Author: EF Hutton

  • Chain Smokers

    3 Road Warriors made the trip from ET’s to DogPile, 4 made the trip back. Along the way Hitch told tales of his military days in which smoking was rewarded with a 10 minute break on the hour every hour. Non-smokers kept digging, naturally Hitch picked up smoking.

  • Oh! an Ark Loader

    Even Chum needs a night off, EF took the Q.  Here’s what went down.

    Mosey to the side field.

    COP (IC)

    • Invisible Jump Rope
    • Dead Man Hang
    • Imperial Walkers
    • Helicopters
    • HRMs
    • Elbow Plank
    • Box Cutters
    • Crabcakes

    Mosey back to parking lot triangle

    • Sprint, Mosey, Mosey
    • Sprint, Sprint, Mosey
    • Sprint, Sprint, Sprint

    Mosey to Bus Loop

    Ark Loader (move up and down loop)

    • Bear Crawl, Duck Walk, Crab Walk, Gorilla Shuffle, Polar Bear, Bunny Hop

    Mosey to BBall Court

    Merkin Ladder

    • 1 Merkin, run to other end, 2 Merkins, …up to 10, repeato and back down

    Mosey to back corner

    Double Trouble 1 (3 rounds)

    • P1 – Run to shelter x 10 Dips
    • P2 – Wall Sit

    Double Trouble 2 (3 rounds)

    • P1 – Reverse Plank
    • P2 – Lunge to tree and back

    Double Trouble 3 (3 rounds)

    • P1 – Wall Climb
    • P2 – Touch 3 different trees

    Mary

    • LBCs, Right Leg LBCs, Left Leg LBCs, No Leg LBCs, Reverse Crunch, Heals to Heaven

    Ring of Fire

    Mosey to VSF

    • Burpees x 3

    Numberama, Nameorama, COT

    MOLESKIN

    Perfect conditions for an evening beatdown.  The improvement in Animal and Flea is clear.  Very cool to see their work paying off.  Good to have Bowser (Chum’s 2.0) join the ranks and the banter with Flea and Animal is amusing.  Feels strange to YHC hearing crickets chirp during the Nameorama, but it’ll normalize in time. That Q probably felt a lot like a Chum Q, YHC steals from the OG all the time.

    Announcements –

    Thanksgiving Convergence – Mary 0600

    Black Friday CSAUP – Loops around Forest Hill Park 0700?

  • A Tradition Unlike Any Other – Covid Edition

    Twenty-six long strikers took to the links at Dogwood Dell in a quest for the elusive F3 Mudgear brand Green Jacket in perfect 70ish and sunny weather.  EF planted the flagstick.  Here’s how it went down.

    Mosey down Magnolia Lane to the driving range in front of the Amphitheater.

    COP (IC)

    • Copperhead Squats x 18
    • Helicopters x 18
    • Reverse Crunches x 18
    • Merkins x 18
    • SSHs x 40

    Mosey to the 11th

    Amen 4 Corners (4 rounds)

    • Carolina Dry Docks x 18
    • Mountain Climbers x 18 (2c)
    • LBCs x 18
    • Monkey Humpers x 18

    Plankorama

    Mosey to Rae’s Creekitheater

    • 18 steps down, 4 Derkins each
    • 18 steps up, 4 Dips each

    Cutline is set, then Hardywood led Plankorama w HRMs

    Mosey to the 16th and grab your golf bag (block)

    Drive, Chip, Putt

    • From tee box, hit the circle around the shovel flag – 3 block burpees per stroke, repeato 3 holes

    Mary on the 18th green

    • Freddie M. (Couples) x 18
    • Alphabet – spell AUGUSTA NATIONAL then PIMENTO CHEESE

    Mosey along cart path back to Clubhouse

    19TH GREEN

    Hello Friends.

    Down in Joe-ja some fine southern gentlemen put on a famous little golf tourney each April.  Thanks to Covid that tourney is coming up this week instead.  Up range here at Dogwood Country Club we have our own little tradition unlike any other.  The PAX, fooled by another milestone on the calendar, had little idea of what was to come, but was warmed up and ready to tee off at 0600.  UpChuck was unable to decipher the theme from the number of reps in the COP.  Harvard, my a$$.  During the 4 Corners, Swirly playing speed golf was crossing the Hogan Bridge while the rest of the PAX had yet to make the turn.   As the PAX teed off on ten, a nasty slice sent the PAX into the deep rough of the amphitheater, luckily the PAX was able to pull a 2012 Bubba and hit a miracle shot to get back out and save par.  Moseying over to 16 for the Drive, Chip, and Putt competition, YHC polled Gomer and Swirly, block or no block?  Obviously block.  Perhaps by design, the PAX was hitting range balls rather than Pro V1s making it difficult to reach the green and set ourselves up for birdie.  YHC is pretty certain the PAX was about 6 over through 3, but we’ll just put down 1-under on the ol’ scorecard.  It was the short game, and the long game that let the PAX down.  Never played golf without a few visits from the cart girls and some col’ beer, but it’s always a pleasure to get out and play, nonetheless.  Thanks to all for the birthday goodwill, may the PAX’s days be filled with Eagles and Birdies.  Until next year…

    Numberama

    Nameorama

    COT

    ANNOUNCEMENTS

    1st Thanksgiving convergence – Virginia history Mary Munford 6am 1 hour

    Black Friday CSAUP – Forest Hill loops – preblast forthcoming

  • Pumphouse Church Roundabout

    Seven intrepid warriors put in miles before and after the main event. The PAX humored YHC and took the route less traveled. Cary to Freeman past City Stadium, Douglasdale, Rugby to Pumphouse Drive past the Church Roundabout and up the hill to the flag. 2.55 miles in, rougly 1.5 back.

  • Old Stomping Grounds

    Twelve PAX traveled north into the Sterlingwood neighborhood of near west end RVA. Here’s the route: 

    All Runners:

    • Around baseball field to College
    • Right on University
    • Right on Westham
    • Left on Baldwin

    4s:

    • Right on Patterson
    • Right on Hollins
    • Left on Woodberry
    • Right on Horsepen
    • Through the Fraternity Row fence and Robin’s Center parking lot
    • Back to flag

    5s:

    • Left on Patterson
    • Right on Valley
    • Right on Hillview (Pass Profit’s house)
    • Left on Ware (Pass EF’s old house)
    • Right on Granger
    • Right on Hillside
    • Left on Patterson
    • Right on Hollins
    • Left on Woodberry
    • Right on Horsepen through Fraternity Row
    • Left on College Rd
    • Right on Campus
    • Right on UR Drive
    • Back to flag

    6s:

    • Left on Patterson
    • Right on Valley
    • Right on Three Chopt
    • Right on Hillside
    • Left on Patterson
    • Right on Hollins
    • Left on Woodberry
    • Left on Horsepen
    • Reverso at Patterson down Horsepen through Fraternity Row
    • Left on College
    • Right on Campus
    • Right on UR Drive
    • Back to flag

    Numberama, Nameorama, COT

    MOLESKIN

    Set out to make the route simpler than YHC’s last couple of attempts to Q SpiderRun.  On paper it looks like a heck of a lot of turns but it really was a very straight forward route except the 5’s quick trip through YHC’s old neighborhood.  No reports of lost PAX, so apparently it worked out.  Plenty of hills and plenty of downhill.  Horsepen is much better to go up than down.    

    ANNOUNCEMENTS

    Congrats to TYA, Saab, Gomer Pyle, Circle K, and Swiper for completing a heck of a CSAUP.

    Lift up Offshore and family as his MIL passed away

  • Revisionist History

    October 16th, 2015 F3 RVA was forever changed.  From that date forward every workout has mysteriously been 70 and sunny.  Here’s what transpired on the 5th anniversary (observed):

    Mosey to the Amphitheater.

    COP

    • Dead Man Hang
    • DQs
    • Copperhead Squats
    • Jazzercises
    • SSHs
    • Merkins
    • Suzanne Somers L/R
    • Freddie Mercurys

    Mosey toward Rusty Cage

    Triple Check

    • P1 – Run to Cage 10 Pullups and back
    • P2 – Monkey Humpers
    • P3 – Heals to Heaven

    Mosey to Front of Carillon

    Triple Check 2

    • P1 – Bear Crawl to Fence and 10 WWIIs
    • P2 – Hand Release Merkins
    • P3 – Imperial Squat Walkers

    Mosey to Bamboo Hut

    Triple Check 3

    • P1 – Wall Climbs
    • P2 – WWIIs
    • P3 – Run Loop

    Quick Mary

    • LBCs
    • Reverse Crunch

    Mosey to SF

    Numberama, Nameorama, COT

    MOLESKIN

    If there’s one thing YHC has learned over his years with F3 is that success takes an individual effort.  And when one accomplishes something however menial, it should be celebrated and self-focused.  The PAX gathered on this day not to become better but to marvel at YHCs accomplishment in hopes of gleaning just a smidge of greatness.  To truly celebrate this momentous occasion, YHC has put together a timeline of all the times he has inspired the PAX, achieved unconscionable feats of athleticism, and elevated the PAX to heights unimaginable.

    November 6, 1980 – A bandanaed baby is born unto the world and it was said “When this child speaks, people listen.”

    November 7, 1980 – The millennial generation begins.

    September 23, 1989 – Cople Elementary, PE teacher calls for Jumping Jacks, Sit-ups, and Push-ups.  The child says “No, we shall call them Side Straddle Hops, WWIIs, and Merkins” and it becomes true.

    December 31, 2010 – The Chosen One plants a seed in Charlotte, NC using a shovel attached to a flag.  That seed, with the help of a couple of dudes tapped to “Q” the next morning, sprouts and continues to spread, like Kudzu.

    September 2014 – The Kudzu reaches RVA.  Prophets, henceforth known as Corporate, are sent to prepare the way.

    October 16, 2015 – The PAX meets a friendly new guy and a light begins to shine on RVA.  This friendly new guy is baptized in sweat and given a new moniker and it is good.

    February 22, 2016 – Prophecy is fulfilled, EF Hutton speaks for the first time, the PAX listens.  Suddenly the rain at NoToll dries up and the fields become green and lush.

    February 2017 – Friendly competition amongst the PAX triggers a record keeping of data.  EF says to Splinter “the data is good, but make it Big.”

    April 6, 2017 – A golf tournament is held in Augusta, Georgia in honor of F3RVA’s “A Tradition Unlike Any Other”

    April 22, 2017 – America’s toughest road race is challenged by America’s toughest man, man wins

    July 11, 2017 – 2nd annual inaugural Home Run Derby, Hardywood launches a bomb headed for the stratosphere, EF says not today my friend, more burpees.  Ricky Henderson smiled.

    September 2017 – 2nd F is revolutionized when EF creates a new brand of football, something never seen or done before, this popular brand of football shall become known as fantasy football

    September 2017 – Civil War erupts among the PAX.  Fresh off a near death experience, EF leads his team to a come-from-behind BRR victory while bearcrawling to the finish line.

    April 7, 2018 – A new standard of excellence is established as EF completes the Corporate Challenge, few will ever again understand how this is actually done.

    April 13, 2018 – Team Tuckahoe brings home the Century Classic in dominating fashion as EF blows by Marcel Marceau in the darkness of Windsor Farms.  Marcel returns to the School for Mimes never to be heard from again.

    September 2019 – Rematch at BRR, in an act of mercy and extreme sportsmanship EF allows Team Corporate to cross the finish line first.

    September 2019 – 2nd F is once again revolutionized when EF creates a game now known as Cornhole.  Inspired to be the best, the Stache Bros retire from adult entertainment to train full time in the art of the bag toss.

    March 12, 2020 – EF joins the 500 club as officially recorded by Big Data

    October 14, 2020 – EF secures the AO on his 633rd recorded attempt, Swirly was proud

    Alright, alright, alright, maybe this timeline isn’t exactly true and my facts may be a little skewed, but I’ll tell you what is true, and that’s the greatness of this brotherhood.  So many memories have been made, however questionable they may be.  I’ve been inspired and challenged and made a little better each day.  Looking forward to 5 more.  As for this revised history, Upchuck put me up to it. 

    ANNOUNCEMENTS

    Breaking Bread – last Saturday and Sunday of the month – need volunteers

    Beer Mile Saturday 8pm Carillon

    CSAUP – October 23rd

    Shoe Drive – All month long

  • Alpaca Beans

    A six pack put in miles in search of another six pack. Got it done at a very healthy clip today. 4ish miles at a roughly an 8-8:30 pace. Rosie did a bit more because he’s excellent. Conversation was great and educational. Alpaca sh*t is full of nitrogen and makes a darn fine tea according to Mrs. Wood.

  • Too Many Words

    No Q as of 10pm Monday, YHC stepped up with something simple.  Here’s the route: 

    All Runners:

    • Richmond Way to Westhampton Way
    • Right to stay on Westhampton Way
    • Continue on Crenshaw Way
    • Right on UR Dr
    • Left on River Rd
    • Left into Batcave
    • Right on Ridgeway Rd

    4s:

    • Right on Roselawn Rd
    • Left on Towana Rd
    • Left on College
    • Through the Robin’s Center parking lot
    • Back to flag

    5s:

    • Right on Fairway View Rd
    • Left on Topoan Rd
    • Left on Towana Rd
    • Continue on Campus Dr
    • Quick diversion up Bostwick Ln
    • Continue on Campus Dr
    • Left on College Rd
    • Through the Robin’s Center parking lot
    • Around the Lake
    • Back to flag

    6s:

    • Same as 5s but stay on College Rd
    • Left on Westhampton Way
    • Right on Crenshaw Way
    • Left on UR Dr
    • Left on Richmond Way
    • Back to flag

    Numberama, Nameorama, COT

    MOLESKIN

    When EF Hutton speaks, people listen, except when there’s too many words.  Sometimes a little goes a long way.  Today’s directions included too many details, like run past the amphitheater and tennis courts and zig-zag across Three Chopt, or make a loop around the dogwalker on Crenshaw.  Next week 23 minutes out, 22 minutes back.  Great to see a couple of familiar faces back out and to have a newbie join the ranks.  Welcome Wacker, weeds, moles, other things, whatever it takes. 

    ANNOUNCEMENTS

    Retreat 10/3

    Cornhole sign up – https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1-L8e9W24ygnU0suaGyKxzi1PgPqY1CBd57hLrKTZI-g/edit#gid=1886940921

    CSAUP 10/23-10/24 Preblast coming

  • Breakfast Club Appetizer

    Breakfast Club is the chips and salsa to DogPile’s burrito. Sure you can have one without the other, but why?

  • Launch Time – 0531

    No anarchy this week, YHC was ready to lead.  Here’s how: 

    The Route

    All Runners:

    • Around baseball field
    • Through fraternity row fence
    • Up Hampshire/ Horsepen
    • Left on Normandy
    • Dogleg across to Sweetbriar
    • Left on Baldwin

    4s:

    • Dogleg across Westham stay on Baldwin
    • Right on Wood
    • Left on Lakewood
    • Left on College
    • Around baseball field
    • Back to flag

    5s:

    • Right on Westham
    • Left on Sunset/University
    • Left on College
    • Right on Campus
    • Right on Gateway
    • Back to flag

    6s:

    • Same as 5s but stay on Campus
    • Right on Roselawn
    • Left on Ridgeway
    • Back to flag

    Numberama, Nameorama, COT

    MOLESKIN

    YHC shared a friendly reminder not to judge too harshly, lest you turn out to be the a$$hole yourself.  YHC’s neighbor has mowed his lawn probably twice all summer.  YHC thought he was a real jerk.  After finally doing so again on Sunday YHC snarkily said to his neighbor, “bet you’re glad that’s done.”  The neighbor replied, “yeah it’s really hard for me.  I’m not well with my cancer treatments.  I guess I’m lucky to have lived this long though after being shot, stabbed, breaking my neck, and now cancer twice.”  Turns out YHC’s neighbor is also a veteran.  YHC will mow his neighbor’s lawn from now on.  Last lesson of the day, if you complain about launching at 0531 instead of 0530, you might just be the a$$hole.

    ANNOUNCEMENTS

    Retreat 10/3

    Cornhole sign up here: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1-L8e9W24ygnU0suaGyKxzi1PgPqY1CBd57hLrKTZI-g/edit#gid=1886940921