smaller than YHC expected, or perhaps YHC is faster than YHC expected.

  • The Return of Vinny’s Poison Ivy?

    Eight pathfinders jumped into the Gloom in the latest edition of The Dogpile. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the couples admiring our form on the Vita Trail, the following might have happened:

    Mosey towards the normal circle, then veer 90 degrees to the small field in front of the green / muraled storage unit for the COP.

    Little baby crunches (to start!) x20
    Flutter kicks
    WWIIs
    Hand release / Da’Shawn Watson Merkins (no hands!)
    SSHs

    Let’s mosey to the small triangle where the road into the park meets the small parking lot next to the Grand Field. Not a place we usually use. Partner up for Touch-a-Tree.

    Rounds of 4, 6, and 8 trees. Ab exercise while the runner runs.

    Mosey to the Street of Despair. 5 merkins at every lamp post. Unless you want to do them on the sidewalk, in which case 6 merkins. On the grass, 20 merkins per pole. Circle up at the former Police Statue circle. Find a different partner for an oldie, but goodie.

    Partner 1, WWIIs.
    Partner 2, climb the hill adjacent to the water storage pond (under construction).

    The grass was cut, and therefore only 3-5 inches deep, much deeper than it looks. PAX will keep us informed on whether Vinny’s Poison Ivy makes an appearance.

    Mosey to the VITA Trail.

    Bro-code run, stopping at each exercise apparatus. Actual equipment only. Birdhouses and just-a-sign do not count. 3 finger-tip or diamond merkins plus 3 WWIIs at each stop.

    Halfway through, the PAX found some shade and an audience for fire-hydrants (look it up). Much fun was had by all.

    Continue the circuit, but switch to 3 Chuck Norris merkins and 3 V-ups.

    Trot across Park Avenue to the four yellow boulders along the entrance driveway. The PAX moseys past these regularly, but rarely uses them. Today, we did. Partner up (with a new partner):

    Partner 1: Mosey to the tree / port-o-potty.
    Partner 2: Alternating rounds of either 10 incline merkins or 10 decline merkins plus a Dealer’s Choice ab exercise until Partner 1 returns. PAX felt like this was 10 rounds. Close.

    Mosey BTTVSF. 50 burpees called, but time, so sadly, no burpees.

    Numbers, names, and Oyster took us out.

    Announcements:

    Hopefully, a successful launch at The Iron Bridge today. Looking forward to hearing how that went.

    Monday, The Alamo, 5:30 a.m., our Brother Wildcat will run us ragged in advance of his next doctor’s appointment. Be there for the man.

    Summer Tour continues. Let’s do it.

    July 4, Convergence, Batteau (meet at the Stone House), 7:00 a.m. City Proper hosting?

    August 21, First Watch, join me in celebrating my father’s 100th birthday. River Road Church, Baptist. 05:00.

    Late September, F3RVA’s 10th Anniversary workout. Convergence. Dogpile. Please reach out to Gomer or Rosie. We need guys to contribute their time and energy for this effort. Lots of options for helping. Turn off your phone, put your clipboard to the side, and lend a hand. Let’s go!

    NMS: YHC arrived to an unexpected sight – a lone Kia abandoned at Dogpile by a grey-bearded 45/6ish year old gone for a pre-run. Nice work, Rosie.

    James River Heating / Cooling showed up, and promptly did nothing to make the temperatures more pleasant.

    The US Army showed up to explain how 2 really equals 4. Go figure. But, always nice to have an actual shovel flag, so boom. Board shorts, flip-flops, and a shovel flag. Nice start.

    Honeymoon brought another Kia, so now we have two.

    Nancy brought a beast of a car. Vrrrooom, vrrooom.

    Oyster arrived thinking YHC had tossed him the Q, and Hitchhiker quietly rounded out the PAX after dropping off his mother in law at the tanning salon.

    Prayer Request: Hitch is becoming a parent again (x3!) sometime this week. MIL in town for 3 weeks. 3 weeks. THREE weeks. Prayers for peace, patience, love, kindness, etc.

    Prayers for Wildcat, his family, and every PAX member who attempts to keep up with him on Monday. LFG!

  • Your Mom is How Much Younger Than Your Dad?

    6 quarter horses trotted up to the paddock for the latest edition of Currahee. Conditions remained constant at 70 and sunny. According to the guy shooting hoops at Godwin, the following might have happened.

    Route(s):

    Part A: Right on Pump. Left immediately onto Old Prescott. Run to the end of the Cul-de-Sac and back to the VSF.

    Part B: Run to the trail at the back middle of Godwin HS (up the steps). Exit onto Maremont. Immediate left onto Willowick. Right on Avenham. Right on Raintree. Left on Maremont (which loops around to Raintree). Right on Raintree. Left on Maremont back to the VSF.

    4 milers: Do Part A 1x and do Part B 2x

    5 milers: Do both Parts A and B 2x.

    6 milers: Do Part A 3x and do Part B 2x.

    Run in any order you choose. The PAX chose to stay together, except for Pigskin who was sighted on the Maremont loop lugging kettlebells.

    Numbers, names, and YHC took us out.

    Announcements:

    Tomorrow, lots of options. First and foremost, there is a new AO launching. The Iron Bridge. Goyne Park. Chester, VA. See Slack for time. State Farm has the Q. Be prepared to bring it.

    If you don’t fancy hanging with cool dudes at The Iron Bridge, you can always hang with Gypsy and the Expendables / Disposables / Despicables at The Gridiron, Redwood Original, F3RVA’s first (and therefore oldest, pun intended) AO. Wear your vest, and show your bottom rocker. Jax Teller has the Q.

    Or, trot yourself over to Les Dogpile at 06:00 where ole’ UpChuck will lead a set of slow stretching exercises for the hour. Rumors that the PAX will migrate to The Early Bird Biscuit Company at 06:30 are not true. They don’t open until 7.

    Monday, Davey Crockett himself has the Q at The Alamo. Come celebrate Wildcat’s birthday. Be there. Bring your Summer Tour passport. Special room rates at the Residence Inn Rountree.

    July 4th. Convergence. Forest Hill Park. Pickleball paddle not required, just a good set of gloves and preparedness for a sweat fest.

    August 21. First Watch. Come celebrate YHC’s father’s 100th birthday. Should be a hoot. 05:00.

    YHC believes there is a kid’s workout at DaPile this weekend as well, but double check with those fellas.

    NMS: Good chatter this morning across the 5 runners. Man, those are some good dudes. Special thanks to Mr. Rogers who clearly has a gift for listening. It will surprise no one that YHC did 90% of the talking, and Mr. Roger’s did 100% of the teaching. Super thankful for this line, “When do I get to be first?” (If you just thought, “yeah, what about me?” then you have missed the point.) Do things for other people. It’s not about you.

    July Challenge: what are you going to give up? YHC suggests…embellishing, bs’ing, changing things to fit yourself. This group is about being humble enough to ask for help, give help, and build through mutual help. If someone takes the time to give you help, chances are you should take it. If someone thinks, “Man, I don’t really need help,” that might be a good time to consider whether your colleagues would agree.

    BRR….still time to sign up for one of the biggest challenges F3RVA has to offer. Spend 2 days with your pals. Make friendships. Conquer many, many mountains. Grow yourself. Contact TYA for details. When he does not respond to your texts, ask for help.

    BTW, YHC is usually the winner with the answer to the Back Blast title at 15 years. But, not with this crowd. Two dads of these hombres clock in at 19 years older than Momma.

    UpChuck spits the bit.

  • Thanks for Coming Out

    Twelve oarsmen launched from the Huguenot Shipyard for the 5th Annual, 1st Inaugural First Watch Deliverance workout. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the toothless City Proper/SOJ combo hillbillies eyeing us, the following might have happened.

    04:30 Secure the AO. Kubota (aka, Q-bota on site).

    04:35 YHC on scene.

    04:40 Lockjaw

    04:50 First Water.

    Progressively crowded dockyard, and some stragglers asking themselves,”What time does the 05:00 paddle start?”

    Posey (paddle-mosey) over to the North Bank. Circle up.

    Warm-a-rama

    Dead Man Hang
    Helicopters
    Don Quixote
    Copperhead Squats
    ‘Mercans
    LBCs
    Flutter Kicks
    Inverted Scorpion Kicks
    Scorpion Kicks

    Triple Check.
    Partner 1: Bear crawl to that thing out there that Kubota pointed at in the darkness. No. That thing. Nope – the other thing. Yep, that one, nope, that other one. OK, got it.
    Partner 2: punching bag
    Partner 3: Wilson’s Dying Cucarachas

    Back in the boats.

    Etes -vous prets? Partez!!! Sprintervals d’eau. Intermittent hard paddling, followed by light paddle. 6 rounds.

    Somewhere along the line, Bacon Bits’ boat is swamped in the gale. Takes on water. Persists. Adapts. Overcomes.

    Paddle upstream to the American Flag. Moment of quiet contemplation. Pictures. Fanfare. Celebration.

    Slow paddle enjoying the sunrise. Back to the VSF, passing two actual shovel flags. And, scene.

    Announcements:

    Summer Tour continues.

    Wildcat. Monday. El Alamo. Be there for the man. Life may be you against you, but it’s easier and better when we are there for each other.

    Breaking Bread for June. Someone had to drop out for the last weekend in June. Who can step in and help out? (Remember: There is no Hot Potato for Breaking Bread – if you need to drop, pass the word and find a replacement).

    July 4: Convergence at Forest Hill Park.

    August 21: 100th Birthday Celebration. Come join us. First Watch. 05:00. Stamp your Tour Card.

    NMS: No better way to start a day. Paddling by headlamp. Quick workout. Amazing sunrise. Coffeteeria. Plus, a cameo appearance from BT over coffee.

    Thanks for coming out, fellas. Never gets old.

  • Yo-Yo Route

    12 runners/walkers and a 5 bikers strung themselves together in the latest edition of THE Run at Mary Mumford (RAMM). Air, land, and sea conditions held constant at 70 and sunny. According to the pack of tomatoes running on Grooooove, the following might have happened:

    Parking lot south on Commonwealth to the gravel track / dirt track / quarter mile loop / whatever any PAX member calls it. Run 1/2 of the loop to Westhampton. North on Westhampton to Grove.

    Left on Grove. Left on Lexington. Choose your own adventure going either left (Lexington) or right (Albemarle) and complete the loop back to Grove. Right on Grove. Right on Westhampton. 

    Left onto the gravel track / dirt track / quarter mile loop / whatever any PAX member calls it. Return to Westhampton and repeat the above loops back / forth for the 45 minutes. 

    Finish at 6:15 at the parking lot. 

    Numbers, names, (cyclists return), more names, and Marv was gracious in taking us out.

    Announcements: 

    Summer Tour. Get out there. Meet some new guys. See some new places. Learn to navigate Hutton’s spreadsheet. 

    Prayer requests: 

    We have at least two guys whose loved ones are fighting tough battles with challenging diseases. It can be easy to rattle off names, but let’s think hard about how we can help our friends and their families. Fudd’s sister is going through a second battle with breast cancer. Splinter’s mom has just 2 weeks ago been diagnosed with leukemia. Leadership is about helping other people. For those who remember Inky Johnson, “It’s not about you.” Let’s get after it and support our pals.

    NMS: 

    Yo-Yo Route today. T-claps to Wedding Singer and Hitch for remembering the greeting. 

    Good chat after the run with some guys about appreciating what we have and learning that a lot of modest things can be overcome and make us stronger.

    Upchuck spits the bit.

  • I’m the Q, but I Don’t Know the Streets

    A dirty dozen (12!!) men of The North (ok, 10 of The North and 2 Travelers) stood forth at the latest edition of the Raider Run. Conditions remained a steady 70 and sunny. According to the state trooper on overwatch, the following might have happened:

    5s – BroCode Style. Run the Atlee HS/MS/ES Metroplex loop. Then, left onto Atlee, cross the railroad bridge, left onto Combs, Oakham, Colvincrest, Hughesland, Crestfield, Combs, Atlee, and BTTVSF.

    Ruckers. Go out. Ruck. Return. Several wearing 50 pounds. Nice. T-claps to the “extra 50 and over 50” group (50 extra pounds and over 50 years old). Studs.

    Numbers, names, and Opus took us out with a reminder about looking out for others, especially on mental health issues.

    Announcements:

    June 6 – 80th Anniversary of D-Day Ruck. 7:00 p.m. Starts at Palani Drive (Restaurant) on Libbie. 9 miles, or roughly the distance from Utah Beach to St. Mere-Eglise.

    On the topic of WWII and Normandy, we’ll have a 100th birthday celebration workout for my father on August 21. First Watch. 5:00 a.m.

    June 22 – 2.0 workout at Atlee. 7:00 a.m. start.

    Also, June 22 – New AO starting at Groin Park (ok, Goyne Park) in Chester. See State Farm or Posh for start time.

    History Footnote: June 22 also is the day Germany invaded the Soviet Union in 1941.

    Summer Tour continues. Plan your travels. And, do not hesitate to pass around some good rumors about EF Hutton’s scoring system. There were a few solid old wives tales shared this morning.

    Prayer Request: let’s keep our pal Fudd, his sister, and his whole family in our prayers. Her breast cancer has returned, this time on her spine. She and the family all have a tough road ahead, and we should be there supporting them every step.

    NMS: Super good to return to Atlee and The North (apologies to Canada) today. Nice to catch up with Hash and hear how his college and career activities have played out for the past few years. Also good to chat with Phonics and Anchovy. Nice to meet Trail Mix, current title holder of F3RVA’s Deepest Baritone, and nice to see so many F3 veterans. There was chatter about pulling AO’s together on the occasional Saturday so guys can catch up. This is worth a discussion. Might be fun.

    FWIW, SIX state troopers having an intense meeting by the soda machine at the Wawa on Atlee Station after the workout. YHC assumes they were investigating reports of a Smoke Fest on Combs.

    UpChuck spits the bit.

  • It’s Just So Juicy

    Eight came to whack the ball around in the latest edition of The Batteau, Summer Pickleball Edition. Temperatures were, once again, 70 and sunny. According to ESPN’s SportsCenter coverage, the following might have happened:

    COP. Mosey around the courts, watching for the occasional court drying equipment or ball barrier. Work in a few reps of shuffling side-to-side or Bernie Sanders to get the muscles loose.

    SSHs, Dead Man Hang, and a little bit of broga. Onto the Main Event.

    Doubles. Fun was had. Wind was a factor. Rain held off.

    Nice work, gentlemen. Great games today.

    Numbers, names, and YHC took us out.

    NMS: Whitesnake is susceptible to conversation during a match. Topics included the difference between les Blues and les Spurs.

    Announcements:

    TODAY: D-Day Anniversary Celebration Ruck (June 3). “Omaha” Meet at Palani Drive. 401 Libbie Avenue (across from Libbie Market). 5:45 launch. 5.6 mile route (aka, distance from Omaha Beach to Pointe du Hoc (look it up). Something to do with Rangers. Happy hour to follow.

    Thursday (Actual 80th Anniversary): Utah. 7:00 p.m. 9.3 miles, roughly Utah Beach to St. Mere Eglise. Meet at Palani Drive.

    June 22nd. (Skip the WWII Barbarossa reference). Goyne Park, Chester. Fully charge the battery on your EV and put in the extra distance to visit a new AO (and support your brothers with the launch!). See State Farm or Posh for details.

    Don’t sleep on the Summer Tour. Get out there and hit some new locations.

    And, don’t sleep on The Bridge. These guys need our help as they work back into society, learn some skills, and get themselves back on their feet. Get out there and help someone. See TYA for which weekends F3RVA has the Q.

    Find a challenge. Find a hard challenge. Take it on, and make an impact.

    UpChuck spits the bit.

  • The Prodigal Son

    5, later 6, assembled in the full daylight that is Sunday Funday. Conditions were 70 and sunny. According to the 30-and-under crowd struggling to communicate verbally, the following might have happened:

    Route: Bridge, Buttermilk, Belle Isle loop, bridge, North Bank. Just over 7 miles. Nice work, fellas.

    Back at the parking lot, Ollivander joined us. Nice to catch up.

    Names, numbers, YHC took us out.

    Announcements:

    Blue Ridge Relay. Team has about 10-11 guys so far. Reach out to TYA to join. Leave September 5. Run is September 6-7. Homecoming is September 8. This is a 210 mile relay. Candidly, it’s not for everyone, but we have been doing this for about a decade. If you are interested in learning to put “push yourself; don’t hurt yourself” into action, please consider joining us.

    Grow Ruck. Already happened. Twice. See Faceplant for a summary.

    ReeseStrong 5k. “The Hard Way.” Already happened. More than twice.

    Something new in a place called, “Chester” starts in June. Something similar, but not the same, that is also new (or maybe a resurrection of something else?) has started in a place called, ”Amelia.” No Bachelor’s Degree in Outdoor Recreation or Supply Chain Management for Exercise Shoes required. Just show up.

    Summer Tour. On-going, again, but different. Run the numbers and make a plan. Learn where Chester is. Amelia is a different thing.

    Offshore is hosting some kind of corporate 5k on Thursday, June 6, designed to show who the fastest person is in his office. Invite your work colleagues, smoke them, and earn the right to remind them ad nauseum that they lost for the next year. Jerks. Also, remember to mention winning this in your annual performance appraisal under “Strengths.”

    NMS: It’s summer. So, watch for wayward traffic cameras / speed zones that are set for school day speed limits. See Faceplant for details or to test drive a Rivian.

    If you know what the ReeseStrong 5k is and you did it The Hard Way, you are Old School. T-Claps.

  • And Then There Were Seven

    Seven men of principle came forth on a glorious morning. Temperatures were 70 and sunny. According to the lady in the orange Miata, the following quite possibly happened.

    Mosey west in the parking lot, head fake Senor Frog to the left, then go right and across the street to the River Road Church, Baptist.

    COP

    SSHs (4 count) x50
    Dead man hang and various other stretches
    Monkey humpers
    Hand release merkins
    Imperial Walkers
    Flutters kicks

    Mosey to the edge of River Road for Touch a Tree. 1, then 2, then 3. Partner does WWIIs.

    Mosey to the left side of the church. Form one, single-file line. Bear crawl along an assorted set of walkways. Arrive at center of church portico. Three pencil rolls to the right. Continue the bear crawl through various walkways to the portico of whatever that thing is that is not the church.

    Mosey to Senor Kubota’s truck and grab a block.

    Mosey to the guard rail in the parking lot. Circuit is 10 4-count derkins, 10 4-count presses with block, and flutter kicks.

    Carry the block across the street to the county’s smallest park. Partner up. Partner 1 does murder bunnies. Partner 2 chooses whether to run the park loop without the block or run to the street sign while carrying the block.

    Mosey back to the VSF.

    Touch a Tree. Rounds of 4, 5 and 6. Options: carry the block and touch any trees. Or, do not carry the block and the usual Harvard Business School approved Touch a Tree rules apply.

    3 burpees to wrap it up.

    Numbers, names, and YHC took us out.

    Announcements:

    None.

    Prayer Requests: our pal Splinter’s mom and his family are going through a new illness. Let’s keep her and all of them in our prayers.

    NMS: Nice energy level today, fellas. Awesome morning to be out there with you. Way to push!