Author: Snuff

  • The Pandaverse

    Someone’s gotta celebrate National Panda Day, and that someone was us. 5 bumbling bears jacked into their Tron headsets and entered the meatverse. Not the metaverse, because no one burns calories there, but the meatverse. You know, reality.

    Warmarama while listening to the Tron Legacy soundtrack because Daft Punk is excellent. SSHs, DQs, imperial squat walkers, etc. Of course, no one but YHC has seen the movie. Your loss.

    Mosey to the arena where we performed the Cinco de Cheqo. Timer box jumps the big stairs, up and around. Others do flutter, kicks, squats, Carolina dry docks and WW2s. The full 5 rounds.

    Lots of great mumble chatter about the good ol days of being idiot teenagers, and how technology has allowed our own teenagers to ascend to new levels of idiocy. Laughs were had by all.

    Mosey back to the flag where we did finally do some actual panda stuff. Crawl one parking space, ascending mirkins at each line, all the way up to the 10th line and 10 mirkins. Run it back with lunges and double count ball dippers up to 10 for that last burnout.

    Shoutout to Showcase for posting again on your work trip, so glad to have at least one authority figure around with these knuckleheads.

    COT and prayers for gratitude.

  • Hands on a Hardbody

    8 racers lined up on starting block for a special themed workout that YHC made up on the way over per usual.

    The PAX queued up the Drive soundtrack on the radio and channeled their inner Ryan Gosling.

    Warmarama with 40 SSHs, switching to non-cadence DQs, helicopers, cherry pickers, LBCs, mirkins and other various stretches.

    A special Traffic Cone dora with 100 cone-bell swings, 200 cone presses, and 150 kimchi twists over the cone.

    Then, back to the flag where teams of 4 pushed all 4000 lbs of the 4runner to the end of the lot and around the loop. Last Call was quite reckless when he had his turn at the wheel.

    Then, a question was asked. Could 8 men push the truck up the hill? From the bottom of the Forge all the way up to the flag? Yes. That is exactly what we did (with a small pit stop in between). Completely bonkers.

    Parked at the flag and did a quick Mary with 6-in hold and 5 WW2s around the circle.

    A short exercise based on ‘Hands on a Hardbody,’ possibly the greatest documentary of all time. Wall sits on the truck with hoedowns. Then dirty truck hookups. Then wall sit steering wheels, then another around of dirty truck hookups. Don’t take your hand off the truck!

    Last but not least, 1 minute of elbow plank.

    COT and announcements.

    The impossible task of pushing that much weight up the hill on your own is quite possible with the power of the PAX. Drive off into the sunrise.

  • Dark Side of the James

    43 minutes of Pink Floyd brought the memories rushing back. Some good times, some bad trips, some star-crossed teenage heavy petting by someone who shall remain unnamed (Last Call).

    Warmarama – lunges and broad jumps to keep pace with rucking Doublemint. Circle up for some DQs, helicopters, massive numbers of arm circles, copperhead squats, shoulder taps, mirkins, LBCs, and some others lost in the smoky haze of days gone by.

    Parking space ascending squats with broad jumps between. Back again with crab walks and ascending WW2s. By that time Doublemint was long gone so we ran the Old Glory loop to catch up. We caught him right back at the start.

    11s with pole smokers, lunges in between, Carolina dry docks. I think that’s right, but I could be hallucinating. Apologies to the lady walking her dog at 5h45 in the morning – hope you like psychedelic space rock.

    Head to the tennis courts for the Pigskin special: wall sit hoedowns, hip slap balls to the wall, 15 donkey kicks, wall sit milkers, balls to the wall toe taps, 15 donkey kicks, wall sit air press, balls to the wall Australian mountain climbers, 15 donkey kicks, then 10 dirty hookups.

    Heels to heaven until the music stopped.

    Thanks gents for coming out to enjoy a blast from the past. Can’t remember the last time YHC listened to an album all the way through with good friends in the cool outside air. Shout out to Doublemint who is on the mend and continues to show up – being there is a victory not just for him but for us all.

    “Home, home again.
    I like to be here when I can.
    When I come home cold and tired
    It’s good to warm my bones beside the fire.
    Far away across the field
    The tolling of the iron bell
    Calls the faithful to their knees
    To hear the softly spoken magic spells.”

  • Cardinal Rule

    Yesterday, F3 Knoxville tragically lost Cardinal *during* his VQ. This morning, 11 men gathered at The Forge to pay their respects in the only way they knew how: running back the same workout. Sometimes you just gotta face your own mortality – that is the gift that Cardinal offered up to us.

    Warmorama: 15 SSHs, 10 tempo mirkins, 10 Flutter Kicks, 20 arm circles, 10 Hallelujahs, 10 cherry pickers, 20 sec Samson hold in helix position, 10 Willie Mays Hayes.

    Workout: ‘Card’s Run and Repeat’ burpee ladder. (Last Call asked ‘why we couldn’t just do an LBC ladder.’ As anyone at a Snuff workout knows, that’s just foreshadowing.)

    5x of burpees, big boy situps, heels to heaven. Run to the end of the lot and back, then repeat.

    10x of burpees, LBCs, mountain climbers. Run to the end of the lot and back, then repeat.

    15x of burpees, squats, Freddie Mercury. Run to the end of the lot and back, then repeat.

    20x of burpees. Run to the end of the lot and back, then repeat.

    Quite a brutal set of reps. In true RVA style we still had 15 minutes left so we kept it going.

    Mosey to the entrance of the HS and bear crawl all the way to the stairs and down the stairs. Mosey around the lot to the base of Mt Chaplain.

    Up Mt. Chaplain with the LBC ladder Last Call asked for – 10x and adding 5 at each platform all the way to the top.

    Mosey back to the flag.

    Please listen to your body. Listen to your heart. This is the form we have been given to walk through this life, and each person has only one. Cardinal’s passing is a somber yet fortifying reminder that what we do in the gloom matters. To ourselves, to F3 RVA, to the nation, to everyone whose lives we touch throughout each day, spidering outward in a web of strength and leadership. Rest in peace brother.

  • Echo Chamber with a CTD cameo

    Welcome to The Forge Underground, RVA’s most secretive club experience. Part endorphins, part Mission-district oxygen bar post-Google IPO, this wildly exclusive workout is the talk of the Southside glitterati. With all you eat mirkins, this unique venue is hidden deep in the bowels of Hugeunot High school and jamming all morning with the sounds of Snuff’s mind conveniently collected in his Spotify top songs of 2022. “What’s the name of this band?” “The name of this band is Robot Koch.” Incredulous looks. The tunes flowed, the bass echoed off the frozen concrete walls, and the gloom reverberated with the aural manifestations of a mind unhinged.

    After warmups, the tech elite performed a spontaneous addition from DTH: Cinco de checko. Timer runs the loop, monkey humpers, WW2s, wall-sit hoedowns, and hand-release mirkins. Times five rounds. With a nice cherry on top: 11s of donkey kicks and dirty hookups. The tech team monitoring my work computer is very confused.

    Thanks for the rainy morning – post workout rush reminded me of the days of clubbing until the sun comes up. I guess this is just how F3 likes to party. So happy to see Crash Test Dummy roll up. Good man.

  • GratiQ’d

    A cold morning to give thanks to the gloom with some throwback tunes.

    45 minute playlist:

    SSHs, DQs, Mirkins, LBCs, stretching, etc etc.

    4 corners lady of the night with mirkins, American Hammers, jump squats and LBCs.

    Triple set of wall sits, balls to the wall and donkey kicks, Pigskin-style.

    Indigenous bear crawl around the court.

    11s with mirkins and WW2s.

    Basketball court suicides with 5 mirkins. Then another with 10 mirkins.

    Circle up for some Mary, 25 mirkins, then 25 more, and then because we were just going for it, 25 more after that.

    Thanks for entertaining my playlist – music makes it easy to push harder.

    Peace.

  • Sunrise contemplation

    10 men, forged in the gloom fires. YHC was yet again informed that the Q was his.

    Mosey to the circle for warmups: SSHs, DQs, dead man hangs, Imperial Walkers, mirkins, LBCs, etc.

    Flagpole dora: 100 pole smokers, 200 mirkins, 300 jump squats with timer running the short loop.

    Bear crawl to the top of the stairs.

    Breath-slowing exercises.

    Indigenous rail crawl the entire length of the ramp.

    Starting from the bottom, 11s with burpees and WW2s. Halfway through, audible to hand-release mirkins.

    At the road, mosey up to the top of Mt Chaplain for a new exercise called ‘sunrise appreciation.’ 1 full minute of quiet contemplation.

    Another day to be alive and give thanks.

    Peace.

  • Heartburn returns

    Seven samurai gathered to do battle. Joining the fold after a long hiatus – Heartburn’s triumphant return. Alongside FNG Mudslide, we entered the fray.

    Mosey to the back lot for warmups: SSHs, DQs, copperhead squats, slow mirkins, LBCs, rosalita dips, plus some other stuff.

    Mosey to the baseball fields where we immediately rolled around in the wet grass for a triple check: timer box jumps up and around the stairs, plus flutterkicks plus hand-release mirkins.

    Mosey to the way back lot for some parking lot bear crawl ascending mirkins, then run it back with duck walk and ascending squats.

    Mosey to the dog park where sadly, we found that someone has taken the coupons. Out of spite, sprint the length of the dog park followed by 10 burpees, then slow breathing exercises.

    Mosey to the pickleball courts, which were locked, so we went to the tennis courts to do a four corners: 5 burpees, 25 carolina dry docks, 50 2-ct mountain climbers, 100 LBCs.

    Then a triple check with timer running the length of the 3 courts, balls to the wall, and air press wall-sits.

    The PAX asked about Doozy’s whereabouts which reminded YHC that mankillers are a thing. So we did those, which coincidentally happen to be OC’s least favorite exercise. Note to self.

    Mosey to the long wood bar where we did indigenous dips all the way down and around the corner.

    Shoutout to Heartburn for bringing the good vibes after all that he’s been through – great to have you back. And to Mudslide, 51 – welcome and RESPECT.

  • A day late and Nickel short

    Wednesday morning’s workout is now just a faint memory: 3 strong-willed gentlemen broke the quiet stillness of Dogwood Dell with warmups in cadence: DQs, helicopters, dead man hangs, imperial squat walkers, mirkins etc etc.

    Mosey to the Nickel bridge for a mumble-chatter friendly expedition: 20 reps of varying exercises at each light pole including decline mirkins with feet on the rail, WW2s, squats, sprints, and a bunch of other stuff all the way across.

    Burpee bridge on the way back with 2 per lightpole. We stopped to admire the sunrise coming up over the James. Truly a beautiful city.

    Back on land at the big parking lot rocks: alternating box jumps, breath-slowing exercises, 30 hand-release mirkins, breath slowing exercises.

    On the way back to the flag, mosey up the big hill with sprints at every other lightpost.

    Back at the flag, hold 2-minute elbow plank until time.

    Thanks for coming out and thanks to Hitch for the Korean coffee – nothing like dessert for breakfast.

    Peace.

  • Don Quixo-toll

    10 Men of La Mancha gathered in the gloom to tilt at windmills and attempt a new record for Don Quixotes. They thought YHC was joking.

    Mosey to the back lot making sure to NOT pay the toll. Warmups: arm circles and dead man’s hang. Line up on the curb and proceed to Don Quixote broad jump across the entire lot. At the other side, 25 more Don Quixotes.

    Mosey to the field where 2 lines of 5 men each, in tight formation, bear crawl to the opposite end. From there, a walking lunging arc ending up right back at the beginning. A giant D in the dew. What could it possible stand for?

    Mosey further down the field and proceed to walk again in tight formation in a giant circle, arm raises the entire time. Then from the corner of the circle, some other exercise. An enormous D.Q. in the wet grass – as seen from outer space.

    Mosey to the pavilion to find a lone Sancho Panza, sitting on the bench, pondering the fields. What was he thinking, watching the PAX do their Dora, timers running the field and back for 50 Don Quixotes, 100 LBCs and 150 plankjacks?

    Mosey back to the lot for some 50%/75%/100% sprints interspersed with slow-toll mirkins, mirkins and more Don Quixotes.

    Mosey over for a short Post-toll with 25 flutterkicks, 25 jump squats, 25 heels to heaven and 50 ball dippers.

    Heading back to the flag going Low-toll under the bar. At the bridge we do NOT pay the toll. From the bridge, a low-toll duck walk back to the flag where we finished with 5 back-breaking… you guessed it… Don Quixotes.

    A chivalrous COT and great mumble chatter to start the day.

    Shoutout to the PAX for indulging the insanity of a wandering knight, lost in the wilds of his own head.

    Peace.