Author: Snuff

  • It’s not Cadence, it’s Contemplation

    13 seekers heeded the call. Playlist, check. Sunrise, check. Cool summer breeze and a guided meditation, also check.

    Warmarama on the hill, Bernie up and do some reps (downhill facing mirkins, downhill facing LBCs, downhill facing plank jacks), mosey down then Bernie back up to make sure we saw the colors on the horizon.

    Mosey to the circle for a triple check Coachella style with some Slayyyyter blasting. Jump squats, WW2s and timer on the loop.

    Around the bend for a Pigskin special, wall sits with Muhammad Alis, Balls to the Wall, donkey kicks, repeato x3 with dirty hookups on the back end. Last Call “did not sign up for this.” True, but we were born into this life and must walk the path of destiny laid out for us. Even if it involves Australian mountain climbers.

    To the amphitheater for some box jumps.

    Then – 15 minutes of guided meditation by Ram Dass. Cool breeze on our skin, sun in our eyes, birds in the sky, nothing but breath and breath alone.

    Mosey back to the flag for COT.

    It is certainly an age of distraction in the current day’s attention economy. The hardest it has ever been to focus, to listen to something real, to find the breath and find peace. The ultimate challenge. And for just a few minutes this morning we were locked in, bro code with the breath. It was a beautiful thing, thank you for being there and for just being.

  • Pope Punk

    This is the most challenging time in any man’s life: supporting his children + his aging parents, under the pressure to provide, childhood dreams ground to dust, waterboarded by a firehose of slop, watching the seas flow out towards the looming tsunami of AI disruption. It’s gotten so bad that even the Vatican has to release a statement claiming that the machines can’t think. Wrong. They can, but there is one AI can’t do: feel the suck.

    Mosey to the wet fields (toll paid) where we lay down in wet grasses for LBCs and hand release mirkins and other warmarama. In order to feel something, anything.

    Dora with some exercises. 21st century digital boy – is this song about me? The music was loud and punk is not dead. Mosey to the fence for some skatepark wall rides. Army crawl through 3 inches of water in the ditch. Feeling disgusting and miserable. One angry song’s worth of burpees. Another Dora.

    “I’m hardly feeling human anymore. Enough to drag my body from the floor.”

    Mosey back to the courts (toll paid) for some ab Mary. Wet, beat down, but human in the most alive way. Extremely human – now that is punk rock. Hypernormalisation can eat shit.

    “A handful of redemption’s all we need.”

    COT. Can a machine pray?

  • Lugnut Mangasm

    6 ding dongs brought their bells out from underneath their pillows for a brand new pavement-pounding playlist.

    Warmarama.

    Triple check 1: Timer carries 2 cinder blocks up the hill. Skull crushers + kettle bell swings.

    Triple check 2: Timer carries 2 cinder blocks up the hill. Pulls + squat thrusters.

    Triple check 3: Timer bell crawls up the hill with 2 bells. Block chest press + block curls.

    Triple check 4: Timer Bernies up the hill with a bell. WW2s with a bell + squats.

    Triple check 5: Timer lunge walks with the block across the lot and back. Mirkins dragging the bell + Turkish getups. (unfinished).

    COT.

    Coffee in the breeze while listening to piano bar music. Everyone pitched in to help Blank Space change his tire. Perfect spring morning.

  • Fellowship of the Spring

    20 strong at the Forge. Perfect weather for a playlist with lots of lyrics.

    Mosey around the way and down to the low lot for a warmarama. SSHs, DQs, Freddie Mercurys, LBCs, mirkins, etc etc.

    Mosey to the lowest lot for a 4 corners. 10 burpees, wait, 15 since Last Call didn’t hear the first time, 30 squats, 45 mountain climbers, 60 of something else.

    Triple check at the base of the stairs: timer hops up then runs around while partners do step ups and Lieutenant Dans. We were going to do squats or lunges, why not both?

    Base of Mt Chaplin for a quarter pounder on the big section. 25 decline mirkins, 50 LBCs, 75 calf raises, 100 flutter kicks.

    Mosey around to the amphitheater for some box jumps with ascending squats, then ascending descending dips.

    The Cure was on the radio so we naturally did a tunnel of love with the PAX doing mirkins while everyone bear crawled through.

    Mosey back to the flag for some sunrise appreciation and COT.

    Great fellowship, lots of laughs, good way to ring in the morning. Welcome Metroid!

  • Cliffhanger

    Horngrabler by Alphorn-Grossformation on the radio. Because nothing resonates across the mountainous region of NoToll like traditional Swiss wind instruments. The fields are alive with the sounds of grunting.

    7 alpinists enjoyed a Warmarama while musing ‘it’s not not a cult.’ Because the last 2 Tuesdays in a row, anyone walking through Huguenot Park at 5:30a would be very confused.

    Mosey around all the fields and returning for our Cindys. Because Last Call loves a good Cindy, you could hear it in his voice. “What the heck?” It was time for some playground beatdown.

    Partner 1 with block step ups on the bench while timer ran the playground loop. At least 4 or 5 times each.

    Triple check: timer runs the loop while 2nd man hangs from the bars, 3rd man does block curls. DK managed to insult the playlist because it was ‘very mainstream.’ Dagger through the heart.

    At the mountain of madness: 11s, 10 mountain climbers at the base, bear crawl up the play hill, calf raises at the top. Every dead body on Everest was once a very motivated person. Then we held canoe with feet hanging out into thin air.

    Some block thrusters and squats in the parking lot and it was time.

    And yes, L Woods, there was a shovel flag. Gotchu.

    COT – prayers for Tin Man and for health and for strength.

    And before we all left – a bonus track – DK’s 2.0 with some epic metal screaming on YouTube. The kids are alright.

  • Light it up like its dynamite

    1 pulse pounding playlist, 12 men at the club til dawn.

    Warmarama: 7.5 minutes of dancing to this song:

    Mosey across the fields; ground pounding 11s with donkey kicks on the fence, bear crawl 5 yards and mirkins, on repeat.

    Mosey around the field and back to the pavilion for a Dynamite triple check: raise the roof, twerk squats, timer runs to the center of the field.

    3.5 minutes of dancing.

    Monkey jumpers, Alabama prom dates, Rosalitas, pickle pounders to everyone’s favorite Lonely Island song. Cash or credit.

    Circle up for some Charlie XCX, burpee every time she sings ‘I Love It.’

    Scrunchy frogs to the tune of Crazy Frog. Trojan remarked that this song may have more cultural relevance than anything Bob Dylan released. Debatable, but no one can doubt the sheer brilliance of the Crazy Frog.

    Attempted some mankillers but to be honest they weren’t hitting the beat so we just danced instead.

    Mosey to the lot: 11s to the tune of Rihanna: polesmokers, crab walk to the curb, crab cakes. All to the beat: we found love in a hopeless place.

    Mosey back to the flag for one more minute of dancing: “One day you’ll leave this world behind so live a life you will remember.”

    COT and gratitude for the great dance.

  • Boom clap

    7 men, 7 bells. Incessant ringing.

    Mosey to the roundabout for a warmarama. SSHs, DQs, helicopters, mirkins, plank jacks, LBCs, Rosalita whips, etc.

    Mosey to the double stair case for a some overhead press per stair, descending squats per stair. Jump squats up the stairs, squat down the stairs.

    Some wall work, hoedowns with the kettle bells. Then balls to the wall Bombs over Baghdad. Sprint to the other end of the soccer field.

    Chest presses oyo followed by WW3s: feet up the hill, inverted WW2s with a kettle bell. Boom clap with 40 squat thrusters.

    Since we’re suckers for pain, sprint back to clockwork hill for some lunge walks up. Muhammad Alis with the bell against the wall. Lunge down. 40 American Hammers. Walk back up the hill. Bernie down.

    Mosey to the loop for some kettle bell swings. Mosey up to the main roundabout for some more kettlebell swings. Like a bullet with butterfly wings.

    Mosey back to the flag for some parking lot bear crawls with the bell, then cradle crab walks. Then ran it back again. Back to the flag for some burpees.

    The most beautiful sunrise. COT.

  • Hill of the Skull

    11 shredders cranked up the amps to 11 for an axe-slinging homage to Joe Satriani and Steve Vai.

    Morbid Angel mosey to the roundabout for some warmarama, a Valley of Eternity with SSHs, DQs, Rosalita dips and a whole lot more.

    Mosey around the back to the clockwork hill where we burned some time with 11s, donkey kicks at the top of the steep hill and mirkins at the bottom. Then clockwork LBCs and clockwork APDs. Smoked and we still had a good 20 minutes left.

    Back around the front of the school and all the way down to the base of Mt Chaplin for a triple check – jerkins on the bar, WW2s, timer runs to the end of the lot. Cliffs of Dover wasn’t done so we did burpees almost to the end. Its a very long song.

    Then, the Hill of the Skull. Race to the tip top of the mountain.

    Once up top we crab walk down, bear crawl up. Craw bear down, crab walk up. Bernie down, Bernie up. Bear crawl down, craw bear up. That last one was tough.

    Then over across the top the hills for some WW2s to bring it home.

    COT and coffee.

  • Bang Bang Burpees

    YHC spent the weekend sick in bed but couldn’t not share the latest playlist with 12 of his favorite ramblers. In the famous words of Townes van Zandt, “it’s easier than just waitin’ around to die.”

    Slow mosey Sturgill Simpson style to the back lot and around. Tuesday’s Gone: 7 minutes of OYO warmups threw the PAX into chaos because as Rosie said “I came here to be told what to do.” Mumble chatter was in full effect.

    Count off the wrong triple check numbers, it was approximately a quadruple check but with 3 exercises. YHC didn’t sleep from coughing too much but that’s no excuse. Pole smokers, jump squats, run the loop while Johnny Cash sings ‘The man comes around.’

    Mosey to the bleachers were a couple more attempts at counting were made until we got it right. Step ups, timer runs the field, and shoulder taps.

    A beautiful interlude with Nancy Sinatra. Every ‘bang’ was a burpee. Bang bang, he shot me down, bang bang I hit the ground, bang bang my burpee shot me down.

    Mosey all the way around the field and back towards to the court – stop to pay the toll. Couldn’t seem to tell the difference between incline and decline mirkins. The toll accepts all tender.

    Suicide bears on the basketball court with some jump squats and flutters for the 6. Ab Mary until the last song.

    End with a special musical COT: Don’t nobody know my troubles but God.

  • Frozen Parfait

    YHC had to crowbar his iced car door open, feeling a little overdressed for a balmy 28 degrees. Snow was crunchy on the outside, and on the inside.

    3 reckless souls braved the roads (NTB on foot with his ruck) to ring some bells at Huguenot High.

    The parking lot was ice but the PAX was sure-footed and nimble.

    Warmarama. Mosey to the overhang for a nice dry spot for some WW2 bells, step up bells, chainsaw pulls and a bunch of other stuff.

    Mosey to the lower lot for a triple check. Squats, skull crushers and timer ran the lot while hearing the cracks of ice underfoot.

    Icebreaker all the way up Mt Chaplain.

    Kettlebell games with a shotput throw, swing toss, and discus throw. YHC lost each round but no one was injured so we all won.

    Snow burpees to finish it off.

    COT and coffee.